Here Is the Place Where I Love You
by MarMarJ
Summary: Peeta has finally returned to Katniss safe and sound in District 13. Their lives have been effected drastically, but together, they can lead the rebellion and end The Hunger Games once and for all. But when the two are faced with another problem, Katniss is forced to save another person she cannot afford to loose. **Peeta isn't hijacked**
1. Chapter 1

Katniss ran down the halls and rooms, Haymitch following her, walking fast. She pushed past crowds of doctors and nurses, and she reached the medical room, spotting a familiar face. It was Johanna, her dark spiky hair was shaved and she had crimson scars and bruises lined along her cheeks and arms. Katniss starred at her for a second, shocked. She shook her head slightly as she continued, trying to find Peeta. Katniss couldn't find him, though; she spun scanning the room for Peeta's acquainted blonde hair.

"Haymitch?" Her voice trembled in worry. "Where is he?"

Haymitch could see her trembling and breathing hard, fighting tears. He grabbed her by the shoulders to keep her still and he had opened his mouth to say something, but she froze for a second and thrashed out of his grip, because she had heard Peeta's voice. She called back; her voice was desperate and full of worry. "Peeta…? Peeta!?" And again, Katniss heard his call, and she chased after the voice. There he was, dressed in white hospital clothes. He struggled free of the grasp of a nurse's hands, who were flashing lights in his eyes. He looked extremely weak and it was obvious that he was left without nourishment for days. Katniss let out a shriek, she sprinted towards him. Peeta did the same with tears streaming through the dirt and blood on his battered face. Katniss immediately wrapped her arms around his neck, her body being agonized by sobs and cries of sorrow. Her screams were a mixture of Peeta's name and snivelling. He wrapped his arms around the back of her upper thighs and lifted her up to meet his face. Despite how weak he appeared, he was able to lift her off the ground a few inches and frantically pepper her face and neck with kisses. Katniss kissed him back, their tongues greeting each other. Her hands shook as they ran through Peeta's ashy blonde hair. She brought her legs up around his waist locking behind his back tightly, making him immediately fall to his knees, but not caring. He kissed her neck slowly this time, carefully. He calmly stroke her dark waves. He was trying to keep her calm, trying to tell her that she wasn't dreaming. That he was here.

"Peeta…" she took his face in her hands, feeling his hollow cheeks and starred deep into his eyes which were full of pain.

"It's okay, Katniss. I'm okay, I'll be fine. I'm here," He murmured weakly.

Katniss held her lips against his and the kiss resembled the one they shared on the beach in the clock arena. She stopped every few seconds to gasp for air or to let out another wail.

"What did they do to you…? I thought you were…" She whispered against his lips. They tasted like blood. She ran her fingers through his hair in the opposite direction it was growing.

Peeta gave her a silent "shh". The world around them felt like it had vanished; the only two people in this world were the two of them. Katniss never felt anyone embrace her so tightly. Prim didn't even hug her like this when she said goodbye after the first Reaping. Despite how weak Peeta appeared, he was still closing every gap between them, and sealing them closed.

"Peeta, honey, we need to finish your blood test." A nurse placed her hand on his shoulder. Peeta ignored her for a second while he rested his forehead against Katniss'. He grasped her hands tightly with his and lifted them up to his lips. A grin found its way to Katniss' lips.

"Go do your blood test," She said soothingly.

Katniss sat next to Peeta as the nurses and doctors crowded around them to do several other tests on him. She observed how beaten he looked. There were bags under his tired blue eyes, and a bruise on his left eye. A burn above his right brow which was bearing flecks of blood. Katniss wanted to help him, so eagerly; she picked up a disinfectant patch of cloth. The moment the fabric made contact with Peeta's irritated skin; he flinched and let a grunt of pain.

"Sorry," She apologized. "Does it sting?"

Peeta nodded. He touched the wound with a two fingers and his face contracted. He looked at his fingers which had his blood on them.

"Here," Said a nurse. She had short dark curls and bronze skin, which reminded Katniss of Rue. The nurse placed a wet cloth on Peeta's wound, wiping the blood away gently. Peeta clenched Katniss' hand as the nurse replaced the wet cloth with a dry one and taped it above Peeta's brow with medical tape.

Peeta turned his attention to Katniss as doctors left and finished cleaning his wounds, wrapping him in bandages, and slowly putting in stitches on his cheeks and forearms. He took her face in his hands and examined her loveliness. He had dreamed about her curled next to him since the Capitol had thrown him into his cell. Just looking into Peeta's apprehensive eyes made Katniss want to cry. Peeta could see tears joining hands to become a river, so he pulled her in for a kiss on her forehead and a hug. The tears flowed and she let herself melt into Peeta's embrace. Her gray eyes settled on a bag of blood behind Peeta. She trailed the cord with her eyes, which led her to the back of one of Peeta's elbows. A whimper escaped her lips and she squeezed her eyes shut.

"Wonder what they did with all of my blood back in the Capitol, huh?" Peeta attempted to make her feel better with a joke. He was facing her now, tears still flowing down both of their cheeks. As a reply, she smiled sadly. It filled Peeta with more despair.

"I can't believe this," Tears stinging in her eyes. "I thought they would kill you." Katniss recalled the night Gale and the others flew to the Capitol to rescue Peeta, Johanna and Annie. She remembered when she went into a meltdown, thinking Snow was going to kill both Gale and Peeta. That she would lose them both. Thinking of the memory scared her. She tightened her grip on Peeta's white shirt and cried onto his shoulder.

"Well," Peeta retorted. "I didn't tell anyone this," he sounded afraid. "Not even the doctors, who were urging me to tell them everything. I want to tell you mainly." He swallowed hard. "It might scare you." Katniss shook her head. "It won't. Just tell me, it's okay."

Peeta nodded in reply. "After I warned you – about the bombing- you know how… the Peacekeepers pulled me away from the camera?"

"Yes," Katniss whispered. She replayed the image in her head, where she saw Peeta's blood stain the floor, his scream of pain.

"They knocked me out after that. And I woke up in a different room- I was in a room, strapped to a table and I waited for something that felt like an hour. Although I don't really know how long I was in there for. After that, the guards who tortured me came in, and they started to mess around with these substances next to the table that I was strapped to. It smelt strong, like some kind of medicine… then they…" His voice drifted off. Katniss was staring at him with worry and curiosity.

"Then they…? What? Tell me, its ok, I won't tell anyone else." She leaned against his frail body. Peeta swallowed, as he taken aback to the memory. "They started injecting the stuff into me. And it hurt, like when it got into my veins, it stung. Like acid. But the pain… it felt familiar." Katniss ran her hand along his arm, going past a white cotton ball taped to the back of his elbow. It must be covering up the tiny wound that the Capitol gave him. "I started hallucinating, and you were there. Next to me, next to the guards. You stared at me, but you didn't do anything. I thought it was really you, and I shouted at you, trying to make you help me." Katniss' eyes were filled with worry. She wrapped her arms around him and embraced him. She shook her head.

"I would never do that, Peeta. Never. I wouldn't be able to stand someone doing that to you. But now you're safe. With me. That'll never happen again." What they both didn't know, was that it was a failed attempt at Peeta's hijacking.

When night fell, Peeta told Katniss to go back to Prim and her mother for the night – since she only spoken to them about Peeta for about half an hour. So she did. But it wasn't in a matter of minutes that she came running back to him, telling him she had a nightmare. When in reality, she just wanted to be there for him, the way he was always there for her on the train. She just needed to feel his lips on hers, his arms enveloping her.


	2. Chapter 2

It had been just 5 days, but Peeta was getting back the nutrition he needed. The pained look in his eyes was almost gone. He still had several bandages wrapped around his arms and torso, and many of his scars were already pink.

Now with Peeta back, things had changed once again. Katniss couldn't leave Peeta out of sight anymore- she didn't want to lose him again; she didn't even want anyone laying a finger on him. She had already shoved Johanna against the wall for crashing into Peeta in a hall, causing both of them to stumble to the ground. He kept telling Katniss that she had to calm down, that she was being a bit too overprotective. Being stubborn as she always was, she didn't listen, telling him it was for his own good.

Peeta had left the hospital just today and he had been assigned his own room. He and Katniss spent aeons just holding each other in there. Barely ever being disturbed. They sat in the cafeteria, along with the others, Delly, Johanna, Finnick and Annie. Katniss looked around for Gale.

"Have you guys seen Gale lately?" She asked scanning the stuffed cafeteria. Delly put her glass down and looked up at Katniss.

"I saw him this morning. I think he went out hunting or something, because he had his crossbow with him." Katniss nodded. _Strange._ She thought. He had never gone hunting without her – at least without her knowing. Was Gale mad at her? They hadn't spoken since the day he came back from the rescue. She didn't even go back to see him and ask him if he was alright after receiving multiple wound at the Tribute Center. If he was, she understood. She had spent so much time with Peeta, telling him he was fine when she'd feel him jolt from a nightmare, nursing him the way she did in the arena, but with better supplies. Before, when Peeta had had nightmares, he would stay frozen for a time until he realized everything was okay. Nowadays, Katniss could hear him whimper and yelp as if he was being harmed. Katniss looked over at Peeta, whose eyes were closed as he rested his chin on his hands. She observed his face for a while. She wondered how much sleep he would get while he was being tortured. Looking down at his plate, she realized he had hardly touched his meal.

"Peeta, you need to eat," Instantly, his eyes flickered open and he let out a groan. Katniss raised a spoonful of turnips and led them in front of his lips. He hesitated at first, but then opened his mouth. Katniss watched him as he ate the turnips. He was used to not eating. Even though the few days following his rescue he couldn't get enough food into him. Katniss was always left in shock how he would leave not a single crumb on his plate. But now, it's like he was literally fed up with food itself. She got another spoonful but this time, Peeta simply shook his head and looked up at the TV screen in the cafeteria.

"Peeta, seriously. It`s for your own fucking good." She snapped. Her eyes narrow with frustration. Peeta just kept shaking his head. "Katniss, don`t." Katniss gave him a glare and kept the spoonful of turnips in the same spot.

"Stop treating him like a kid." Johanna retorted. Katniss lost her patience and dropped the spoon and got up to leave. She was having a hard enough time cooperating with her own life already-with the rebellion and whatnot. Peeta yawned as he watched Katniss leave down the hall. Finnick could see how his eyelids drooped. "Just go and say sorry, then sleep with her." He grinned. A smile tugged at the end of Peeta's lips and shook his head. "I'll just go apologize." He stood up and walked in Katniss' direction. When he turned the corner, she was almost at the end of the hall speed walking. He wondered where she was headed, and he could even see anger in the way she walked. Her hips swaying a bit too much, her hands the doing the same. Her shoulders seemed tense, and you could see the tiny hops she would make every step she took. It wouldn't look natural for anyone, even someone who had just met her. After several turns, Katniss ended up at the door of the dormitory she shared with Prim and her mother. Peeta thought she was over-reacting. He stood at the door looking down at the handle for a few seconds, waiting if he could hear any noises coming from inside. There was silence. Maybe she was tired too, tired of living like a kite, tired of this day. Tired of being the one pulling the kite, really. When he knocked, it was like Katniss suspected. "You would do it for me. Wouldn't you?" Peeta automatically recognized her words from the cave. She sounded irritated.

"Katniss," he replied calmly. "Kat, I'm sorry. I just haven't been able to keep myself together-"

"Just get in here." Peeta obeyed, and he slowly opened the door to find her on her bed, leaning against the ledge which held her father's picture on it and the silver parachute from the Quell. In one of her hands was the black pearl. Her eyes were fixed on him with the look she always had in the tribute center when they trained. Katniss put the pearl on the ledge and sat up straight. "What am I going to do with you, Peeta?" He smiled and sighed. "I'm sorry." Katniss got up and dragged him towards her bed, sitting him down. "No. I am," she made a worthless effort to pull her hair out of her face, because it fell back into place. "For pushing you. For being so harsh." Peeta put the strand of hair behind an ear and ran his thumb along her eyebrows and her high cheekbones. Katniss avoided eye contact. "Look at me," he whispered. Katniss pretended as if she didn't hear him. Peeta leaned his head in the direction Katniss was starring, forcing her to look at him.

"I don't care how protective you are," he spoke, "You don't need to apologize. I know you're just trying to help me," He said, running a finger across the scar above her eyebrow she had gotten in the first arena. Katniss put her hand around his head and brought him in close, their foreheads pressed together. She skimmed her lips along his and opened her mouth a little. Peeta gave her a peck on her upper lip. Slowly, Peeta moved down from her lips to her neck. Katniss felt her pulse quicken and she hesitantly laid herself back down onto the bed and Peeta pressed his lips harder onto her skin. He ran his hands along the sides of her hips, positioning them under his. Peeta had made a mental note to himself that if he and Katniss ever got closer, he wouldn't do anything passionate (other than a kiss) with her until she was ready. But now he just wanted to make her feel loved, make her feel that he was sorry.

"Peeta-" Her voice shaky. Peeta knew she was scared.

"Shh," He whispered between their lips. ''It`s okay,'' He sounded the way he did when they were reunited. ''Don`t be afraid,''

Katniss looked up at the ceiling. ''…I'm not afraid…'' She closed her eyes and let herself enjoy the moment. She wasn`t sure if Peeta was actually going to go any further, but a voice in her head told her that she should tell him to stop.

"Do you want me to stop?"

"No. Please…" She whimpered. "Please, Peeta…don't…stop, please don't." She struggled for breath for some reason, despite that her breath was coming out fast. She dreaded a moment like this after her first games, but now… she never wanted to let Peeta go. Katniss had gotten lost in her thoughts for a few seconds looking up at the ceiling feeling Peeta's hands touch a spot he had never felt. Before she knew it, Peeta was already slipping her grey District 13 shirt off from her. She watched him curiously, and cautiously. She never thought this would happen so early.


	3. Chapter 3

The rest of the day flew by amazingly fast. It surprised Katniss how little time it all felt like, but she had to admit that she had never felt so weary and relieved in her life. She was with Peeta. In his room, since they knew it wasn't a good idea to keep the awkward tension in Katniss' room where Prim or her mother could walk in at any moment. She felt safe locked in Peeta's arms which were no longer frail.

When Peeta had left her without anything but her under clothes, he was already hovering above her removing his garments quickly, knowing she was feeling exposed. She could feel her heart beating fast since she had little knowledge about any of what he was going to do to her. She yearned for more of everything Peeta could give her every time he would run his gentle hands along a part of her body that he had never felt. She urged him when he had reached the area where she wanted him most, but Peeta hesitated because he didn't want to hurt her.

His name was on her lips every few seconds, and it would escape her mouth with a few quiet moans, acknowledging that anyone could be listening. Peeta would whisper things to both himself and Katniss. She could hear him say 'beautiful' several times when he was at her mid-torso, and he spoke that he loved Katniss when he and Katniss formed into one. Every time, his voice intensified and there would be more desire in every word he said. This made Katniss reach her highpoint faster, just hearing Peeta say that he loved her.

Now they lay in Peeta's bed. It was still a little early for bed, but Katniss felt exhausted. She was in her white nightgown that she took with her to Peeta's room, and Peeta was wearing a simple white shirt and grey pants. He had fallen asleep hours ago, with his chin resting on the top of her head. His slow breaths steadied Katniss and calmed her. She closed her eyes for what felt like the billionth time, trying to join Peeta in a relaxed sleep. But every time she would feel herself float away into slumber, her eyes would instantly open from a nightmare beginning to form in her head. Peeta jolted slightly and he moved his head to Katniss' chest and rested it there. His grip at her waist tightened. The dim light from the wall behind them filled the room with a cozy bronzed glow. Katniss began to run her fingers through Peeta's curls and planted a soft kiss on his nose. With that, he woke up, and he peered up at what he thought was the most beautiful sight in the world.

"Hi," he said grinning, recalling the events from a few hours ago. "Hello." Katniss responded.

"How do you feel?"

"Good. Fine. Why?"

"Just wanted to know. You look pretty." Katniss laughed quietly. He always thought she looked pretty. "But you look different in a way. Even prettier than I've ever seen you without all the makeup and costumes. You look happy."

"I am." She confessed. Peeta gave her a mischievous smile. It scared her a little, but she already knew what he is thinking. Katniss put her arm around his neck and gave him a kiss on his already open mouth. He wanted more. She knew he wanted a lot more, but everything they had done was enough for today. "What time is it?" Peeta wriggled himself up so Katniss could rest her head on his lap. He moved his head a little to peer at the clock by the door. "Six. Dinner's probably being handed out right now. Do you wanna go?" Katniss shook her head.

"They'll read our expressions and it'll get really awkward." She stretched herself out on Peeta's lap while a laugh came out of her. Peeta joined in and stretched his arms over his head.

"Wow, is it that obvious? By looking at me, can you tell something happened?" Katniss sat up. Peeta looked flushed with happiness too. There was still lust in his eyes. At the same time, he looked tired. Katniss smiled and nodded. He scoffed.

"C'mere." He held his arms out. Katniss scooted over back into his reach and wrapped her arms around his torso. She straddled his hips and leaned her cheek against his chest, closing her eyes. Peeta held her and looked down at her looking peaceful. "I could do this all day." Katniss brought herself closer to him with her legs. "Me too." They brought their faces together, Katniss keeping her eyes closed. She brought her hand to his neck and gave him soft pecks on his jawline. Peeta smelt faint of clean laundry detergent and fresh air. Strange, because of their intimacy, but they weren't in the same room anymore. She got off of him and lied down again.

"I'm tired, Peeta. I think I'm going to call it a day." Peeta ran his hand over her forehead soothingly, brushing away little strands of dark hair. "Ok," he kissed the crown of her head. He got up from the bed and slipped his shoes on. Katniss sat up slightly. "Where are you going?"

"I'm gonna take a little stroll. Let's hope that the fact that you're not with me will make everything less obvious." He smirked. "Why don't you just stay?" She asked. Peeta shrugged. "I won't be long, I promise. We can sleep when I get back, 'kay?"

"'Kay."

When Peeta left, Katniss starred up at the ceiling. Her eyes widened in shock for a few seconds thinking there was no protection included in their intimacy, when she remembered she had gotten the shot to prevent pregnancy this month already. She was forced to, even though Peeta wasn't in 13 yet. Coin didn't want any baby Mockingjays, since she already knew that Katniss and Gale, in a way, needed and valued each other. Katniss pondered about how much tougher her life would be if she had gotten pregnant before the Quarter Quell. She would have mourned over the baby after the Quell, because, not only was it her child, but she would have lost that one part of Peeta she was hoping to keep.

Her eyelids were getting heavier with sleep, and soon, she was asleep. Katniss remembered hearing the door open, and feeling Peeta lift the blanket slightly and wriggle in with Katniss. He brought her body close to his and her head to his chest and she placed her ear over his heart and listened to the calming beat. She clawed at his shirt gently to bring herself closer to him.

Peeta looked down at her. Taking in her beauty and her scent. He closed his eyes and rested with Katniss clutched to his chest.

She didn't dream that night. She only felt herself float in a black void, but she wasn't scared. Even while she slept, she could still fell Peeta's arms keeping her encased in warmth and safety. He watched her chest rise and fall against his, her dark lashes quivering softly and suddenly. The sound of her calm breathing soothed him to sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

Peeta jolted awake, noticing that Katniss was no longer curled at his chest. He sat up slowly, rubbing sleep from his eyes. It was early; 6:57 AM. He scanned the room for any signs of Katniss, but all that was left was her white nightgown lying on the bed on the other side of his room. He sighed, wishing she had woken him. Slowly, he got out of bed, and entered the bathroom, with Katniss' grey clothes gone from the stool by the sink. Peeta didn't remember Katniss saying that she was leaving anywhere in the morning. She had probably gone out to search for food. It was almost 7:00 AM, which was when breakfast started. Peeta quickly changed into his drab outfit and brushed his teeth. As he passed the mirror, he noticed how his hair was flattened down against his forehead. He ruffled his hair so it spiked up like thorns.

Peeta opened the door and stuck out his head, looking both ways down the long hallway. A trio of young children who appeared to all be the same age, ran down the hall towards the cafeteria giggling. He followed them and watched from behind as they started skipping. What amazed Peeta of the trio was the girl with flaming red hair. She wore it in two braids. It reminded Peeta of Katniss of when they were little. It was a rarity to see people in 12 with red hair. The girl turned around and saw Peeta looking at her and the other two boys. She grabbed the two boys by the back of their shirts lightly and murmured something in their ears, and they stopped skipping and walked quietly down the hall.

Peeta scoffed silently and continued observing them. The girl turned around to see if he was still there, and gave him a shy grin. When they reached the cafeteria, Peeta automatically spotted the long wavy dark hair. She was sitting with Prim, and her mother. _Why the hell would she sit with them? If her mother found out who knows what she'd do to Katniss. _Katniss was staring at the table. It appeared as if she had finished her breakfast, and she looked uncomfortable already. Was she having second thoughts? Thinking about it sent a shiver down Peeta's spine. He walked a little closer but slid into the lineup of breakfast so she couldn't see him. Her glare was ice cold. It looked like she didn't want to be bothered. Once Peeta had gotten a tray, he felt someone poke his arm. He turned and was looking down at the pale freckled face of the girl he was fascinated by in the hallway. He was even more fascinated now. Her gaze was a jewel green and innocent.

"Hi." She said quietly.

"Hello."

She was wearing the same shy smile she gave Peeta in the passageway. The way she looked at it made it seem like she knew who he was. Most likely; the whole country recognized he and Katniss's faces. "You're her boyfriend, right?" She smiled. Peeta gave her his crooked smile and nodded.

"Well…" He drifted off, thinking - making sure that he knew the answer. And he had it. "Yes. I guess you could say that, yes. What's your name?"

"Tawny." She was probably named that for her locks, even though her hair was brighter.

"It's nice to meet you, Tawny. I'm Peeta."

"Yeah, I know who you are. Wanna be friends?" She said holding out her pinky finger. Peeta grinned, confused.

"I'd love to be friends with you, Tawny. What…what's this?" He asked. Tawny raised her thin eyebrows in question. "Oh, it's like a promise." She grabbed his hand and made it into the form her hand was in. "Then we hook 'em together; it's a promise that we'll be friends forever." Tawny hooked her pinky with Peeta's and held it there.

"Oh, I see. So tell me. Now that we're friends, how come you told your other friends to stop running in the hall? There was nothing wrong with it." Peeta told her as he began to serve himself breakfast.

"Oh, they're my brothers, Kylek and Sawyer. We're triplets. I thought you got annoyed," Tawny giggled. "I told them we needed to stop running and be quiet or else you would get mad, because it happens a lot with our parents and older people." Peeta smiled.

"I wouldn't get mad at you kids for doing that. You all looked like you were having fun and you looked happy, I wouldn't stop you from having fun, there's nothing wrong with being happy. Who says you can't be?" Tawny shrugged. Peeta actually enjoyed seeing children happy. It made him let go of his worries for a while. How he wanted to have kids of his own someday.

Someone called Tawny's name, and Peeta turned around to see a woman with reddish- brown hair around her mid- 30's sitting at a table with Tawny's brown-haired brothers and whom he believed was the kids' father.

"I have to go eat now," Tawny spoke. "Remember, we're friends, so I'll see you later. Bye, Peeta!" She exclaimed. Tawny skipped off towards her family, her ginger braids bouncing against her shoulders. Tawny's mother smiled at him and returned her attention to her family. Peeta did the same, but with Katniss. She was sitting alone now, her sister and mother had probably gone to do their hospital duties. Peeta approached her and sat down across from her. She kept her silver eyes glued to the table, not noticing Peeta had sat down in front of her.

"Hey." He tried to sound comforting, because she didn't look well.

"Hey," She replied, not moving and keeping her gaze down. Peeta reached for her hand on the table and put his on top of hers. He soothingly ran his thumb against her clenched fist and it relaxed a little.

"Are you alright?" He asked, worried that last night had caused some conflict between them.

"No." Katniss murmured firmly.

Peeta leaned down to get a better view of her eyes. He could see fire. She was angry, and she was breathing hard. Katniss looked at his blue gaze. The flames in her eyes were put out as if his blue eyes were water. The anger had been replaced by calmness. She was steadied by his touch and look. Her eyes now displayed love. Peeta smiled lightly and moved his hand against her cheek. "What's the matter? Do I need to apologize about so-"

"Oh, Peeta, no. I couldn't be mad at you for… for last night." She whispered the last part quietly. "I'm not mad at you, it's…" Katniss' voice drifted away. The anger returned to her eyes. Her eyebrows were narrowed, which meant she was already losing her temper. Her breathing quickened again.

"Katniss, calm down. Tell me what it is you're mad at." Katniss sighed and sat up straight.

"It's Gale I'm mad at." Peeta leaned in closer. "He's the one who got mad at me in the first place, because…" She stopped and just laid it all on Peeta. "Peeta, he heard us. He got mad about it, and he started asking me about it. I told him he should just leave us alone and that he was crossing the line. But I guess I wasn't thinking straight because that just made him get angrier at me. He brought up the fact that I never went to ask him how he was doing after they rescued you from the Capitol. I told him I was sorry, but he wouldn't listen." Katniss looked at Peeta with tears forming in her eyes. "Peeta, I just don't want him to ruin our relationship, he's… he's such an asshole, I can't stand him, he's making everything worse, actually, he made everything worse after he…!" She was yelling now, and was attracting attention.

"Katniss, keep your voice down-"

"HE KISSED ME! HE KISSED ME, PEETA!" She screamed. She hammered the table with her fists. . She kept yelling the same three words, and soon the whole cafeteria was quiet. Peeta had never seen her so angry. Maybe except the time when she shoved him into the vase when he first professed his love for her.

"Katniss-" He stood up and walked around the table and scooped her up into his arms and walked out of the room. He walked quickly down the halls and found a hiding place Katniss once told him about. He sat in front of her, placing his finger over her mouth and running his other hand down her dark hair. "Ssh, calm down. You're saying he kissed you?"

"Yes!" She said firmly. "Peeta, I'm sorry I'm being such a bitch… I just… I can't…. everything's been difficult right now. He can't understand the fact that people move on… he can't." Peeta nodded in agreement. "He can't let me go. I just wanted him as a friend, Peeta. He doesn't want that. And I've tried so hard to keep the relationship as friends, but won't listen. He doesn't want this happening." She pointed between herself and Peeta. Peeta felt unsure for a second. "But I do." She quickly added, seeing his expression.

"Don't call yourself a bitch. You aren't one, Katniss." Peeta reassured her. "What did you do after he kissed you?"

"I pushed him away and just stared at him. He walked away after that." Katniss wiped her mouth as if Gale's lips were still lingering on them. Peeta cupped her face. "I wouldn't leave you like that." Peeta told her, smirking. Katniss smiled back and giggled softly. "You couldn't." Peeta laughed and gave her a soft, supportive kiss.

**Thank you for the good reviews, favs and follows! I'm glad you guys are enjoying it. I try to post at least 1 chapter per week, if not more. School can always get in the way, so I'm sorry if I don't update for a week or more. I still am not sure how long this fanfic will be, but I estimate like 20-25?**

**BTW this is my first fanfic that isn't oneshot, so** **a big thank you to everyone who likes my story so far!**


	5. Chapter 5

**I don't own anything, just the fanfic but I'm guessing yawl know that by now. I'd love a lot of your guys' feedback cuz it really helps!**

"Damn it!" Peeta handed the bow back to Katniss. She was trying to teach him how to shoot. Peeta kept missing and all of his arrows had hit the wall or another target. "I don't understand how you had the patience to learn this." He spoke as he picked up his rifle again.

"Well, it was beginner's luck for me, I suppose."  
"And how old were you again? When you learn to shoot?"  
"Seven, I think. I don't remember much." Katniss shot an arrow at the target and it landed on the edge.

"Wow. Impressive." Peeta smirked as he shot a dummy in the head with a rubber bullet. Katniss rolled her eyes and gave him a smack on the elbow. Peeta laughed. "Are you trying to make me feel better?"

Katniss scoffed. "No. I just don't seem to be able to do anything today."

"Did I wear you out last night?" Peeta gave her a smile.

"Peeta." Her voice sounded like a warning, but a bit pleaded. She rolled her eyes and answered in a firm voice. "And if either one of us is worn out, it's you. You overslept two hours." Earlier, Peeta had been awoken by the sound of someone pounding on his compartment door. When he answered, it was Boggs, telling him he was late for training. Katniss had left 2 hours prior but left Peeta sleeping since he looked immensely peaceful lying in bed. They had fallen asleep tangled in each other's limbs stripped to nothing but their skin. How Peeta hated when Katniss left him alone in the mornings.

Katniss heard footsteps approach the doorway, thinking it was Boggs or Cressida. Instead, she met Gale's icy stare. Katniss backed up a little when he took a step towards her, but he stopped when he saw Peeta. She quickly turned her head and went back to shooting arrows. Gale turned and left the room.

"Who was it?" Peeta asked, looking back to where Gale was.

"Him." Katniss stated coldly.

"Oh. Have you been talking to him?" Peeta questioned. Katniss shook her head. "Not since last week." Peeta nodded. He didn't want Gale anywhere near her. He only caused tension and confusion to spark up in her and he didn't like it to see her stressed. Katniss got one of the arrows that set the target on fire, and when she was about to let go of the bow's string, she lowered her aim. And looked at the ground with an uncomfortable look on her face. Her eyes were splashed with worry.

"I'll be right back." She spoke weakly. She placed the bow and arrow on the table and almost reached the doorway. "Where are you going?" It crossed his mind she was going to apologize to Gale some more.

"I just… I'll be back in a few minutes," She trembled. Peeta ran forward and grabbed her by the wrist.

"Katniss. Are you going with Gale?" Katniss stared at him.

"What? Of course not, I just need to… Let go of me." Her voice intensified. She ran out the shooting room and out of the training centre. She ran through the halls and found the bathroom closest to the training centre. She barely made it to the toilet where she leaned over and puked. Peeta flung open the door; he knew when something was wrong with Katniss.

"Katniss!" He shouted. He quickly ran behind her and held her hair back behind her neck as he ran his free hand up and down her spine. Her body trembled as another wave a nausea overcame her.

"Peeta-" Katniss attempted to speak to him as she threw up. "I'm fine, I-" She warbled.

"Katniss, I'm not going anywhere." The puke made her throat sting as she made guttural noises that reminded Peeta of the Avoxes being tortured in the Capitol. When she finished, Peeta flushed the toilet and helped her the sink. She rinsed her mouth with cool water as Peeta used the paper towel to dry off the sweat on her neck and forehead. She looked in the mirror as she panted. That's when she noticed Peeta had grown in the past while. He easily kissed her forehead just by leaning in. Katniss turned around to face him and buried her head in his neck. Peeta felt her kiss him right where his skin met his shirt. She coughed and he heard her let out a small groan lightly. She kept whimpering as she clutched Peeta closer to her.

"You're okay, just take deep breaths, sweetheart." Peeta coaxed her as he his fingers moved along her hair. He pressed his lips against one of her closed eyes. Katniss slumped against him. He moved his shoulder to see her face. Her gray eyes looked tired. They didn't look that way before.

"Katniss," He spoke. "Did you throw up earlier today?" Katniss responded with a "mm hm"

"How come you didn't tell me?"

"It was just bile, this morning when I woke up-"

"You still should tell me about those things."

"I'm sorry, I just thought it didn't matter because it was bile."

Peeta pressed her forehead against his cheek, checking if her temperature seemed a little hot. It felt the same as always, which calmed him. He let out a puff of air.

"Let's get out of this bathroom. I'll take you to your room so you can rest okay?"

Katniss shook her head. "I'm fine, I can keep training. I need to, for next week." She, Peeta, the rest of the squad (and unfortunately, Gale) were headed to District 2.

"Take it easy. You can train tomorrow. We still have five days left."

"Peeta, I'm fine, I promise."

"You look exhausted. Let me take care of you." Peeta gave her a small smile. Katniss would obey Peeta whenever she saw that smile. She separated herself from him and held his hand.

"Okay. Lead the way."

Peeta snickered and startled her by scooping her up in his arms and she gasped. Unlike the other day, Katniss rested her head on his chest and held on to him by gripping his shoulders. He carried her half way down the compound and received some grins from the district's citizens. Saliva began to build up in Katniss' mouth. She wriggled a bit and closed her eyes, hoping the feeling would go away. Sure enough, it did.

Peeta arrived at her room and opened the door. Inside was Prim accommodating Buttercup into the blankets of her bed. She looked up at them and concerned filled her face when she saw Katniss resting in his arms. Her face looked too pale.

"What happened? Is she okay?" She sat up straight. Katniss, recognizing her sister's voice, opened her eyes to meet her blue gaze. Peeta walked to Katniss' bed and set her down. Prim moved to Katniss and observed her.

"I'm fine, I got sick during training, but I feel better now, don't worry." Katniss spoke. Peeta stroke her dark hair.

"I'm going to go back to training, okay? In the meantime, try to get some rest. You're in good hands." He looked at Prim and smiled, giving her a pat on her back. Prim smiled back and nodded. "See you two later."

Once Peeta left, Prim turned to face her sister. She was staring blankly at the wall. Prim put her hand against Katniss' forehead.  
"I don't have fever. I just ate something bad probably." Prim reached for the chair along the wall and sat on it. Buttercup had wriggled out of the blankets and was now at Prim's feet. She raised him and began to scratch him behind his ears.

"Do you need anything? Water?" Prim asked. Katniss shook her head. "No, thank you." She murmured.

"So how's training going?"

"Well, today I was a little off. Because I felt sick. But the last 3 days have been normal. And how's yours?"

"It's really interesting. I've only been given small cases, like yesterday they brought a young boy who had cuts on his legs and I had to give him stitches. But today there was a pregnant woman, but since it takes more training, I could only pass the tools to the older doctors and watch."

Katniss grinned. She was proud of her little sister. Prim had changed so much, she was no longer the weak and timid girl she was a year ago. Katniss lifted her hand and tucked a small wisp of her golden hair that had come out of her bun behind her ear.

"I'm proud of you. You know that, right?"

Prim beamed, "Yes, I know. You should rest now. I'll bring something for your stomach later, okay?"

"Okay."

Her nightmare was vivid, more vivid than any other. In fact, it wasn't much of a nightmare until the end. She dreamed that she had gotten married to Peeta before the Quarter Quell. She was truly in love with him at the time. And when the news came that she would be reaped again, she ran into the forest. But instead of stopping, she kept running. And running. The forest seemed infinite; that it would never end, and she knew that she had been running for hours in a straight line. It was midnight, she could barely see where she was going. Katniss could hear Peeta calling for her. His voice was full of fear, worry and desperation to find her. She ran towards his voice, the same straight trail she had come all the way from. Hours passed in her dream, and she knew that she had been sprinting for more than she remembered. Suddenly, Peeta's voice was all around her. Screams of anxiety, calls for help, and what scared her the most, screams of pain. She automatically recalled the jabberjays in the clock arena and she started screaming, covering her ears, hoping she would wake up.

_Wake up! _She bawled. _Wake up! It's just a dream! Wake up, please! _She begged at herself. Only that it wasn't her voice. Instead, she woke up screaming louder than ever and punching and kicking. Katniss punched a hole in the wall and kept thrashing. She could feel herself kicking something else. It wasn't the wall.

"PEETA! PEETA!" She cried. _"PEETA!" _She opened her eyes and starred up at her Peeta. His eyes were glued to hers, and he was hovering above her keeping her wrists pressed down on the bed, preventing her from kicking him. She was still under the haze of her nightmare and she continued with her insanity. Peeta was attacking her.

"PEETA, NO! PLEASE! PLEASE, NO!" Peeta was yelling at her, but she couldn't hear him. Finally she heard five words and she stopped. "It was just a dream!" Katniss paused and slowly lowered her legs and hands down to the bed. Tears were pouring from her red eyes. Once Peeta realized she was done, he released his grasp on her wrists, and she automatically wrapped her arms around his neck, sobbing. It felt like she was strangling him. Katniss pecked his lips rapidly and uncontrollably. Peeta embraced her tightly and whispered soothing words in between their kisses. With Peeta still on top of her (but hugging), the door was thrown open. Gale starred at them bewildered.


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for all the great reviews! I am really glad so many of you are enjoying my story. Again, I don't own THG.**

What he was seeing took him a second for it to register in his head. When he first came into the room, he thought the two were getting intimate. A worry swept away from his mind when he realized they were just hugging in an awkward position.

Katniss heard the door open and she looked in Gale's direction to see who it was. Her eyes widened in shock and she pulled her arms away from Peeta, making him sit up. Peeta looked at her, confused and he turned around to face Gale. Peeta's gaze reflected Gale's. Rage, irritation. Peeta got off of Katniss and stood up. She sat up frightened of what they were going to do. Just as she suspected, Peeta was the first to start this uncertain discussion.

"What brings you here? Is it her screaming?" Peeta raised his eyebrows in question. Gale opened his mouth to speak, but Peeta interrupted instantly. "Well, she's fine now. So you can get the hell out of here. Leave her alone." Gale didn't reply. Instead he looked at Katniss as she wiped her last tears away.

"Katniss-"

"Leave me alone."

He attempted to walk around Peeta, but he swiftly moved to block his way. His jaw tightened in frustration. "After what you said to her, I'd say it's better for you to forget about her and move on." He spoke through gritted teeth. Gale shoved Peeta backwards.

"What do you know about what I've said to her, huh? You think I don't know about those 'games' you two play?" Gale snapped. He pushed Peeta back again, but with more force. Katniss recognized the look on Gale's face. The face that he was about to hurt someone or something. Quickly, she jumped off the bed and pulled Peeta behind her and stood in front of Gale.

"Don't, Gale. What happened to you?" Her voice intense. "You're not who you used to be. You're not the same Gale I knew two weeks ago."

"You've changed too!" He exclaimed. He pushed her to the side. He raised a fist and was aiming for Peeta. "Ever since this son of a bitch got back, you've changed Katniss!"

"No!"

Peeta dodged Gale's fist. Katniss grabbed both his wrists and tried to drive him away, but he was stronger than her. One of his wrists struggled free of her grip, and with the force, he punched Katniss across her face. Thinking he had hit Peeta, he gave her another hard bash in her stomach. She cried out in pain, and released her other hand from his wrist and clenched her stomach. She fell to the ground. Peeta went into a fury and gave Gale a blow on his temple and kicked him until Gale scrambled out the door.

Katniss was trembling from the strong stinging sensation in her stomach. She whimpered and Peeta dropped to the floor and quickly moved her onto his lap. Thin strands of hair were caught in the blood splattered across her face from her nose.

"Katniss, you're okay. It's just a nose bleed, don't worry, you'll be fine. Take deep breaths, okay?" He held her head against his neck, leaving blood stains on his skin and shirt. He could feel her body crumple into a ball as she tried to overcome her stomach pain. "He's gone, it's okay." He held her face in his hands. "Listen to me, Katniss. Don't go near him, don't let him approach you. I don't want him anywhere near you." Katniss nodded as tears built up in her eyes. He helped her to the bathroom and cleaned her bloody face. A purple bruise was beginning to reveal itself around her cheek and upper lip. Her left eye was red, and tear continued to spill from only that eye. When the pain in her stomach subsided, she stared at the floor emotionless. Peeta lifted her chin and kissed her softly. He kissed her red eye and pulled the elastic from her braid. He ran his fingers through her braided hair, causing her hair to fall back to it's natural wavy form.

Peeta kissed her neck. Katniss pulled his head closer and toyed with his curls, kissing the top of his head. She could feel Peeta's fingers beginning to snake in between her skin and her clothes at her collar. Peeta lifted her up and headed back towards the doorway to the bedroom. He placed her down on the bed and slipped his shirt off swiftly. Katniss undid the buttons on her shirt slowly, still feeling emotionless, but turned on. Peeta helped her speed up and pulled her pants down. She kicked them off when they reached her ankles, and wrapped her legs around his waist, and lowered them so his pants fell down with her legs. A smile came to her face. Peeta mirrored her expression and settled between her legs. He couldn't wait any longer. He lowered his head and began to emit moans from her. Their lovemaking was fast. A bit too fast. He was left cradling her in his arms, calmly stroking her hair while she drew random patterns on his chest. About a minute ago they were panting hard. Peeta stopped moving his hand. Katniss looked up at him, her eyes asking why he stopped.

"You're beautiful when you come." He whispered.

Katniss blushed furiously. A shy grin came from her and she looked down at his chest. He chuckled.

"What? You don't like my compliments anymore?"

Katniss smiled. "No, I love your compliments, Peeta. It's just… I don't know. That one was weird." Peeta nodded and laughed softly. Katniss stood up.

"Where do you think you're going?" Peeta asked. Katniss turned around as she got her nightgown from the shelf next to her bed.

"I'm taking a shower. Did you really think I was going to go to sleep like this?" Katniss had almost reached the door when Peeta stopped her and held her face in his hands. Her cheek was swelling up, and her eye was still red. He tilted her head observing her bruise from different angles.

"You got worse."

"I'm okay." She pulled away from his grasp.

"No you're not. It's your eye I'm worried about. It's still red and there are still tears. Gale probably broke something in your eye," Peeta informed her. "I'm taking you to the hospital tomorrow." Katniss sighed.

"If something did break, your eye could get infected. I don't want that happening to you."

"I know." Katniss looked up at him. The end of her lips curved into a smile. "Care to join me in the shower?" Peeta smirked and closed the door behind him.


	7. Chapter 7

**I am super-duper extremely sorry if I don't update for a long time cuz I have a lot of things coming up on the calendar. I will try really hard to post new chapters ASAP every time, I promise! This is another long chapter, yo.**

The next morning, Katniss found herself having her eye poked with different tools. The doctors had numbed her eye with special eye drops, and were flashing different colored lights in her eye. Peeta watched from the side of the room, his arms crossed over his chest. The doctors found out that there was a small piece of plastic stuck in her eye. Gale probably had something on his knuckles when he punched her.

She had been asked what happened, because her bruise was now fully visible on her face. Many heads turned to Peeta suspiciously. But Katniss kept on giving everyone the same excuse that she had a nightmare and hit her head on the bed frame while thrashing. She thought it was a good one, though, since her sore hand (which was covered in scabs and bandages) was caused for that reason. While Katniss and Peeta ate lunch in the cafeteria alone, Peeta realized she wasn't eating enough. The only thing she had consumed was a quarter of this morning's breakfast and the pills that Prim gave her to calm her stomach, which helped with the pain as well. He was taken aback to the night they first got sensual. How she got mad at him for not eating. He decided to be easy on her.

"You okay? How come you aren't eating" He inquired.

Katniss shrugged. "I don't have any appetite."

"Just eat at least the bread. You're gonna need some energy for training."

Katniss looked at him. Don't make me do this. Peeta smirked. He noticed how messy her braid was. It wasn't her typical one that ended at her shoulder, instead it was a normal braid going down her back, but there were a lot of loose strands. Peeta continued eating as she stared blankly at her plate. Bored, she lifted a leg from under the table and Peeta felt her foot run on the inside of his thighs. The moment he felt the contact he froze and stared at her.

"Kat."

She giggled and dropped her foot. Despite how bad he wanted her keep going, he knew she shouldn't so he told her to stop. This was definitely not the place nor time for either of them to get aroused. When he had finished, he stood up and Katniss followed. Peeta held out his hand and she grasped it. Peeta heard a familiar laughter behind him. He already knew who it was, so he turned around smiling. Sure enough, there was Tawny.

"Hello Tawny,"

"Hi!" Tawny chimed. Katniss turned around to face pretty green eyes. Peeta looked at Katniss, who was also admiring Tawny's gaze.

"Katniss, this is Tawny. She's a friend I met the other day."

"Hello, Tawny. You're not a refugee from Twelve, are you?" Katniss asked.

"No, I'm from Thirteen," she shook her head. "Where are you guys going?"

"To the training center. We're heading to District 2 next week."

"Wow, cool! I wish I could leave the district." Tawny looked up at the dark ceiling. "It gets depressing down here. Especially when you've lived her your whole life. Even though the revolution is happening outside, I still wished I could leave. You two are really lucky, because, you've been to so many districts."

Katniss chuckled. "Yeah. I guess so."

"Can I go with you two?"

"I don't think you'd be able to. It takes a lot of training-" Peeta was cut off.

"No, not to 2!" She laughed. "I mean to the training center."

"Ooh, okay. Yeah, of course you can come." Peeta smiled. "C'mon." Tawny walked in between them, chattering the whole time about what she knew about the revolution. When the reached the center, her eyes widened in surprise at the huge arrangement of weapons and technology.

"Wow!" She chirped. "This place is HUGE!" Tawny was a well- mannered girl. She wouldn't touch any of the weapons, and no one told her she couldn't. She would watch Katniss shoot her flammable arrows, and after several minutes of Katniss noticing her sitting, watching, she walked up to her.

"Would you like me to teach you?" Katniss asked, holding out her bow. Tawny hopped off her seat automatically.

"Really? Yeah, I wanna learn!" She squealed. Katniss gave her the bow and a regular arrow. Tawny was a natural. She shot many almost-bull's-eyes, and she hit dummies directly in the heart. It amazed Katniss. And it made her feel yet better about herself that she was inspiring so many children. Peeta watched Katniss teach Tawny. It made him happy to see her interacting with younger children. He had the vision he had when he told the country about her being pregnant. Katniss standing next to his children, aligning their little hands into the right position to shoot an arrow. He couldn't help but feel a bit sad. He wondered what that unborn child would have looked like. Would he or she had had Katniss' Seam eyes, or his curls? He looked over at Katniss and Tawny again. He wanted to keep the image fresh in his mind. Katniss crouched down to Tawny's level, speaking words of advice, adjusting her hands into the right spots on the bow.

Peeta volunteered to take Tawny back to her compartment. When he left, Katniss kept shooting. She was nervous to be going to District Two. But unlike 7, she would have Peeta to comfort her. Katniss recognized the sound she suddenly heard. The sound of shoes with rubber soles squeaking on the tiled floor. It wasn't Peeta. She would recognized the 'beat' the person was walking in. Prepared for whatever he could throw at her, she turned around. Just as she suspected, Gale strolled in and grabbed her by the shoulders, and one hand trailed up her neck to try and see her bruise. Katniss struggled free of his grip and pulled her head away from his hand

"NO! Don't touch me, Gale!" She yelled, stepping back.

"I just wanted to apologize-"

"Apology not accepted; please, Gale, leave. Me. Alone." Katniss' eyes began to sting with tears. She was frustrated. A little too frustrated. _Why am I over exaggerating? It was an accident. Don't cry…. Stop crying, Katniss_. "I don't want you near me."

"Katniss, I'm sorry." He whispered angrily. "It'll never happen again. I was overreacting, I shouldn't have threatened Peeta like that. I didn't mean to hurt you."

"You meant to hurt HIM!" She exclaimed. "Stop saying sorry, I won't forgive you, don't talk to me unless it's an emergency while we're in 2."

"What do I have to do?" He sighed.

"To what? To accomplish what, Gale?" It took her second. "I DON'T WANT YOU! We were never meant to be lovers! Why can't you see that?! I'm in love with Peeta!"

"You don't mean that." He spoke through clenched teeth. He approached her. "Please tell me you don't mean that, Katniss."

"I love him." She whispered in a way that sounded as if she wanted to wound him even more. Tears fell from her eyes. "I love him. I love Peeta. I love him so much." Katniss quickly muttered under her breath. "The games we play. I. ."

"Katniss, stop it!" He grabbed her by the shoulders. Bad idea, he told himself. She went on a rampage, screaming, kicking, until she finally reached a knife from the weapon table. She pointed it straight at him. She was panting hard, small parts of her hair stuck to her tear-streaked cheeks. Something was wrong with her. She was having huge mood swings from what he remembered since last week.

"Katniss, calm down. I'm leaving now. Shh." He walked around her slowly. When she felt his presence disappear, she dropped the knife. It clattered and she dashed out of the training centre, going down the opposite hall from where Gale had gone down. She felt it too. There was something wrong with her. She didn't feel right. Katniss sprinted down the hall and found an old hiding spot. She drew her knees close to her chest and kept cringing about everything. She knew Peeta would find her quickly. And sure enough, he did, after only 7 minutes. He gasped when he saw her crying.

"It was Gale, wasn't it?"

She nodded and began to sob again. The nausea returned and she felt frightened. She reached for Peeta's neck, telling him that she wanted him to pick her up. "Something's wrong with me," She cried. "Something's wrong with me!" She explained to him how she basically threatened Gale with a knife. Peeta would silence her and wiped her tears away. They went to dinner but half way through, Katniss claimed she felt sick. She ran down to the bathroom and Peeta chased after her. She cried some more back at the room.

"Katniss, you should go back with your mother and Prim. You haven't spent much time with them." Katniss, not wanting to argue, nodded in agreement. Peeta walked her to her old room (because Peeta's room was really her room now as well.)

"Katniss," Her mother gasped. "Honey, are you alright?" Katniss shook her head and walked into the room and Prim quickly made her sit down. Her mother looked back at Peeta.

"She threw up again?" She asked. Peeta nodded. "She hasn't been feeling well. I might have to talk to Coin about changing the 'fieldtrip' to two weeks from now maybe." Katniss perked up as she heard Peeta.

"No, no, Peeta." She disagreed, "I'll be fine by tomorrow, I promise."

Peeta sighed. "We'll just have to see, okay?" Before he turned around and left, Katniss got up from where Prim had her sit. She walked slowly towards him and gave him a soft, long kiss. Peeta held her at the waist and kissed her back. He enjoyed the gentle feeling of her soft kisses. He then brought her in for a hug and whispered directly into her ear.

"Nothing's wrong with you. You're just as beautiful and perfect as I've always remembered."


	8. Chapter 8

**Okay, so the summary of the story is gonna kick off 4real in this chapter. I have a feeling that many of you know what's happened. Btw, I am going to skip the whole District 2 part because I don't have an idea of how to change it into my own storyboard (and I won't copy it all 'cause I don't do plain plagiarism :-P). So yeah I don't own Los Juegos Del Hambre. (THG)**

He ran through the crowds of District 2 citizens dashing towards Katniss. A mixture of thoughts sped through his mind. He couldn't believe what he just saw.

"KATNISS!" He screamed. The man who had shot her turned around and sped towards a house. Peeta shot a bullet at his head and with a sharp cry of pain the man fell to his knees, dead. Peeta could feel hot tears running down his cheeks as he got closer to her body. He slid onto the road, causing a cloud of dust to envelope him and Katniss's body. He scooped her up into his arms and pulled her onto his lap, his hands shaking as he tore off her vest which was supposed to be bullet proof.

"Oh my god… oh my god… no, no…" He mumbled. He could see her blood seeping through her jacket around her left rib. He gasped for air while his tears fell onto her pale face. He put his fingers to her neck and felt warmth, but it wasn't enough to convince him. He lifted her more at the chest and put his ear against her heart. He could still hear the steady beat. He released his breath and put her head in his lap and brushed away strands of hair. He heard footsteps approach him, and he turned, aiming his rifle. It was Boggs and Cressida.

"Is she alive?" Cressida shouted as the screams from the crowd grew louder. He nodded quickly. "Let's move back to the hovercraft! Katniss has been shot!" She spoke into the radio.

Peeta lifted her limp body up, running towards the hovercraft's open door. The rest of the squad ran up the ramp and buckled into their seats as the hover craft lifted off the ground. Boggs took out an oxygen mask and a tank and placed it over Katniss' nose and mouth. Her slow breath fogged up the plastic mask. They unzipped her jacket and he handed Peeta a bandage and medical tape. He helped him place it over her wound. Boggs checked her back to see if the bullet had gone out the other end. But there was no hole; the bullet was lodged in her.

Peeta held her close to his chest for the rest of the trip and made sure the mask kept clouding up with her breath. Gale starred at them. He was worried too. Knowing Katniss wouldn't want him to approach her, he didn't

Screaming filled the room. Katniss realized it was her, waking from a nightmare. She looked around, realizing she was in the hospital again. She lifted her fingers to feel oxygen tubes beneath her nose. Haymitch was sitting across the room in a chair.

"Hello, sweetheart." He gave her his typical grin.

"What…happened?" Katniss moved and felt pain stab her ribcage. "Where's Peeta? Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he's outside. Talking to the doctors. Actually, he's the one who was asking if you were okay. You got shot while you were out in 2." Katniss pressed her fingers to the thickest part of the bandage and felt another wave of pain and her face contracted.

"Tell me. Do you still feel sick? They left a bowl for you just in case."

Katniss shook her head. "I haven't felt sick for a few days now. I think the pills Prim gave me worked." Haymitch nodded at her response.

"I don't think it was any kind of food poisoning or anything. It lasted too long. Katniss," His voice serious. "While they were hooking you up to the machines and everything…" He paused and looked up at her eyes. She looked worried.

"What?" Her voice trembled.  
"They performed a blood test on you."

"That's it?" _I've lost enough blood already. What does it matter? _ She scoffed. Haymitch rolled his eyes and moved his chair closer to her bed.

"No, Katniss. They found… some news. They had to take some samples of Peeta's DNA." He sighed. "And, well, it's confirmed." Katniss' face was drained of color. _No. _She thought. _This can't be real it was… _"You're expecting. Want to tell me about it, sweetheart?"

Katniss stared at him for a long time. She didn't blink. She didn't move. _Peeta. Look what we've done. _"They're not happy with you. Coin said that you were taking shots, and that Peeta started taking them two weeks ago." Katniss opened her mouth but Haymitch stopped her. "But the question is, Katniss, are you sure you got them on the right days? Because it doesn't look like you did." Katniss stared blankly at him. She stuttered, trying to find the right words. Haymitch could see tears. "Hey… hey." He gave her a tissue. She didn't bother using it.

"I didn't mean too…" She whispered. "I never meant to bring a child into the war! I never meant to!" She cried. _"_Where's Peeta? I need to… to… get him for me, please…" She whimpered. Haymitch got up and left her room and after a minute Peeta came in, his face full of worry. He walked up to her bed and crouched down to reach her eye level. She placed her hand over top of his. "Peeta…" She muttered. "I never wanted this to happen. Not now especially." Peeta laid down on her bed and embraced her. She spoke quietly. "I… I'm sorry." Peeta looked down at her tear-stained face. "I was being so… so…foolish, I didn't take my shot after you came, I forgot to."

"Shh. Katniss... I forgive you. I'm not mad. I'm… just a little scared. We'll make it through this."

"I'm scared too. I don't want to bring a child into the world, I can't." She broke into sobs. "Anytime but now… Peeta, I'm going to lose our baby."_ Not with the revolution; I can't raise his child._ "And… I can't…. won't be able to cope with that happening. If I…" Peeta lifted her chin and removed her oxygen tubes. His eyes showed sadness. He wouldn't be able to cope with his own child's death. He placed a finger over her lips and kissed her ever so softly, smoothing back her long bangs.

"I'll be right here. I won't let anything bad happen to you." He moved the blanket down and brought his head to her abdomen. He planted a kiss against the fabric of Katniss' hospital gown. "Or you."

_I've held your hand through all of these years_

_And you'll still have_

_All of me._


	9. Chapter 9

Katniss walked slowly down the path, keeping her loaded bow pointed at the ground. She could hear rustling noises all around her, but for some reason she couldn't raise her bow. Mockingjays crooned around her, whistling different tunes from songs Katniss knew. The Hanging Tree, the Valley Song, and the song she sang to Rue as she passed her last breaths. The songs continued and soon and then they faded. It was all quiet and the mockingjay's songs turned into monitor beeps. She woke up, her eyes still heavy with morphling and sleeping gas. The oxygen tubes were back in her nose, this time taped to her cheeks. She extended her fingers against the soft blankets, trying to feel for Peeta.

"Peeta…" she whispered. Katniss moved her head to see if he was in the room. It was only her, though. Nothing but the monitor was making a sound. She looked over at the tube that gave her the vitamins she needed. The nausea was coming back, and she felt like the vitamins were making it worse. Hesitantly, Katniss ripped the tape off the top of her hand and took out the needle. She reached for the pale beige bowl sitting on the table next to her bed. She put it under chin and closed her eyes and took deep breaths. _What would you make me throw up anyways? _She spoke to her baby through her mind. _I haven't eaten anything. _

Katniss resulted in puking bile as she suspected. Her gurgles called attention and a nurse came in.

"Are you alright, Katniss?" Katniss nodded weakly. She walked up to her bed and took her bowl. "I'll clean this for you. Would you like to see Peeta?" Her eyes widened at his name.

"Y-yes… please." She answered. The nurse bowed her head and left her room. Katniss relaxed her head against her pillow and exhaled. She fell asleep in Peeta's arms so easily last night. She didn't even notice when her eyelids dropped. The door opened and Peeta closed it behind him quietly. "Hey," he gave her a comforting smile.

"Why did you leave this morning?" Katniss inquired.

"Oh. Um, they were showing me the… charts and pictures. And stuff." He sounded embarrassed. "Do you feel better than yesterday?"

"Mm hm."

"Looks like someone's had mood swings," Peeta walked over to her bed and sat down on the chair next to it. Katniss looked at him confused. "Doctors said it was a side effect of being pregnant."

"Oh. That explains a lot."

"Certainly. It does."

After a moment of silence, Katniss spoke.

"Can I see the pictures?" She said quietly.

"Yeah. Of course." Peeta stood up and opened the door. He walked to the main desk and asked for the pictures. The man at the desk nodded and took Katniss' medical record folder out of a file cabinet and took out three black and white pictures and gave them to him. Katniss was trembling when Peeta left. She tried to keep her breathing slow. She could feel her skin crawling. She wanted to see the pictures and she had to admit; she was excited, but at the same time, she was scared and didn't want to see their 'creation'.

_This is strange. The pregnancy wasn't supposed to be real. It was just something Peeta said to keep us and our families safe. _Her eyes focused on her heart monitor. _Oh, Peeta. What have we done? _She felt a strange sensation in her stomach that was a mix of excitement and anxiety when the doorknob was twisted and Peeta came in with the images in hand. Katniss felt her pulse quicken and it even sounded on the monitor. Peeta quickly came to her and placed the photos on the table and calmed her down.  
"Katniss, it's okay, don't be afraid." He purred. "Here." The beeping slowed down when he showed her the first picture. Her gray eyes widened. Despite how undetailed it all looked, it still amazed her. A tiny little figure that stood out from the blackness. Peeta watched her reaction as her eyes grazed every small detail of not only the baby but the other random shapes and figures. Another one of the shapes caught her eyes but it wasn't as drawing as the baby, or what was going to be a baby. Hopefully.

"So… what are those other things supposed to be?" She inquired.  
"Those little things?" Peeta pointed at the shapes.

"Yeah."

"Doctors said they were just… um… that. Stuff. Leftovers."

Katniss nodded. "Oh." She gasped. Her giggled became fits of laughter. "OOOH!" She covered her mouth with the back of her hand and set down the pictures. Peeta started to chuckle, embarrassed. _Whatever. _He laughed whenever she did. Katniss opened her eyes and could see his cheeks flushed pink from awkwardness. She let her laughs come out and buried her head in Peeta's chest. The door opened and Haymitch walked in. Seeing Katniss laugh, he started to do so too, but milder. "What's up? When did you start thinking positive, sweetheart?" Katniss heard him but didn't stop. Instead, it was Peeta who showed the 'don't' face.

"She's just laughing about the pictures."

"Why? Because of how disastrous this baby already looks with your guys' genes combined?" With that, Katniss stopped and looked up at him with an icy stare. "Whoa." He held up his hands. "Easy." Katniss sighed and scooted closer to Peeta. He wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her head. "I guess you could convince Snow a bet easier." Katniss shifted her gaze from Peeta's legs to Haymitch's Seam eyes. Her grey eyes were calm now.

"Let's see how your baby's looking." Katniss passed him the pictures and then rested her hands on Peeta's thighs. Haymitch flipped through them, taking closer looks. Katniss then felt like it was huge invasion of her privacy. After all, everyone was seeing her insides by looking at the pictures. She then decided she would only show family other than Haymitch. And of course, Peeta.

"How old is she?" She whispered quietly to Peeta.

"She? So you think it's a she?"

"Answer me."

"I think the doctors said three weeks."

"So… it happened the night that I got mad at you?"

One side of Peeta's lips curved into a smile. "It appears so. She was like… the calm after the storm."

"And it's for sure that she's okay? Even after taking Prim's pills and Gale hurting me?"  
"She's fine. Yeah. I could hear her heartbeat."

Katniss smiled. "I wanna hear someday."

"And someday you will." Peeta closed his eyes and smiled. He opened them again and looked down to meet her silver gaze. "You'll love it."  
"Nice." Haymitch gave the pictures back to Katniss. "Looks like it's mother already." He pinched Katniss' cheek gently. Katniss smacked his hand away and wrapped her arms tightly around Peeta and closed her eyes. "Alright. Well. I'll be leaving."

"Bye, Haymitch." Peeta moved into Katniss' bed.

Haymitch nodded and left. Peeta pressed his forehead against Katniss and kissed her. She ran her fingers through his hair and nuzzled her nose against his.

_Peeta is mine. And I am his. _

….

_Cause in a sky full of stars_

_I think I saw you_

**Yes I used a quote of Katniss' but made it into Peeta being hers instead of Gale. Don't forget to leave a review (they are a great help to me)!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you for the reviews! I decided that I'm gonna give Katniss' mother a name because I don't want to be all "Katniss' mother" or "her mother" or "their mother" all the time, so I'll name her Lily in some parts.**

The door knob clicked and Katniss' mother, Lily, entered. Katniss opened her eyes, and as if she already knew who it was, she sat up quickly and faced her aging blue eyes. The look on her face showed she was worried, but confused. Peeta had left a few minutes prior, like he already knew they were coming.

"Before you say anything…" Katniss began. "I wanna say sorry. If I disappointed you." Katniss peeled the tape off of her cheeks and pulled the oxygen tubes off of her nose and from behind her ears. Her mother approached her and sat down in the chair. She cupped her cheek.

"Why didn't you tell me that you and Peeta-"

"I wouldn't be able to share that with you. I wouldn't share that with anyone. Why would I? What difference would it have made?"

"I remember you saying that Coin was forcing you to take injections, though. How…?"

"I forgot to take them a week after Peeta came. I just got caught up with looking after him that I forgot about myself. I'm sorry." Katniss informed her.

"I don't know exactly what to think, or say, Katniss." Lily made her sit up and embraced her. "But I want you to know that Prim and I are here for you. We'll help you and Peeta. Because I know… that you two want this child alive."

Katniss nodded. "Thank you…" She whispered.

"How's your wound doing?" Lily asked.

"Its fine, I think. I haven't checked, but it feels better. When can I leave the hospital?"

"I'd say one more day. You still need your oxygen."

"Alright." Katniss nodded. "Prim?"

"She's in school."  
"Oh. Right."

"I'll tell her to come by later if you want." Her mother suggested.

"Yeah, sure."

...

Lily was called to help a patient and the moment she left Katniss' room, Peeta peeked his head in playfully.

"Is she gone?"

Katniss laughed. "Yeah, she's gone. C'mere, you." She held her arms out and Peeta nestled into her bed next to her. "You know you'll have to confront her someday. You can't walk away from this."

"I know." He kissed the crown of her head. "I won't. I have a feeling she'll be mad or something. Plus, it'd be awkward, because she had no idea… about… us… you know."

"She wasn't mad just now. She said she'd help us. I bet she's just a little confused that it actually happened."

Peeta sighed and looked down at her flat stomach. "Tell me. Do I need to apologize for anything?" Katniss instantly faced him with a shocked face.

"No." She shook her head "No. It wasn't your fault. We can make it through this together. I want to have this baby. It'd be better if I wasn't pregnant… but despite how big of a struggle this'll be, I'm going to try. For us. Peeta, I don't regret anything that happened that night." Peeta smiled and recalled the memory.

"I love you so much, Katniss."

"I know you do, Peeta. And I love you too."

…

The night passed by fast and Katniss woke up early at 6:00 to quietness. The monitors weren't on anymore. The tubes that were attached to her arm were replaced by cotton balls and medical tape. She felt weight around her lower stomach. Curiously, she lifted her head and saw a sight she'd never seen before.

Peeta had his head leaning against her stomach, and his hand over where their baby would be. She noticed he was awake. She grinned slightly.

Only that it wasn't 100% quiet.

She could hear whispering. Peeta was whispering.

_But to who? To himself? _Katniss listened closely and began to make out words. Then she realized who he was talking to. Not himself. Not Katniss. But the baby. She descried to stay still and pretend she was still asleep. She wanted to listen.

"I'll protect you." He whispered. "I won't let anyone hurt you or your mother. I love you both too much to let that happen." Slowly, a smile crept upon her face as she kept listening.

"You know," He paused. "You're lucky. You're gonna have an amazing mother. I can't wait to meet you, even though there's still a long time until you arrive." Peeta planted a kiss on Katniss' stomach and moved his hand. She giggled because it tickled. Knowing Peeta realized she was awake, she reached down and combed her fingers through his hair. He looked up at her and smiled. "Good morning, beautiful."

"Hey."

"Were you listening?"

Katniss raised her eyebrows in question. "No. I just woke up like 2 seconds ago. Were you talking to her?"

"Yes. I thought of name."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah. What do you think of 'Nerine'? It's a type of flower."

Katniss nodded slightly. "It sounds nice." She chuckled and smoothed back his hair. "Do you want a girl? I don't really mind if it's a boy or a girl."

"A little Katniss would be lovely."

_I fell in love with a beautiful girl_

_And she still takes my breath away._

**I'd like to thank some of my friends for giving me a few ideas! Again, thank you for reviews! BTW, the name 'Nerine' is pronounced "Nah- ray- nee".**


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter eleven! Wow this fanfic has been a huge success for me I'm glad so many of you are liking it!**

There was a knock at the door. Peeta stood up and answered it, and there stood Prim. She was holding a District 13 outfit and a needle.

"Hi, Peeta. How's Katniss doing?" She asked as she walked around him. Peeta had told Katniss to go back to sleep, and now she was resting peacefully.

"She's doing a lot better." Peeta brushed strands of Katniss' hair away from her forehead. "She said the nausea went away."

"Oh. That's good. Did she stop taking the pills I gave her? Because I don't think it's good to keep taking them. It might be bad for the… um… baby." Prim tried to be mature at the thought that she was speaking about her sister's pregnancy with the boy who was the father.

"Yeah, she stopped taking them." Peeta sighed. Prim placed the clothing on the chair. Peeta turned his attention back to the needle Prim was holding. "What's that for?" He pointed at her hand. Prim lifted her hand to give Peeta a better look. The needle was attached to a small test tube.

"I was instructed to come here because she needs another blood test."

"Oh. Okay. Should I wake her up?" He asked. Prim bowed her head. "That'd be nice. We don't want her waking up like this is a nightmare, do we?" She smiled. Peeta smiled back.

"Nope." Peeta came to her side and nudged Katniss gently. Her eyes flickered open. She looked up at Peeta and then down to her sister. "Hey, Primmy." Katniss reached out to grasp her hand and Prim obediently did so. "Hi. I was told you needed another blood test, so I had Peeta wake you."

"Oh." Peeta helped her sit up and Prim took an elastic band out of the pouch on her dress and wrapped it around Katniss's upper arm. Katniss clenched her fist and Prim inserted the needle. Katniss was used to all the blood tests. She watched the test tube fill with her blood and then Prim told her she was free to leave the hospital and told her about the clothes she left for her. Katniss thanked Prim and she ran off.

Katniss hopped out of her bed and picked up the drab grey jumpsuit. She slipped one arm out of one of her hospital gown's sleeves and she turned around. Peeta was staring at her. Katniss twirled a finger. "Turn around." Peeta grinned and did as she asked.

"C'mon, I've seen you naked like five times, Kat." He heard her scoff.

"Well it's time I change without any eyes on me." She teased. Peeta turned his head a little and caught a peek of her slipping the jumpsuit over her shoulders. "Pervert." She laughed.

Katniss changed out of her hospital gown and put on the jumpsuit. She slipped on her shoes that were left next to her bed. She walked up to him and clutched his hand. Peeta opened the door and the two left the hospital. Katniss got a different kind of breakfast compared to everyone else's. Along with her turnips, she got a lot of greens. Apparently it was a meal that every pregnant woman received. Katniss suddenly felt the urge to speak to Coin and explain to her what happened. "I need to go to Coin." Katniss stood up. "To ask her about how this will all go." Peeta stood up too.  
"Do you want me to go?" Katniss shook her head.

"I'll go by myself. Meet me at the training centre, okay?"

"Okay."

…

Katniss walked across the compound and found the door to the meeting room closed. She looked through the small window on the door and saw Coin speaking with Haymitch, Plutarch and Boggs. Hesitantly, she knocked and Boggs answered the door.

"Miss. Everdeen." He bowed his head. "Please. Come in." Katniss walked through the doorway and crossed her arms over her chest protectively. She looked at Coin and sat down next to Haymitch.  
"How nice." Coin spoke. "I was about to tell Boggs to get you. You came here voluntarily, but I assume you know why we were going to get you." Katniss nodded. "We have several concerns for this revolution, now, obviously. But first, I'd like for you to explain how shots to prevent pregnancy didn't work on you." Coin obviously knew the answer. Katniss sat up straight.

"Well. When Peeta returned, I got concerned with his well-being so I forgot about myself."

"You forgot to take the shots?" Plutarch asked. Katniss nodded. "Yes. I did."

Coin nodded in agreement.

"And you do see the way carrying a child will affect your role in this revolution, correct?" Coin questioned. Katniss began to lose patience again. "Yes, I do." She said with an angrier tone.

"How?"

Coin was clearly mad at her.

"Isn't it obvious enough? I bet everyone in this room knows the answers to your questions." Coin glared at her. "Just tell me why exactly you guys wanted me here in the first place." Katniss demanded.

"We brought you here to tell you why we might need to change things up." Katniss looked at Plutarch confused. _Change things up? _"Our Mockingjay being pregnant causes many problems, Katniss." Plutarch told her. "If the nation finds out, we'll lose a lot of the power we've already gained. We need you as strong as ever now. If this war causes you to lose your baby it could weaken both our strongest soldiers." _Peeta and I._

Katniss realized that everything Plutarch had said where points that she had already thought about. "I still don't understand." She said in a frustrated tone. "All the things you just told me would be something you'd say before; to prevent me from getting knocked up. But in case you haven't noticed, I'm already pregnant! So this doesn't matter! It's too late to be telling me about this!" She cried.

"Katniss," Haymitch warned.

"Miss. Everdeen." Coin spoke calmly. "At the position we stand in at the moment, we can't have you back down if you lose this baby later in the war. We're going to have to force you to keep going no matter what happens,"

Katniss tried to control her breathing.

"Which brings me to this." Coin opened a drawer to take out an object. In front of Katniss she placed an orange medication container filled with pills.


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you for all the great reviews! So by the looks of it, I think this story is gonna be more than 15-20 chapters long. I'm guessing 25- 30 now. THG isn't mine.**

Peeta figured that the meeting had taken too long. It had been a little over an hour and a half and Katniss had not arrived at the training centre. Peeta was worried. He had been training with Finnick and keeping good track of time.

"I'm going to go find Katniss. I'll see you later Finnick." Peeta decided.

"Alright. See you."

He left the training center and as he walked down the hallways he began to think about where Katniss could be if not around the headquarters. _She probably got scared again. _She could be anywhere. If she was scared, it was likely she was trying to calm herself down in a hiding place. Peeta searched in the place where she liked to hide the most, in a huge closet filled with cleaning supplies.

Nothing.

He searched in the lower levels of District 13 but was told by a citizen that monitored the area that she hadn't been seen for a while. He decided there was only one other place where she could be. Her room. Peeta ran through the hallways, and reached her compartment. The door knob was locked so he decided to knock. No answer.

"Katniss?" He said. He pressed his ear against the door to check if he could hear anything. Instead he received the greeting of silence. _Where did you go? _In his head he ran through lists of other places she could hiding. If she was frightened, she wouldn't hide anywhere near the headquarters. Finnick told him that she would hide in areas nearby the hospital when she was ill like in unoccupied surgery rooms. Finnick also said that a nurse once found her trembling in tears under her hospital bed after she went missing for almost six hours. She wouldn't be in the hospital right now either. All he wanted to do was find her and comfort her. If she wasn't in her room, she was in someone else's.

Peeta turned around and walked a few steps down the hall and stood in front of his room's door. Hesitantly, he quietly opened the door. He took a step and heard the unmistakable sound of her whimpers. He found her huddled against the wall, curled up. Peeta could see by the way her arms were bent that she was clutching something. Maybe her stomach. Peeta closed the door gently and slowly walked towards her. She didn't even hear him come in. She kept crying and trembling, whispering to herself or to the baby that "It's okay". Peeta observed her. The braid she previously had in her hair was messy and big strands of hair were hanging out of it. Her arm would move suddenly and he could hear a small rattling sound. He wondered what she was holding.

He felt his stomach drop. He immediately shortened the space towards them and startled her. "Peeta?!" He tore her arms away from her body and found the container with pills. He seized them and his mouth dropped open. Katniss looked up alarmed and felt guilt when she faced him. She could see tears clouding up his blue eyes.

"Katniss," he whispered observing the labels on the bottle. "You…how could you?"

"No, Peeta!" She cried. "It's not what it looks like, I swear!" She slipped off the bed and grabbed his wrists. Peeta turned away from her and read the labels over and over again.

"Peeta, please look at me!" She begged and knocked the pills out of his hands. She cupped his cheeks and then they were staring into each other's eyes, both red from tears. Katniss lowered her tone. "Look at me." She murmured. "I didn't take them, I swear. Nerine's okay…" She assured him.  
"Then why did you get them? Why, Katniss?" He inquired. Katniss took a deep breath.

"I didn't get them, they were given to me by-"

"Gale?!"  
"No! No, of course not, he would never do that! Peeta…" She pressed her index finger against his lips to stop his heavy breathing. "Shh… it was Coin. She thought that it would be better for me to give up the baby rather than lose it in battle." Peeta's eyes reflected anger.

"That bitch." He said under his breath. "She doesn't understand. One. Fucking. Bit, that bitch." Katniss put her hands around the back of his neck. "Promise me, Katniss. Please, promise me you won't take the pills." Katniss stared at him with tears still running down her cheeks. She didn't respond. "Katniss…?" He whispered. _Say something. _She mouthed his name. And he could see her just barely shake her head.

"Katniss, no." His voice intensified. "No, Katniss, please." He held her face in his hands.

"She has a point!" She bawled. "Would you rather have me lose her?!" Peeta clutched Katniss against his chest and buried his hand in her messy hair. He pressed his lips against her forehead while she cried into his shoulder.

"No she doesn't! Katniss, we have try, we have to. Please! Don't give up on our child. I can't lose her. At least not without us trying to save her." He begged. Katniss continued to cry and Peeta lifted her chin. She brought her face close to his and ghosted her lips over his, as if she was asking for Peeta to forgive her. "Can you do that? For me? For us," Peeta pleaded. He placed his hand over her belly. "For her." He wiped her tears away kissed her nose. "Please." He looked deep into her ashy eyes which were filled with guilt.

"I'll try." She mumbled. Peeta suddenly felt hope spark up in his heart again.

"So you promise me?" He brushed a small lock of her hair away from her tear-stained face.

"Yes, Peeta. I promise," She hugged him tightly and buried her head in his neck. "I promise." She repeated. Katniss took into hand how much she would hurt Peeta if she took the pills. And herself. She would feel remorse, over and over again, about not accepting the baby. She and Peeta had to try. He placed a hand on her stomach again and brought her in for a soothing kiss. She kissed him back and rested her hand over top of his and threaded her fingers through his golden hair. How she loved doing this to him. Katniss knew that messing with his curls drove him crazy, and made him stimulated sometimes (ever since the first night of their intimacy). Peeta pulled away from the kiss slowly and held her gaze.

…

When night fell, the two headed back to Peeta's room. They got into their nightclothes and Peeta was the first to jump into the bed and extend his arms. Katniss slid under the covers with her back facing him. Peeta pressed himself closer to her and swathed a leg over her waist. He wrapped his arms around her, both hands resting on her belly. They laid there in silence until Katniss turned her head slightly and brought her arm around the back of his head and pulled him in for a kiss. The kisses they had shared lately had all been gentle and easy- going, unlike any of the passionate ones they shared in the second arena or before they found out Katniss was carrying a baby.

"Go to sleep." Peeta said between the kisses. "My two favorite people need some rest." Katniss parted her lips from his but held him close. Peeta gripped her chin and nuzzled his nose against hers. Katniss giggled and gave him one last peck. She then turned around and fell asleep in his protective arms. That night Katniss dreamed of a little girl. The girl would run through a meadow with the evening sun painting the land gold. She looked around eight and Katniss kept following her through the field, not knowing who she was. After a few minutes of the girl running and giggling, she turned around to face Katniss. She stopped, and realized that the girl she had been chasing looked familiar. She had the same wavy dark hair and olive skin.

It was Katniss, but when she was a child. Looking at her made Katniss scared all of a sudden. Her curious smile was replaced by a confused frown, and her younger self mirrored her expression. Young Katniss' face suddenly turned into a scared look and she turned and ran away. Hesitantly, Katniss chased after her, telling her to stop, until her younger self tripped and fell. Katniss approached her and kneeled down to help her, and the young Katniss was in tears, screaming and trying to get away from her older self's grasp. She demanded Katniss to stop, telling her to leave her alone. What made Katniss let her go was when her 8- year old self started screaming for Peeta. _Peeta? _The girl screamed hysterically for Peeta until Katniss could see him. Far off in the distance, running towards them. And it was present-day Peeta. Even though he looked a little older. He quickly reached them and scooped little Katniss up into his arms. Peeta starred at Katniss as if he didn't know who she was. She starred back at him. Her younger self turned to face Katniss with tears coming down her cheeks.

That's when Katniss realized it wasn't her. The girl had blue eyes.

**I love your reviews! AND more than ****50 FOLLOWERS**** ON HITPWILY! Thank you all so much.**


	13. Chapter 13

**I don't own the Hunger games**

Katniss woke with a jolt when she heard Peeta's morning alarm go off. Peeta lifted his head off her chest and reached the alarm and hit snooze. After the beeping stopped, he laid his head back down where it was previously and snuggled closer to Katniss' body, trying to find sleep again. She, on the other hand, was wide awake. She smoothed back Peeta's hair. She pressed her lips against his soft curls and breathed in a faint smell of District 13's shampoo. Peeta moaned and raised his head slightly so his nose was touching her neck. His grip on her waist tightened.

"Peeta," She whispered against his head. No response. She chuckled quietly and kept running her fingers along his hair. Katniss couldn't remember what her dream was about exactly. She only remembered it was vivid, and it was probably because of her pregnancy. Katniss moved her head slightly to get a glimpse of her Peeta sleeping. He always looked so calm and happy when he slept.

She could spend hours watching him. She knew she couldn't lie here all day with District 13's tight schedules. Katniss moved Peeta slightly so she could get out from under him. She got a clean shirt and pants and headed to the bathroom to take a shower. She looked down at her stomach constantly, pondering of when the bump would be noticeable.

Katniss quickly finished and left the bathroom. Peeta was still sleeping on the bed. She smiled and walked up to the bed and placed a kiss on his lips. He woke with a jump and when noticed it was her, he closed his eyes again. He brought her closer and kissed her back.

"Aw. You already showered?" He picked a piece of her damp hair and twirled it around his index finger. Katniss nodded and then smiled when she realized why he asked. "You've been limiting me to you lately. Is it because of the baby?" He asked. Katniss shrugged.

"If we get foolish more often it will get less fun." Peeta nodded at her response and kept playing with her wet hair. He brought a strand up to his nose and inhaled the strong scent of lavender. "Mm. True." He stretched across the bed and at the same time spoke. "How's she doing?"

"Good." Katniss replied.

"Have you felt her move or anything?"

"No. I would have told you. Plus it's only been three weeks, Peeta." Peeta smiled for no reason. "You should go shower."

"I should." Peeta agreed and hopped off the bed and gathered his clothes. He got in the bathroom and Katniss made the bed. Then she laid there, staring at the ceiling. Thinking about the baby, like always. She was still grateful that Coin had rescheduled their trip to the Capitol before she was assigned the pills, to help her a little. At least Coin had some heart, but Katniss couldn't trust her after what she did. Neither could Peeta.

What would Coin do if she found out Katniss turned down the pills? Obviously she wouldn't be able find another Mockingjay. Unless… maybe Peeta?

Peeta opened the door of the bathroom and he saw Katniss taking a nap on the bed. He smiled and placed his mouth by her ear. "Katniss," He whispered. She quickly opened her eyes and sat up.

"Are you ready to go?" Katniss asked as she rustled his damp hair with her fingers.  
"Yes." He said, and stole a kiss from her.

…

After breakfast, Katniss and Peeta were being informed about the Capitol plan with Boggs, Plutarch, Cressida, Messala, Pollux, Castor, Beetee and Finnick.

And Gale.

Peeta kept her hand in his, their fingers intertwined. Katniss observed Gale for most of the meeting. She had to admit that she missed him. She still needed a friend who knew her well, compared to Johanna or Finnick. Everyone seemed to know about the baby- except maybe Gale. From what went on at the meeting, it appeared as if Plutarch and Boggs thought she had taken the pills (only Boggs and Plutarch because they were the only ones in the current meeting who were there at the time when Katniss was given the pills). But she knew they would find out soon. From the corner of her eye, Katniss could see Gale was also keeping a close eye on her. There were a few times where Katniss looked over at him and their eyes met for a split millisecond.

After she and Gale shared a look the third time- the longest, she looked down and didn't look up for the rest of the meeting. Katniss began to fidget with Peeta's fingers and he noticed after about 10 minutes of her not stopping. He pressed his lips against her temple. "Are you okay, Kat?" He murmured.

"Yeah." She replied in a low whisper. He wrapped an arm around her mid torso and pressed her body closer to his. She felt Peeta kiss the side of her head and return his attention to Plutarch.

Plutarch mostly spoke about how the plan was all going to work out. Peeta paid close attention to what he said, knowing that Katniss wasn't listening and was drifting off and thinking about the baby like she always did. He caught Gale eyeing at Katniss. Peeta could see confusion wash over him several times along with guilt and worry. _When are you going to leave her alone? When are you going to take into account that she's moved on? Or at least trying to? _The meeting ended and everyone was getting up from their seats and heading towards the doorway.

"Katniss, Peeta." Plutarch said. "I'm going to need you two to stay back for a few more minutes." Katniss told herself to stay calm and turned around to take her seat again. Peeta nodded in approval and sat her back down next to him. Plutarch sat down across from them on the table and sorted his papers.  
"I'm sorry." Katniss burst out angrily. Peeta and Plutarch starred at her confused. Peeta thought she was speaking to him, and he suddenly felt astonished. "I didn't take the pills." Peeta relaxed. Katniss looked up at Plutarch and stood up with her hands fisted. "I didn't. I can't. And I won't. I promise you, that I will not back down from my position if I lose the baby during the mission. By taking these pills, you- my own team- are murdering a person of my family." Peeta was amazed by what she was saying. "You wouldn't dare kill my sister, would you?" Plutarch opened his mouth to speak, but no words came. "Would you?" She demanded, hammering the table with her fists.

"No, Katniss. Unlike the Capitol, we don't kill innocent people."

"Exactly. Then why kill my child? Purposely? Knowing that by killing her, you are causing another conflict to arise." Katniss hissed and took the pill bottle out of a pocket on her jumpsuit. "Fuck these stupid pills. No matter what Coin says, I will not take these abortion pills." She slammed the container down on the table hard and walked out of the room with what Peeta called her 'sassy walk.' Plutarch watched her leave. And soon, Peeta was out the door too.

Katniss ran down the stairs in search of a new hiding place. She knew Peeta was not far behind, so she ran as fast as she could through the crowds of District 13 citizens.

"Katniss!"

Katniss kept running and got into the potable water source storage rooms and crawled between two big metal barrels.

"Katniss?"

She froze and held her breath when he saw him. "What you want?" She questioned and looked up to meet his gaze. He crawled in next to her, but she didn't bother moving or calling for Peeta. She didn't care about anything now.

"I know I shouldn't have, but I heard your conversation- or, your speech to Plutarch." He sounded weary. "I understand if you're angry but…"

He took a deep breath. "You're pregnant?" He sounded sympathetic. Strangely sympathetic. Katniss nodded and looked straight at the barrel in front of them. "Oh." Katniss turned her head and faced him and questioned him with her eyes. "Look," He said. "I'm trying to get myself back together. And I don't want you to feel scared… about me."

"I'm not."

"Shut up, I know you are, Catnip." He joshed.He lifted her chin but Katniss backed her head up a little, showing him that she still was recuperating from the night when he lashed out. When he said her nickname, it was like they were friends again. "And I see how things are now. And how they're gonna be. I understand that you're going to become a mother, and…" He paused. "I know that you love him. You love Peeta." Katniss looked at her knees and started to pick at a string poking out of her pant's fabric. "But I still want us to be friends. Let's start over. Pretend nothing bad ever happened. That we're only friends." Katniss wanted to agree. But she knew that Peeta was protecting her more than ever now.

"You're going to have to talk that up with Peeta."

"What? Katniss, he doesn't need to make decisions for you-"

"Unless you still want me as a friend, you're going to have to tell Peeta." She retorted.

"Why can't you tell him yourself?"

"He'll think that-" She paused. "That…" She shook her head. "You're going to have to ask him. Good luck, Gale." She stood up, stepped over Gale's feet and left the storage room. Katniss was still as unforgiving as ever.

**Yes, Gale has returned!**

**Don't forget to leave a review! And yes, 'joshed' is a real word, in case you were wondering when you were reading. Thank you for the favorites and follows!**


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you all for the great reviews! Thank you also for the favorites and follows! Just so you all know, the current name for the baby (Nerine) might not be the official name. Opinions always change! Writing might be a little slow :-/**

**I do not own the Hunger Games!**

Katniss entered her old compartment and found Prim and Lily at the table discussing something. Her mother stood up. "Hey, Peeta came in here looking for you. Are you alright?" Katniss nodded. "I'm fine."

"He looked really worried. He said he couldn't find you and he needed to speak with you." Lily informed her.

"I know." Katniss looked at her schedule on her hand.

"You should go get him, Katniss." She suggested. Without a word, Katniss turned around and left the compartment. Peeta could be anywhere looking for her. She decided to wander around the District until she would run into him. She didn't really want to be talked to. She wanted to be alone. But unfortunately, in her case, she wouldn't be alone for another nine months.

Katniss walked throughout the 100-200 compartment hallway, passing hers and Peeta's. For some reason, she didn't want Peeta at the moment. She didn't want his arms wrapped around her, or his soothing voice. But suddenly she heard it, his voice, and she started to run. She ran out of the hallway and back into the main vestibule of 13 and back into the new hiding place she went into 20 minutes ago. Peeta chased her and saw her crawl back in between the barrels. "Katniss, what's wrong?" His voice called.

"Peeta," She responded. She looked down at her knees. "Yeah?" He slowly got closer to where she was hiding.

"Can I be left alone for now?" She sighed. Peeta sighed.

"Why? Tell me what's wrong." Katniss heard him walk closer and crouch down. Katniss unexpectedly felt a need for him.

"Come here."

Peeta obediently crawled into the space and sat next to her. He wrapped his arms around her and she leaned her head against his chest. "What's up, love?" Katniss looked up at him and observed his eyes. "Nothing. I just felt a little sick."

"Of what? My unconditional love for you? Get used to it if you strangely haven't already." Peeta kissed the spot between her eyebrows. Katniss smiled and ran the back of her hand along his cheek.

"No. Nerine was making me sick."

"Aw. You're getting sick of her love?" He teased. "Nah, I'm kidding. Did you throw up?" Peeta put a hand on Katniss' belly.

"I didn't. I'm okay, it was just the same old nausea."

"Mm, okay." Peeta nodded and placed his chin on her head. "Are you feeling better?"

"A little. It comes and goes."

They lay there for a while, saying nothing. Just enjoying the feeling of their arms wrapped around each other. It was just her and Peeta.

_Right. _And the baby.

After a few minutes of silence, Katniss moved her head from under Peeta's chin and started to kiss his neck slowly. Peeta closed his eyes and enjoyed the feeling of her lips pressed against his skin. She trailed kisses along his prominent jaw line and then rested her head on his shoulder. She wrapped her legs around his waist and Peeta held them in place with his hands. He looked down at her and they pressed their faces together gently. Katniss slanted her head so her lips could fit against Peeta's.

And they kissed passionately for the first time in weeks. Katniss ran her hands along his shoulders and chest. Their kiss got more and more passionate until Peeta couldn't take it any longer. He started to unbutton her shirt and Katniss let him do all the work. They were hidden in this storage room with no chance of anyone walking in on them. Peeta rolled her onto her back as he discarded the last bits of his and her clothing. Katniss wrapped her arms around his neck.

He moved into Katniss slowly, both of them releasing quiet moans that were more like whispers. They were just a few steps away from a huge crowd of busy people. But all that mattered was now, and Katniss didn't really care if anyone saw them for some reason.

Peeta kissed her neck and chest slowly as Katniss' breathing returned to normal.

After they were both finished with each other, Katniss sat between his legs, her back facing him. His arms were wrapped around her torso and he had his chin rested on her shoulder. She was half dressed while Peeta looked like nothing happened. His hair was the only thing that could give them away, but he doubted anyone would guess he'd made love to Katniss. _Wait a minute. _Peeta took a deep breath and inhaled the familiar scent of...

_Katniss._ Well, in his mind, he would remember that scent belonging to Katniss. For the past times that they had intercourse, the room they were in always ended up smelling like this after it was all over. His clothes probably absorbed the scent by now and that was another thing that would definitely give them away when they left the room. Katniss looked up at him when she heard him sniff the air. "You smell that too?" Peeta blushed.

"Yeah. Let's hope that whoever comes in here next thinks it's just the dust."

…

They left the storage room with both of their hair in a mess. Katniss' waves were matted in clumps while Peeta's usually neat puffy hairstyle looked… not neat. They walked quickly, hand in hand through the district, heading towards the training centre. Along the hallways, Prim spotted them and walked up to Katniss.

"Boggs came into our room and he was asking me and mom where you guys were." Prim said. Peeta felt his ears burn with embarrassment.  
"We're heading to the training centre right now, so if you see him, tell him we'll be heading there, okay?" Katniss replied. Prim nodded. Just as Katniss and Peeta feared, she asked where they were.

"We were at the hospital. Getting a checkup for the baby." Katniss lied. Prim's blue eyes looked at her confused.

"I was just there. I didn't see you." It was like she knew, but was just making them feel uneasy. Prim eyed them carefully for a moment. The three of them shared glances, and then, Prim started to observe her sister's hair. She saw the clumps.

And smelt something odd, but still being young, she had no idea. But she recalled the scent to her and her mother's compartment this one time. "What were you doing to your hair?"

_Oh, Prim. If only it was this easy to tell you._

"Are you alright?" Judging by her voice tone, it seemed like she was guessing that Katniss had gone on a meltdown again.

"I'm fine, you don't need to worry. But we were in the hospital just now." Another lie.

Prim nodded. "You guys were probably on the other side, then." She then noticed a pinkish- red bite mark on her neck that was covered partially by Katniss' shirt. She decided she had asked too many questions. She then said goodbye and promised that if she saw Boggs she'd tell him that they were heading to the centre.

As she skipped off, Peeta released a breath. "Does she know?"

"About what?"

Peeta rolled his eyes playfully. "About human reproduction and all the details?"

Katniss chuckled once. "I don't know. Probably, I mean, just a little. It didn't seem like she knew just now."

…

When they arrived, Beetee's face lit up. He strolled towards them in his wheelchair. "Katniss, Peeta, I'd like to show you two something. You'll be using it while you're out in the Capitol." He led them towards a table, and picked up a small object with a screen. It was called the Holo and the couple was taught how to use it. Katniss felt her typical nausea taking over. While Beetee was explaining other weaponry and more about the Holo, Katniss interrupted. Peeta noticed her leaning on him slightly. He looked over at her face and her face looked pale.

"Peeta," She grabbed on to his shoulder. He held her up, asking her what was wrong. "It's nausea, I feel sick again." She began to walk out when Peeta turned around.

"I'm so sorry, Beetee, we'll be right back."

"It's alright. We still have a few weeks."

Peeta caught up to Katniss and led her towards the nearest bathroom. They entered and Peeta shut the door behind them and Katniss leaned over the sink. She closed her eyes and took deep breaths. Peeta soothingly rubbed his hand over her back. A throaty moan escaped her lips and she tasted puke on the back of her tongue. "When do you think the nausea will stop…?"

Peeta kissed her cheek. "I'm not sure, I'm no health expert. That's something you should ask Prim or your mother. But… maybe a month or two?"

"Ooh, god…" She sighed. The butterfly-like feeling intensified and saliva was building up in her mouth at a fast rate. She spit a ball of saliva into the sink and then her body tensed up and she vomited into the sink. She attempted to get her hair behind her ears, but had to lean on the sink. Peeta held her hair back and tucked it into her shirt. Katniss coughed, and Peeta asked, "Are you done, Kat?" She shook her head and a second later, her last wave of nausea passed up through the sink. Peeta turned the tap on and Katniss watched her vomit go down the drain. The smell made her gag and she turned away and buried her face in the paper towel Peeta passed her. She then dropped it and Peeta gave her a new one, and wiped away her sweat and saliva around her lips. Katniss leaned into him and looked at their reflection in the mirror. Peeta did the same.

His arms were wrapped around her waist and Katniss' hands were up at his chest.  
"Peeta…"

"Shh." He pressed her head into his chest and she grasped onto him tighter. A smile approached his face and he looked down between them. "How we doing down there?"

**Don't forget to leave a review!  
The action is coming, just wait about one more chapter!**


	15. Chapter 15

**Well. Thank you for reviews! Sorry this chapter took a bit longer to write.**

**Anyways, I'm here to tell you this might be the last chapter for two weeks because I'm gonna be on a vacation. I'll try to write one more, but I can't promise you anything.**

Four weeks had passed. Katniss' fear grew stronger each day. She feared the day that she would feel the baby stirring inside of her. And now every morning, she would look into the mirror and feel like her lower torso was growing in size when it actually wasn't.

Yet (according to Peeta).

The only thing that had changed was her waist; slightly. Sometimes, Peeta would see her running her hands along her sides while looking in the mirror. He would walk up to her and wrap his arms around her waist and rest his chin on her shoulder. Peeta would study their reflection and say comforting words to her.

"You look fine. I promise you, I barely notice anything." He would say, giving her bare shoulder a kiss.

"I don't really care about my looks, Peeta." Katniss straightened her white tank top.

Peeta sighed. "You don't know the impact you can have on me. You're beautiful. You know that, I know you do."

"I do." She looked down at the ground and blushed. Peeta kissed her cheek.

…

This morning though, things were different. Katniss and Peeta were sleeping peacefully side by side. Katniss felt relieved that she told Peeta to stop when she felt his hands glide under her nightgown before sleeping, because she heard a faint knocking sound at the door early in the morning. It was the day before their mission, and Katniss' previous days were filled with Peeta helping her through nausea, headaches, food cravings, and mood swings.

Katniss was still half- asleep, so she kept her eyes closed. The knocking continued.

She heard the door knob click since someone had opened it. Someone walked towards the bed and gently nudged Katniss' shoulder.

"Katniss, Peeta, wake up. You're wanted in Command." Her grey Seam eyes flickered open and she met Boggs' dark gaze. She suddenly felt embarrassed that he saw her and Peeta sleeping together- platonically. "I'm sorry that I woke you, but Coin would like to speak to both of you." Katniss nodded and rubbed her eyes.

"We'll be right there." She said quietly. Boggs nodded and walked out. The moment Katniss heard the door shut, she turned to face Peeta still sleeping. She smoothed his hair back with her hand and buried her nose in his golden curls.  
"Peeta, wake up. We need to go to Command." He moaned quietly and his blue eyes opened to see Katniss' lips hovering over his brows. She pressed her lips against his forehead and lifted her head off his. "We need to get ready." Katniss hopped off the bed and walked into the bathroom. Peeta laid back down and put his arm over his eyes, even though there was barely any light in the room. He heard the water from the shower start to pat against the bathtub floor and he got up and got his clothes ready and waited.

Inside, Katniss stood in the shower and stared blankly at the wall. She was worried about tomorrow. Tomorrow. The day that would be filled with explosions, running, hiding, and killing. Thinking about the details made butterflies spark up in her stomach. She wrapped her arms around her abdomen and inhaled and exhaled slowly. "It's okay. Shh." She spoke to herself and her unborn baby. In her mind, she started to think about worst- case scenarios. The fact of giving birth to a stillborn baby made tears form in her eyes. Her nose got stuffy and she started to let out whines from her mouth. The warmth on her cheeks told her that she was crying- that it wasn't the water from the shower. Her body began to jerk with sobs and she leaned against the wall and cried.

She tried to be quiet, so that Peeta wouldn't hear her.

After a few minutes, she felt relieved. She turned off the water, despite that she only rinsed. She dried herself off and put on her jumpsuit. She emerged from the bathroom with her dark hair shielding her face. Peeta stood up from where he sat and walked up to her and put his hands on her waist. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm okay." She nodded and walked around him.

After Peeta had finished showering the two headed down the corridors. She didn't speak a word. Peeta watched her from the side and her eyes were fixated at the end of the hallway. She looked emotionless as they walked. Peeta grasped her hand and she felt her fingers intertwine with his. When they reached the stairs and entered the room, Katniss let go of Peeta's hand and placed it on her stomach, since she felt anxious for what Coin was going to say this time.

Coin and Plutarch walked into the Command room. "Good morning." Coin nodded her head at them and she and Plutarch sat across the table. She put her hands on the tabled and rested her hands on top of one another. "Well. You're keeping this child, correct?"

"Yes." Katniss said quickly.

"And I was informed you refused the pills, Miss Everdeen. I understand how much the baby means to you, but I want to clarify some things with both of you." Peeta nodded. "Apart from any unfortunate events that occur, neither of you can back down from your positions."

"Especially you, Katniss. We can't lose our Mockingjay." Plutarch said.

"I won't back down. Even if I lose it."

Peeta looked at her with worry. He put his hand over hers on her lap. "I always keep my promises. Just ask Snow." Peeta looked up at Coin.  
"We'll keep each other going. I'll take care of her." Katniss blushed softly.

…

The rest of the day was training. Hard. Katniss' arms were sore after flexing back to pull an arrow out of her quiver. Peeta's thumbs got red from rubbing on the solid metal of his gun.

So when the day ended, Katniss needed to say her goodbyes to Prim and Lily now.

Prim was already changed into her white nightgown when Katniss came to say goodbye. Katniss embraced her sister tightly, running her hand down her soft blonde hair. "I know you're going to be okay." Prim spoke against Katniss' shoulder. "You've been in two arenas. I believe that nothing bad will happen to you." Katniss smiled as her mother joined their hug. Katniss wrapped an arm around her mother with the other wrapped around Prim. Lily gave Katniss a kiss atop of her head.

"You get some rest. Take care of yourself." She smiled. "And your baby." Katniss' lips formed into a small smile and she nodded.

"Thank you." Katniss hugged her mother tightly and then gave Prim a kiss on her forehead.

"I love you." Katniss said.

"I love you too." Prim replied.

…

When Peeta shut the door behind him and Katniss after they got their compartment, Katniss burst into tears. Peeta led her to the bed and held her head against his chest. He hushed her and calmed her down.

That night, Peeta fell asleep first and Katniss sat next to his sleeping figure. She looked at the black shirts and pants that they would wear the next morning underneath all of their protective covering. Katniss spoke to her baby, knowing Peeta was not listening. She looked down at Peeta's calm, and still body and smiled. She then froze.

Katniss felt something move.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hey! Guess whose back!**

**I AM**

**I wanna say something about the last chapter, when Katniss felt movement. It wasn't full-on the baby moving, because apparently, women don't feel the baby kick, stir etc. until about 28 weeks. What Katniss felt was her body developing with the baby inside of her. So yeah basically it was the baby causing her to feel stuff. **

**Okay**

**I am honestly really sorry if I stop posting for a long time 'cause of school. **

The beeping noise from Peeta's alarm echoed through Katniss' mind, even though it wasn't enough to make her open her eyes. She was now a bit aware of her surroundings, and she could feel's Peeta's body starting to move under hers. She could still sleep a while more—

_Wait, Peeta. _She felt Peeta lift her off of him and gently place her on the bed._ Stay with me. I don't want to leave yet. I don't want you to leave yet. _He sat up and kissed her forehead. She heard him yawn quietly. Then he lowered his head back to hers.  
"I'm going to go shower." He whispered quietly. "I love you." He added. Peeta went around her body on the mattress and hopped off the bunk bed. He patted the wall with his hands and found the light switch, and a dim, tan light filled the room. He walked over to the chair and picked up his black shirt and pants and entered the bathroom.

The yellowish-brown lights calmed Katniss. She could still feel Peeta's warmth on the mattress and buried her nose in the thin bed sheet covering the mattress. She inhaled the mild scent of Peeta. Despite how long he had spent away from the home, he still smelt scarcely of cinnamon and dill. She found sleep again, and dreamed of the Capitol.

She was in the tribute centre, lying in her bed, starring up at the jewelled green lamps hanging from the blue ceiling. It was the room from her first games, so she was alone. It was sunrise, and in her dream, she knew it was the morning of her first games. She waited several hours and no one came to wake her. Katniss sat up and walked over to the window, getting a view of the huge city. The land was drenched in a peachy orange hue. The pink sunlight reflected off of the buildings' windows so it looked like fire.

_Fire. _

The buildings were burning from the inside, the flames peeking out of the melted windows. She watched in awe as the skyscrapers tumbled onto the pastel- colored brick streets. The sweet scent of cinnamon and dill was replaced by the familiar scent of fire. The scent of burning plastics entered her lungs. The foul smell bothered her, and she covered her nose and mouth. Katniss felt a flame lick her elbow and she gasped and turned around yelling in pain. The fire was an orange blanket burning its way towards the window- where she was. Her breathing quickened, which was worse, since she was inhaling smoke and vulgar melted plastic fumes. The heat made tears leak down her cheeks and screamed, trying to smash the window. It was no use, the glass was probably a foot thick. Her screams filled the room and she woke. Instead of screaming and thrashing, she was frozen in place trembling and whimpering. She could still feel the flames burning her skin. She looked at her elbows and found only year-old scars.

Her breathing returned to normal and she closed her eyes again and embraced her pillow, imagining it was Peeta. She slept for about 10 more minutes and Peeta exited the bathroom, all fresh and clean. He walked up to the bed and rested his arms on the mattress next to Katniss' body. Her dark hair was splayed across her back and her long bangs were hiding her closed eyes a bit. Peeta swiped her bangs behind her ears so he could get a better view of his treasured Katniss. How badly he wanted to touch her. Run his hands along her body teasingly and make her whimper for more. But they didn't have time. So, instead, he gave her a kiss, neither soft nor passionate. "Katniss." He whispered lovingly. Her olive eyelids opened slowly, revealing her grey Seam eyes. Katniss scanned his face and she observed his blue eyes. "Good morning, beautiful." Katniss' cheeks and upper nose turned pink and her eyes got dark. She gave Peeta the loving and caring stare she gave him when she kissed him. Or someone else.

Katniss moved a hand from under her pillow and put it around Peeta's neck. Peeta moved his arms from the mattress and put them around Katniss' shoulders. She brought her lips to his and kissed him sweetly. "I want you to hold me." She whispered against his lips.

"I am holding you."

"No, really, really hold me."

Peeta sighed and lifted himself up on the bed and Katniss got up to sit on his lap. Peeta put an arm over her body and grasped onto her hip bone to keep her close. He lifted her head with his other hand. Katniss put a hand on his chest and her fingers crept under his black shirt. She ran her fingers against his collarbones with feather-light touches. Peeta watched her and moved his hand to her legs. He ran his hands along the soft skin on her calves, feeling a few scars. He turned his attention to her legs and noticed he was just passing his fingers along a bruise below her knee. She gasped. Katniss' leg twitched and she lifted her head to see what the pain she felt was caused by. The violet color was easy to spot against her olive skin. Katniss moved a hand to the bump and felt pain spread through her leg.

"What happened to your leg?"

"I don't know. But it doesn't matter." She said, returning her attention to Peeta. She wrapped her arms around his neck and started the cuddling. She rubbed the side of her cheek against Peeta's chest and wriggled her legs closer to him. Peeta leaned his cheek on her head and closed his eyes. Katniss felt the same stirring from last night in her stomach again and Peeta felt her tense up. He looked down and saw her stare at the wall. She looked scared and shocked.

"You have to get ready now." Peeta said. Katniss nodded and wriggled out of Peeta's grasp and hopped off the bed. She collected her clothing and closed the door to the bathroom. Peeta sat up on the bed and pulled out a black chain necklace from under his shirt. He observed it; running his thumb along the rectangle-shaped charm. He felt the groves under his finger tip- the groves that spelt out '451'. Coin gave everyone in the Squad one of their own.

Katniss scrubbed shampoo in her hair and watched the sweet-smelling bubbles float their way to the shower drain. She stared at her feet for a while and felt the lukewarm water collected in streams on her legs. She felt tears prickling in her eyes and she started to feel horrible for her baby. _This was a mistake. This was never supposed to happen. I was never supposed to be in the Games. I was never supposed to fall in love, or get pregnant. I was never supposed to lead a revolution._

_I can't. Nerine, I can't. I can't lose you._

Katniss was now on her knees with tears spilling from her eyes, being choked by sobs. She huddled in the corner of the shower where the water could barely touch her. She grew cold with only the water hitting her toes. Katniss kept her knees pressed against her chest and buried her face in her knees. Her tears fell onto her abdomen which made her feel worse. She sat there, for 15 minutes maybe. She knew Peeta was going to get worried about why she was taking so long- because he knew that's she knew they didn't have a lot of time left. Peeta would come crashing through the door any second. But she didn't care if he saw her where she was. She wanted to feel his arms around her again, protecting her from anything. But she was too afraid to call for him.

Five minutes passed and Katniss was already drowning in sleep, her head leaning against the side of the shower. She was woken up by a knocking sound at the door. Her head jerked up from where it laid and when she heard Peeta's voice asking if she was okay, she felt tears start to form in her eyes again.

"Katniss?" He knocked. He pressed his ear against the door and felt his heart drop when he heard her cry. "Katniss? I'm coming in, okay?" Katniss stared at the shower curtain. "Is… is that okay with you?" He asked. She didn't respond. Peeta sighed and opened the door slowly. What did it matter? He's seen her many times. And she'd seen him just as many times as he did.

The door knob clicked and Katniss heard the door open. Peeta pulled the shower curtain back slowly. He peeked and saw her sitting in the corner of the shower. "Katniss," He said, his voice sounding worried. He turned off the water and reached for a towel outside of the shower. He took his socks off and hopped into the shower. Katniss kept her gaze down. "Hey." He wrapped the towel around her body and he pulled her up. He lead her out of the shower and he hugged her. His shirt got wet with her hair but he didn't care. He dried her face off. "What's wrong?"

Katniss' face got wet again with tears. "I'm scared." Peeta nodded and pulled her closer to him. He kissed the top of her head. Then, he started to dry her off. "Here. I'll help you get dressed." Katniss put on her undergarments and Peeta slipped her black shirt over her head. She could feel butterflies in her stomach. She was about to reach for her pants when she felt numb. "I don't want to go." She whimpered. "I wish I could stay here with you. And wait until it's all over."

"I know you do, Katniss. And so do I. But they can't win this war without us, can they?" He helped her put her pants on.

"No." She sighed. She hugged him.

"It'll be okay." He responded. He kissed her lips softly, gently. "We have each other, don't we, my Mockingjay?" She felt a rush of happiness spread through her when she heard him call her his Mockingjay. Which she was.

…

"Be my Mockingjay, just for this night." He had said to her the second time before they got intimate. He had already took his shirt off.

"Your Mockingjay?"

"Yeah." He kissed her neck and she moaned when she felt his hot breath on her skin. "Mine. No one else's." She didn't understand. His Mockingjay? She looked at him in question. He rolled his eyes.

"You're so pure… so innocent." He knew she hated it when he called her that.

"I'm not pure!" Katniss exclaimed. "Why else would I have—"She gasped again and could feel her cheeks getting hot when he aligned their two bodies and slid his hands up her arms to grasp her hands. He could see lust and anger in her silver eyes.

"It doesn't matter." He kissed her lips. "I love you either way."

"Im not pure, Peeta," she whispered under her breath. He smiled and unbuttoned her jumpsuit slowly. "I'm not innocent."  
Okay. Yeah, she wasn't.

"In bed you are. You have such little knowledge." She decided to just suck up the teasing. She thought deeply and realized that Peeta was using dirty talk. He could see in her eyes; that she knew now.

"Mockingjay," He whispered to get her attention.

"Mm."

"Will you sing for me? Just the same way you did that other night…" He took off her bra and then kissed a straight line down her exposed chest and stomach.

_Oh. _

"Katniss." He spoke. "Do you want me?"

She sighed when she opened her eyes to see him wearing only his boxers._ "Like __**hell**__."_

…

"I guess so." Katniss replied. Peeta dried her hair and combed it.

"Are you going to braid your hair?" She nodded and did it in small three minutes. Some hair framed her face. She walked out of the bathroom to see Peeta putting his socks on again. "Ready?"

"Ready than I'll ever be." She sighed. She kissed him and then pressed her forehead against his. She held him close by pulling his shirt slightly. Peeta joined their lips again and stroked her bottom lip with his tongue. "I love you." Peeta touched his nose against hers.

"Me too." His hands went to her belly. He lowered himself and pressed his ear against her stomach. He held her waist. Katniss held his hands in place and looked at the contrast of her olive skin against his pale, fair skin. Katniss felt his lips kiss her navel.

"We can do this, okay?"

She ran her hand through his soft hair. He stood up again and cupped her face. He kissed her lips for a long time. She opened her mouth and felt his tongue enter her mouth. She slanted her head slightly and moaned quietly. He pulled back slowly. He kissed her quickly on the forehead. "Lets go."

_You are the hole in my head_

_You are the space in my bed_

_You are the silence in between_

_What I thought and what I said_

**What do you guys think? Thank you for so many follows, though! I love hearing back from you guys, because it really helps. **

**Again, Im really damn sorry if I don't post for a long time, because I know you guys spent 2 weeks without an update. Idk how long it'll be for another update, but probably none for the rest of the month **

**I am truly sorry you guys.**


	17. Chapter 17

**Surprise every-juan**

**I found some time today. Looks like the school/HW/ect. schedule might not be so busy. Thank you all for 80 followers! I noticed several of you are super desperate to find out what things are going to happen while 451 is in the Capitol. **

**DYK this story was originally supposed to be 3 chapters long and the original name was "They're Back", to represent that Peeta, Johanna and Annie had been rescued. But I decided to make it longer. And the old name wouldn't fit that much after, because after the first few chapters of HITPWILY, things change, and it isn't ****just**** about Peeta and the others returning. Ammirite?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own THG.**

Peeta held Katniss' hand and they headed to Special Weaponry. Beetee and Boggs were waiting for them, along with Coin. Boggs looked ready to go, speaking with Coin. Peeta nodded his head forward at them. She stretched her lips into a thin, not-quite a smile.

"Alright." Coin said. "I'll be leaving now."

With just that, she was gone. It was like she didn't trust the two to arrive on time. Or to arrive at all.

Katniss walked over to where her black equipment was. She looked at the bulletproof vest and _recalled_ what happened on the Squad's last mission. "Is thing actually bulletproof now?" She asked, with edge in her voice. Peeta looked at her concerned, knowing she was angry because she was being sent to war in a serious condition.

"Yes, Katniss," Beetee replied. "I assure you." She nodded. She started to put on her suit and felt the familiar heavy feeling on her back when she slipped the quiver strap over her shoulders. Katniss opened the pocket on her shoulder and took out a small object. Even though she had Peeta with her - and she knew he wouldn't lose him- she wanted to keep the pearl close to her.

"Katniss." Peeta was holding her bow. "Here." She took it and gave him a sad stare. He looked handsome dressed in his black outfit and she walked closer to him.

"You two ready?" Boggs asked.

"Yeah." Peeta nodded. He looked back at Katniss. He held out his hand. She took it in hers and held it gently and Peeta thanked Beetee. Boggs lead them to the hovercraft. Katniss walked slowly with a hand on her stomach. She could feel pressure on her waist. Her body was actually developing to having the baby. It hurt slightly, and she knew that when she removed the vest she would have marks on her sides. When they entered the hovercraft, there were more people. Boggs told them that they were additions to the squad and were here to guard her and Peeta. Gale and Katniss' eyes met and she eyed him until she sat down. Katniss reached for Peeta's hand again and rested her head on his shoulder. She starred at the tiny windows near the roof of the hovercraft. The feeling in her stomach intensified until she felt lightheaded. She buried her face in his shoulder and closed her eyes. Katniss could feel nausea again. Peeta moved his head so it was lying on Katniss' head. He didn't know yet. Katniss felt the hovercraft lift off the ground.

Her body started to tremble, but she tried to keep the intensity down. Peeta's body moved to face her. "I'm okay, don't worry about me. I'm fine." She whispered. His blue eyes were filled with concern. "I'm really okay, just anxious." Peeta sighed and wrapped his arms around her.

"Me too." He replied quietly. Katniss closed her eyes again, hoping it would get rid of the nausea. She would tremble lightly every few minutes and release a fast breath. She dreamed about the Capitol.

Just walking through the great city. It was empty and quiet, and it seemed as if nothing happened. The buildings were still up, and there wasn't anything she'd suspected of seeing on the floor. It was abandoned. She was alone, but she didn't feel scared. Instead, she felt rather curious, and felt like venturing through every street. Only that after a few minutes, she felt dizzy again, and could feel someone calling her name. In her dream – which was starting to feel like a nightmare- she began to panic. She began to call for him, over and over again.

Peeta nudged Katniss and she started to let out small whimpers. She was stuck in her nightmare. They were arriving to their destination. Her whimpers became tiny yelps of his name. He felt worried whenever she got stuck in a dream and couldn't wake her. He raised the intensity of his nudging and shook her by the shoulders.

Within seconds, her grey eyes shot open and she stared at Peeta's blue eyes in alarm.

"What… where…" She mumbled. He pressed and finger to her lips.

"Shh." He purred. "We're nearing Twelve." She quickly sat up confused.

"Twelve? But why? What's going on?" She asked looking around at the rest of the Squad.

"Calm down, Katniss. We're here just to take the train to the Capitol." Finnick raised a hand like he always did to calm her down. "We're not going to be here for long." Katniss was relieved they weren't going to spend too much time here. She was still scared of seeing her home destroyed. When they arrived, the fancy trains that she and Peeta once would go on were replaced with cargo carts that were packed with other rebels, dressed similarly with dark outfits. It was going to be several days on the track, so most of the squad just slept. The only sounds at night was the barely inaudible sound of the cart speeding along the track and shifting of quiet feet. And, of course, Katniss' screaming. She felt embarrassed that everyone here wasn't as damaged as she was. Peeta had never screamed in his sleep, but only murmured small and quiet words.

After a few days on the train and several hours hiking, they arrived to a rebel encampment. The rebels had pushed the Peacekeepers out of the area. The squad pitched tents in specific areas they were assigned. According to Boggs, it was safe since the Capitol had lost many hoverplanes when the squad took over Two, and that if the Capitol still had any, they were saving those until the last minute.

Katniss and Peeta were given their own tent.

Peeta stayed outside speaking with the others while Katniss accommodated the sleeping bags inside. She rid herself of her uniform except for the shirt. She changed her pants into thinner ones and slid into a sleeping bag. She didn't want to sleep without Peeta yet; knowing she would have a nightmare. It was about 9 P.M and it was dark. Katniss could hear crickets. The dark green color of the tent turned a deep teal color with the darkness. Whenever she was lonely, she thought about Nerine.

_Nerine. _She mouthed the name until it sounded unfamiliar. Katniss had a feeling that the baby was not going to end up being a 'Nerine'. She thought of other names. Flowers. Trees. Some distant names she'd heard back in 12. There was a quiet sound outside. The green color of the tent appeared again when a flashlight was shined on it. The tent zipper was opened and Peeta wriggled his way passed the nylon. The light filled the tent. It was neither too bright nor too gloomy. Katniss shifted her gaze down at him. Peeta removed his uniform also. He fidgeted with something on his jacket.

"I'm awake, you know." Katniss spoke. He turned around.

"I know." He said softly.  
"Oh." Katniss saw that Peeta's curls were flattened down slightly, and that his face looked shiny. "Come here, then." She sat up slightly. Peeta grinned and dried his face off with his shirt. He moved towards the sleeping bags and squirmed next to Katniss' body. He ruffled his hair so the curls pointed in different directions. Katniss ran her fingers through his wet, blonde hair.  
"It was raining." Said Peeta, observing her. He pulled her towards him and put his lips near hers.

"You know," Peeta rubbed both their noses together. "I had to resist you a couple times on that train. Sometimes in your sleep, you'd call for me." He had a shy grin on his face. Katniss' face turned pink. She already knew what this was leading to. She sighed quietly. "Well, that dream wasn't pleasant. I was in some dark room and I was scared so I called for you." Peeta still had a smile on his face. He cupped her cheeks and kissed her softly. "You're irresistible."

"Well, if you can't resist me, than I guess we could…" Her voice drifted off.

"You sure? We don't need to if you don't want to."

"There's no one else here but you and me, is there?" Peeta chuckled and started to kiss her neck. In one swift movement, he slipped his shirt over his head.

**Let's let them do their thaaang**


	18. Chapter 18

**I think its weird that THG and the Twilight series both have their main character getting pregnant when she's a teen. Well Katniss wasn't really pregers, but I mean the authors sure set an example for some of us didn't they? xD**

**Okay, so I personally think that the recent chapters have been a little boring… but don't worry, it'll get better I promise, like REAAALLLLY promise. I've written the entire plot I just need to add detail and etc. Well.**

**To start off this chapter… :D**

"Katniss?"

No response.

"Katniss."

"Mm?"

"Are you okay?"

"Mm hm."

"Okay."

Peeta held her closer and kissed her head. He released something that sounded like a mix of a sigh and a moan. Katniss turned her head so that she was facing him. She kept her lips pressed down to her hands which were splayed across Peeta's chest. It looked like her grey eyes were glowing in the dark.

"You don't think they heard us, do you?" She asked and started to draw patterns on his skin.  
"Nah. You were pretty quiet this time." Quickly, her head jolted up to meet his gaze.

"So you're saying I'm loud?"

"Ooh, yeah. I'm surprised you haven't noticed." The lust that was once in her eyes vanished. She was angry.

"Damn you."

"You already did." He teased. "A lot." She got up and stared at him angrily. She was now wearing her typical scoff.  
"Stop it, Peeta."

"What?" Her eyes narrowed. He reached for her. "I like it when you do that… it's so se-"

"Stop it!" Katniss slapped his hand away, already knowing what he was going to say. She covered herself with the extra sleeping bag to hide her body from him. Only her head and the top of her shoulders peeked out of the thick black fabric. Her eyes looked at the canvas of the tent. Katniss had been getting irritated easier due to her hormones. Peeta watched her fiddle with something on the ground. She was distracted. A smirk crept up on his face. He thought it was cute when she got angry, and he also liked it because he always knew how to make her calm again. Especially now, since she wasn't wearing anything.

He lunged at her so he was on top of her. She let out a yelp when she hit the ground. The sleeping bag instantly slipped off her body and Peeta pinned her arms above her head and started to kiss her neck and her shoulders. Katniss wriggled and tried to move her legs but they also held down by Peeta's. He found the pink scar under her collarbone, which he liked a lot for some reason. He nipped at it with his lips. She started to feel a pinching sensation where his lips were. He then bit her shoulder lightly. Katniss knew he was doing it out of unconditional love for her, but she hated it. "Peeta!" She growled and shifted her shoulders. She panted quietly and just felt him keep kissing her neck. "Don't be so moody." He whispered against her skin. "What happened to that smile you had before?"

"You took it. That was your fault." She snarled. She thrashed a little more. The sounds of Peeta's lips on her skin and her moving against the nylon sleeping bag filled the tent. Peeta bit hardly on a sensitive part of her body; between her neck and her shoulder. She yelped in pain and kept squirming. He laid down on her completely so she wasn't able to move as much. Katniss grunted and felt her lungs start to thirst for more air. He kept his lips on her shoulder. She was making strange, high pitched whining noises and squeaks. "Peeta…!" She shrieked. She kept squeaking and gasping for air. Her arms were still held above her head. "You're making it… worse, Peeta." She inhaled. Finally, he lifted himself off and let go of her wrists. She groaned when she felt the pressure lift off her chest.

Peeta chuckled and kissed her. She kissed back but that was all she did. Katniss kept her gaze down when he pressed his forehead against hers. There was still a smile on his face. She looked at her shoulder and rubbed the pink skin. There was a hickey on her collar bone. "Thanks."

She looked up at him with the sad and tired look of hers. Her body was basically blue due to the poor lighting. Peeta's skin didn't look as dark. His smile shrank a little. Then he kissed her lips. They felt dry and cracked under his soft, supple ones. She sighed and accepted his kiss. The moment he pulled away, her dead dropped to the side with her eyes closed.

"Someone's tired." She didn't respond but instead stayed in her position. He smoothed back her hair and kissed her forehead. She opened her eyes and moved from under him. She slipped on a white long sleeve shirt and her undergarments. She then got into her sleeping bag and laid down again. She looked over at Peeta to see him sitting and starring at the tent canvas. She lifted her head to see Peeta's shirt and tossed it at him. It landed on his head so his blonde hair was replaced by a black sheet of cloth. His eyes were covered too. He let out a small groan which made her laugh.

"Put something on!" She exclaimed. A smile emerged from his face and he chuckled. Katniss then reached for his pants and threw it at his shoulder, making a 'whap' noise. He pulled the shirt off his head and put it on. He struggled to put his pants on in the small space. Eventually, he got them on and nestled next to Katniss and was enveloped in warmth. He put his hands on her hips and closed his eyes. She put a hand around the back of his neck and brought his face close to his. Then she gave him a light kiss on the nose and then closed her eyes.

…

Katniss' eyes opened slowly to realize that the tent was illuminated by sunlight. She could hear birds singing outside, along with people speaking. Peeta was sleeping on his stomach with his head still facing her direction. She ran her finger along his cheeks and then pulled her body out of the sleeping bag, only to be greeted by the cold. Quickly, she got out of the bag and pulled on her pants and her jacket. She braided her hair and checked the time. It was 9:00 A.M. Peeta moaned in his sleep. Her lips curved into a smile. She reached towards him so she could pet his blonde hair. Peeta sighed when her fingers made contact with his curls. He was now aware of his surroundings but kept his eyes closed. Katniss gave his head a scratch. He shifted slightly. She starred at the sleeping bag and had a flashback. Her body froze.

"What?" Peeta mumbled. "Why'd you stop…" He lifted his head and his eyes were half open. Katniss was looking at the tent canvas. Her grey eyes looked scared. He lifted a hand and stroked her chin. "Are you okay?" He asked. She nodded and met his blue gaze.

"I'm okay." She continued stroking his head. "How'd you sleep?"

"Good." He stretched himself out on the sleeping bag and a shiver ran down his spine. "Ooh… it's cold." He pulled the blanket over his head, blocking out the sunlight. And Katniss.

She pulled the blanket down and handed him his black sweater. He slipped it over his head and sat up. Katniss settled behind him and wrapped an arm around his left shoulder and the other under his right arm, so her hands met as his chest. She kissed his cheek and pressed her nose into his pale skin. "You warm now?"

"Yes." He put his hands on her wrists and turned his head so that their lips skimmed each other's lightly. Suddenly, the tent entrance was zipped open and Finnick peeked his head in. Katniss looked up in shock, imagining it to be Gale. She relaxed slightly, but felt invaded.

"Finnick!" Katniss exclaimed. She jumped around Peeta and towards Finnick. He was wearing that mischievous smirk of his and moved out of the tent. Katniss poked her head out to see Finnick laughing.

"I'm sorry!" He laughed. "Breakfast is ready, lovebirds." He continued laughing and walked back to where Katniss assumed he was before; the fire pit. She hated it when she got called a lovebird.

"Fucking dumbass." She whispered in a low tone, hoping Peeta wouldn't hear. He snorted and pulled her back.

"Calm down, girl on fire." He laid down so that she was on top of him. "That was unexpected, wasn't it?" He snorted.

"I hate it when people do that." She hissed. "I hate it, I hate—"

"Shh, sh." He pressed his index finger to her lips and she pushed it off. "Don't let those hormones take over." Peeta pushed her bangs out of her face and kissed the hard spot between her brows. Katniss then pressed her face against his chest.

"I really didn't want a kid."

"Well, there's nothing you can do, is there, Katniss?"

She recognized the voice and saw Finnick again.

"Damn you!" She screamed. She pushed herself off of Peeta's body and scrambled out of the tent. Finnick's green eyes widened in surprise when he saw her eyes flushed with anger and he made a run for it. Peeta could hear Katniss yelling at Finnick. "I'm going skin you, you idiot!" He snickered and got his boots on.

Then he left the tent and smelt the rain from the previous night. He turned around to see the squad at the fire pit handing out breakfast to the whole squad. Katniss and Finnick were nowhere to be seen. When he got to the fire pit, Finnick burst through the trees and bushes, covered in yellow-green leaves. A few seconds later Katniss leapt out, this time, with a smile on her face. Finnick slowed down and put his hands up in the air.

"Okay!" Peeta heard him shout. "You win! I'm sorry." Katniss punched the side of his shoulder hard. Mitchel and the whole camera crew except for Cressida laughed and whistled. The smile on Katniss' face was gone and she was speaking to Finnick. She shoved him back and Peeta decided it was time for her to settle down. He darted towards them and held her wrists and put them down.

"Alright, that's enough." He said with laughter still in his voice. "Okay?"

Katniss nodded and pulled her wrists from his grip. "Don't do that again, Finnick." She growled.

He smiled and held his hands up again. "Okay, okay." He chuckled. Katniss glared at him as he left.

"He was just playing, Kat."  
"Like I said." She sighed. "I ha-"

"Righto." Peeta ruffled her hair and nuzzled his nose against hers. "I understand. But don't pay attention to him, he's just being…" His voice drifted off. "Finnick." Katniss nodded in approval. Peeta put his hands on the small of her back and lead her towards the others. They headed over and Peeta pressed his lips against her temple.  
"Love you."

"Mm hm." She responded. 'Me too', she mouthed.

**Okeydokey**

****Might not post for a while.****

**Hope you guys are liking it! I was kind of in a rush to finish this chapter. Please leave a review because they help me a lot. And yes, to those who keep on reminding me, I KNOW THAT KATNISS AND PEETA'S DAUGHTER'S NAME (IN THE EPILOGUE) IS WILLOW. And yeah I also know that their son's name is Rye. I've known this for a long time now. The reason that their baby has a different name in my story is because Katniss and Peeta aren't like 35, they are 17 so I'd assume they would have different opinions about what to name their child. Yeah, its about time I got that out to those specific people out there. So, Capitol action will start next chapter for sure.**

**If not then**

**Well you can blame me.**


	19. Chapter 19 Part I

**This is Part 2 of Chapter 19. As promised, here it is, a few days after Part 1 was released; unlike Lionsgate. This chapter is based on the song 'Mirror' by Ellie Goulding**

_Is this our world?_

_I look in the mirror_

_I can't get over you_

_Is this our world?_

Her fingers would twitch suddenly. She was going to wake up soon; she had been sedated for almost 3 hours. She didn't know what she was going to be told when her eyes opened. The leftover survivors in the Squad managed to haul an unconscious Katniss out of the tunnels.

Mitchel and Peeta had saved them time.

Cressida then led Finnick, Gale – who was carrying Katniss - and Pollux to Tigris's shop. Now they all were in the basement, hiding from the Peacekeepers and the citizens. Pollux silently wept in the corner while Cressida and Finnick were fast asleep. Gale was keeping an eye on Katniss. And Katniss- well, she was out like a light. Tigris gave the squad furs to sleep on. Katniss was surrounded by a sea of pelts. Her braid had come undone when they pulled her out of the tunnels, so now it spilled around her shoulders in loose, dark waves.

The sound of slight movement came to her and Katniss _started_ to move her eyes while they were closed. She breathed in a bland scent of dust.

Katniss's eyes shot open and she started to breathe hard, wheezing. She sat up against the wall and looked around quickly. She didn't know where she was. Her hair got stuck on the sweat starting to form on her face, so she couldn't see clearly. Her wheezing turned into whimpers and little yelps and gasps. Gale quickly got up to reassure her. When she felt his hands on her shoulders she started to scream. "No! No!"

"Katniss." He said loudly. "You're okay, we're safe from the mutts." Still not looking up to meet his gaze, she grabbed onto his arms and held on. Her screams got quieter but she continued panting.

Her head perked up quickly. Gale could see one of her grey eyes behind her hair that was already damp with her sweat. It was wide with shock and worry, but he could tell that she'd forgotten. "Gale?" She whispered hoarsely. "Where are we? What happened?" She quickly asked. "Peeta?"

He gulped, knowing that she was going to go hysterical. "Katniss." He spoke calmly. "We're in a basement, it belongs to Tigris. She can be trusted, she's friends with Cressida and Boggs." Katniss started to mumble silently. Gale wanted to push the strands of hair out of her face, just so he could see her face. He found it easier to speak with people when he could see their faces. Katniss looked around the basement. Cressida, and the others were lying down, some of them trying to sleep. But someone was missing.

"Where's Peeta?"

She had forgotten. She had no idea. Maybe sedating her wasn't that bad of an idea, Gale thought. "Where is he?" Worry was in her voice. Gale just stared at that one eye he could see. _Just remember, Katniss. You know what happened._ As if she got the message, she did remember now. Because for a moment, she went still, and she stopped breathing. Her eyes glued to Gale's. She felt numb.

"Where is he?" She demanded. Gale tightened his grip on her shoulders.  
"Katniss, he's gone." He spoke slowly. "He went with the others to fight of the mutts. But he didn't come back."

"Get off of me!" She demanded. "You threw that Holo down! You killed him!" Katniss shoved him into a wall and started to punch him across the face. She began to scream obscenities at him, using more and more force her punch him. Katniss resulted in waking Cressida and Finnick. When Finnick saw what Katniss was doing, he quickly hopped up and pulled her off of Gale. "Katniss, get off of him!" He tore her away from him as she thrashed and sobbed. She pulled her wrists away from Finnick's grip and crawled away from him, towards a corner in the basement, behind pipes. Already a mess, she curled up and let this moment take over. She was having a nightmare that had come true.

She cried and screamed for Peeta.

_I look in the mirror_

_And I try to see myself_

_My head full of terror_

_From the games I played so well_

Her face was soaked in sweat and tears, and she didn't get any quieter. Over and over again, she screamed in frustration and in sadness. Peeta's name was all you could hear. Bouncing off the walls, in a manner that made it seem as if Katniss was being tortured. The others could hear her banging her fists into the pipes. Katniss punched the metal tubes until she could feel blood trickling down the back of her hands. She gasped at the pain and pressed her fist into the ground, letting the stinging sensation spread throughout her body. She whimpered quietly, knowing it would get infected. But it didn't matter anymore. Nothing did.

_I try to see clearer_

_I try to forget the fires I started_

_I try to be nearer_

_To where you are_

"Peeta." She gasped. She patted the walls and ran her hands along the pipes and other things she felt. Katniss searched the area she was in for something sharp.

_Are we star-crossed lovers?_

_Did I really want you gone?_

_If I'm really a winner_

_Where did these demons come from?_

She ran her fingers along the joints on the pipes until she felt something prick her thumb. She located it again. It was a bent piece of metal.

Cautiously, she placed her wrist over it. She pressed her wrist down on the jagged piece of metal and let out a wail. She lifted her chin and underwent the feeling of the metal piercing her skin and veins. When it hit a nerve, she pulled her wrist off and an ear-piercing shriek echoed. She continued whimpering and releasing cries.

_I was the girl who was on fire_

_Only a bird could get much higher_

_Because I was the girl who was on fire_

Gale wanted to make her stop.

The whole squad was quiet, and Cressida had woken up. "We should sedate her again." Cressida suggested.

"No. That'll make it worse when she wakes up. We should let her mourn."

The sounds Katniss was making sounded strange for them to be signs of mourning. "She's hurting herself." Gale sighed.

"You think she's hurting herself?" Cressida inquired.

"I think so. I heard her when she was in pain in the clock arena." Gale kept his eyes locked at the place where Katniss was hiding. "I can tell."

From behind the pipes, a cry of pain emerged. Now it was obvious she was doing something to herself.

He could see the pipes she was hiding behind shake slightly. He would get glimpses of her hands in between them. She continued filling the room with cries.

Katniss looked through the pipes and saw Gale staring back at her. The streetlights outside peeked through the blinds in the small window and a ray of light fell right on one of Katniss's eyes. Her eye looked blue with the light shined on it, not grey. Her hands were on the pipes, and it looked like she was a prisoner and the pipes were bars. With the light coming from outside, Gale saw it reflect off of the liquid on Katniss's hands. Blood.

"She's bleeding." Gale grunted. He got up and searched for the first aid kit in his got it and walked towards where Katniss was. As he suspected, she jumped away from the pipes and scrambled behind the wall, so she was completely surrounded by darkness. She made a lot of noise as she quickly tousled. Gale crouched down a few feet in front of her. She yelped quietly and pushed herself as close as she could against the wall. Her eyes were wide with alarm and she cried again. Her eyes caught a gold glimmer on the wall and she knew what it was. She shook the doorknob and wriggled into the furnace room.

"Katniss."

"No! Get away from me, please!" She begged.

"Katniss , you're bleeding. It's going to get infected and we can't lose our Mockingjay."  
"I. Am not. You're Mockingjay." She stopped to breathe every few second sin between her sentences. She spoke firmly, under a low and serious tone. But he could still hear terror and misery behind her raspy voice. "I'm… I'm…" She breathed in and he heard her sniffle. "Peeta..." She whined. Her small frame started to tremble as she cried.

"You're not mine, Katniss. And I'm not yours. I know that; what I meant is that you're still the face of the rebellion. And we're almost there. The war's almost over."  
"You killed him." She barked.

"He sacrificed himself!" He shouted. She was startled and started to cry again, like a little kid. She shook her head slightly and her body started to jerk with sobs. She was sensitive to anything at the moment. "Katniss, please, I'm trying to help you. What I did back there was to save us. Peeta sacrificed himself, why can't you see that?"

She was in shock, and was tired, so she couldn't argue anymore. "Just let me go." She pleaded. "I don't want to be here. I want to go home." Katniss whimpered like a she was a small child.

"There is no home." Gale replied. "There's nothing left, Katniss. Don't you see? There is no home for us anymore." Katniss let her tears fall freely.

"You don't understand." She muttered. "My home became wherever he was. He is my home, Gale."

Gale wanted to roll his eyes at her sappy comment. Instead he exhaled and walked closer to her. Already expecting it, Gale saw Katniss scamper away from him. "I won't hurt you. I'm here to help you." She just looked up at him. "Catnip."

She softened a little at the sound of her nickname. "I'm going to be okay. Just leave me alone." Gale knew what she was going to do.

Just hurt herself more, make herself bleed, find something sharp and punish herself, when it wasn't her fault. She didn't understand her lover's offering. "I don't want you to hurt yourself. It'll only make matters worse. I still care about you. You're in enough pain."

She was baring her scowl when she gave in. "Do it fast." She grumbled. Gale got down on his knees and Katniss pulled out her wrists. He got a flashlight to inspect her hands. Her right hand was pink and looked like it got blood smothered on it. He checked her other wrist and found the gaping wound, that as gushing blood. She had cut herself on a vein. He opened the first aid kit and took out a patch of cloth and a bottle of distilled water. He unscrewed the cap and pressed the cloth to the opening, letting the substance drench the cloth.

He turned his attention back to Katniss and she was ready. "This might hurt."  
"I won't feel it. I'm in enough pain." She said in an angry tone. Gale nodded and gently started to wipe away the blood on her knuckles. He watched her and she had her eyes focused on her hands. He tried to be as gentle as possible when he got to the wound that she caused with the piece of metal. She winced. "This is a deep wound. Catnip, what did you do?"

"Just clean it." She spat.

Gale cleaned her hands and her wrist with rubbing alcohol after, and then wrapped her hands up. Since they didn't have the tools for stitches, he applied medical tape to her wrist and then wrapped it in the cloth. While he put the alcohol on, Katniss burst into tears. He ignored her and continued.

Gale stayed at the doorway of the furnace room to keep an eye on Katniss as she tried to calm down for what seemed like the fiftieth time. It was about 4 A.M, and she'd been crying for 2 hours.

_I look in the mirror_

_And I try to understand_

_And piece it together_

_Wash the blood from both my hands_

She soaked her bandages in tears. Her hair would stick to her tear-soaked face. Katniss had settled down again, and was only whimpering lightly now. She ran through events in her mind.

The first time she and Peeta kissed.

The first time she asked Peeta to stay with her at night.

The first time she tilted her head, and she felt his tongue slide along hers.

The first time Peeta said, 'I love you'. And the first time she said it back.

Every 'first time' thought she had of him made the hole in her heart grow, the pain in her body intensify.

_I can't see the ending_

_There are people who know my every secret_

_I'm tired of pretending_

_You're in my heart_

_In my heart_

She kept her head between her knees and she started to rock herself slowly, as if Peeta was holding her, cradling her, covering her tear-stained cheeks with soft, gentle kisses.

"_My name is Katniss Everdeen. I am seventeen years old. I'm the Mockingjay. Peeta's dead. And I'm still here." _She whispered. She stopped breathing.

When she remembered the other person who was still alive.

_Or is she?_

This caused her to look up at the ceiling and feel more tears stream down her cheeks and her neck. She released a whispered moan and her face contracted. A high pitched squeak came from her. "Please. You have to be alive, please!" She started to yell. "Please! Please!" She called. She ripped off her vest and held her stomach. Katniss curled up into a ball, as if she was holding her baby. She cried loudly, allowing her cried to fill the room and the rest of the basement. _Not you too. _She thought. _I can't lose you too. _

Now, the baby was all she had left. When it arrived it would have Peeta's curls, Peeta's pale skin, and Peeta's amorous celestial blue eyes. She imagined a toddler boy running around with his wobbly little legs around the house Katniss lived in. She felt her heart sink to her stomach. Why was she thinking like this?

_Are we star-crossed lovers?_

_Did I really want you gone?_

_If I'm really a winner_

_Where did these demons come from?_

She gasped for air, feeling her cheeks turn hot.

What if this baby never came?

If it died, in her womb?

_I was the girl who was on fire._

The only piece left of Peeta in this world now

Was in her

Growing

Waiting.

And Katniss knew

That it wouldn't see the world

Ever.

Because she was the Mockingjay, and she was lost in this war

And she had lost

Her Boy with the Bread.


	20. Chapter 19 Part II

**I don't own The Hunger Games**

**I got to say those who said they'd stop reading amused me. You're unbelievable but hilarious. I mean when I realized Finnick died I wuz like**

"**What oh Damn what the heck why what"**

**But okay you funnies… okay back to the poker face. **

_I don't have much to say_

_There's nothing in this name_

_Sorry to disappoint again_

_Nobody pines for the listener_

_A thrill I've failed to deliver…_

It was silent.

Katniss had cried herself to sleep.

Now she lay on the floor, with her bandaged hands clutched to her chest. Everyone had found sleep. It was celestially quiet. Katniss's hair was stuck to her face, which had dried tear stains on it. There was still a sheen of sweat on her forehead. Every few minutes or so she would tremble, yelp, or release a forceful breath.

She had fallen asleep minutes ago, after several hours of grieving over Peeta. Gale fell asleep leaning against the doorframe, so he was sleeping sitting up. It was 4:13 A.M.

The silence was broken when Katniss woke up from her nightmare, releasing a single cry. Her hands quickly extended to the side, seeking Peeta's body. Her grey eyes were fixated on the dark ceiling. She breathed quickly and felt her eyes get misty. Her eyes closed and she exhaled, and felt teardrops slide down to her ears. When her eyes closed, a certain, special memory flooded her mind.

A memory that only she and Peeta had knowledge of.

One that brought them closer together as a couple.

She felt like she could still feel Peeta's lips on her hers, on her neck, on every inch of her skin, making her feel… pleasure. But she knew that he wasn't there. She wouldn't feel his careful fingers skimming the soft skin on the small of her back, on her thighs, where he always liked to touch her - without being fully sexual. The feeling was only light and gentle; she knew she couldn't pull him closer, because he was gone.

One of Katniss' trembling hands skimmed her uniform up to her breast pocket. She took out the token of the boy with the bread. Her fingertips held the dark pearl and Katniss observed it in the dark room. She closed her eyes and held the pearl against her chest with two hands. Katniss wiped her nose with her sleeve and then hesitantly held the pearl to her lips. She pressed her lips against it and formed her lips to make it appear like she was giving it a kiss. Like she was planting a soft kiss on Peeta's lips.

She could feel one of his hands on her waist, and the other cupping her cheek. She wanted to feel his real lips fitting against hers, not just a round pearl.

But this was as close as she could get to him.

Katniss felt tears build up in her eyes. She looked at Gale who was sleeping peacefully. She felt lonely. She wanted someone to speak to. Wiping away new teardrops, Katniss crawled towards him. When she was about a meter away from him Katniss stopped and observed him. She tilted her head and watched him. Thoughts ran through her mind and she started to get confused with her own beliefs.

Gale woke up as if he sensed her presence. He looked at his surroundings and jumped a little when he saw Katniss's silver eyes glaring at him. "Are you okay?" He asked uncertainly.

Katniss shrugged. Her eyes started to fill with misery and loss. It was as if they were going to stay that way forever now. Peeta's death had changed her, inside and out. She was no longer the Katniss Gale hunted with for years, not the same Katniss he'd fallen in love with.  
"Can you…" She started.

"Gale… can you… stay with me?"

Gale nodded. "Yeah… sure. I'll keep you company. If that's what you want."

"It is what I want." She nodded and moved closer."Do you miss your family?" She asked.

"Katniss, of course I miss my family." He replied firmly. "As much as you." A single tear fell from Katniss's cheek and fell on the dirty black leather of her boot. She sniffled and wiped the teardrop off the boot. The substance cleaned a patch of the dirt off the leather. Her eyes stung from the crying. With the pale light coming from outside, Gale could see her eyes, nose and mouth were all red. Her eyes and her mouth were puffy from all the mourning.

"I'm sorry, Katniss." She looked up to meet his superior grey eyes. She distressed and muddled.  
"About what?" She questioned innocently.

"Peeta."  
Katniss shook her head. "Don't be." Don't speak of him." In her last words he heard tears coming in.  
"But he sacrificed himself to save you," Katniss continued shaking her head at his words.

"Stop." She interrupted. "I…" Her brow furrowed. "Never mind."

Her bottom lip stuck out like it always did when she was upset. They didn't speak for 10 minutes. He watched her. Katniss looked around the furnace room and then down at the cold cement floor. She tucked her knees under her chin. She started to shiver and rock herself back and forth. Gale stood up and left the place he was sitting.

Katniss looked up at where he was sitting. _Where did you go?_ She felt depressed again. Why had he left?  
A few seconds passed before Gale came back to his spot with two fur blankets in hand. He handed one to Katniss and she thanked him quietly. She wrapped herself with the pelt and felt her body grow warm. She sighed in relief. But still, she needed something.

"I can't be the Mockingjay." She burst out. Her sight got blurry, her brow furrowed and her lip quivered. "Not anymore." She whined.  
"The war is nearly over, Catnip. You can do this, we're almost at the end. And you're strong. I believe in you."

Katniss felt anxiety bubble in her stomach. She wanted her medication. Except that she didn't have it. Her anxiety caused her to shiver and grow cold. The uncomfortable sensation in her belly turned into abdominal pain. She opened her mouth to speak. Her lips were wet with her saliva.

"Gale?" She wiped her tears away.

She wanted it. And she wanted it bad. She needed to feel okay; because she hadn't for the past 5 hours since the mutts appeared. "I'm still cold." She whimpered. Before Gale could get up and fetch her another blanket, she added more.

"Can you hold me?"

She kept her gaze down, too afraid to look at his. She squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for an answer. She heard the sound of rustling. "Yes."

Katniss then faced him. Grey eyes staring at grey eyes; unsure and surprised. Katniss stood up and Gale held his arms out slightly. Katniss at down in his lap but kept her arms at her own chest. Her head slowly lowered itself to Gale's chest. He watched as her raven haired head pressed against his jacket.

Katniss breathed in his scent. He smelt faintly of blood and sweat, but not enough that it became displeasing. She kept her eyes open and felt Gale's arms wrap around her shoulders. She could feel the difference between Gale's arms and Peeta's. Yes, both pairs were warm and strong, but Peeta's felt stable and more welcoming. Gale could feel Katniss snuggling her body closer, and slowly rubbing her cheek against his chest, trying to find a comfortable position.

He wanted to kiss her.

He wanted to kiss the crown of her head, press his nose into her hair near her face, and run his fingers through the soft dark waves.

"Am I going to be okay?"

"Yeah. You'll be okay."  
"I mean my wrists. Won't I get…? Tetanus? Because it was metal, what I cut my wrist on."

"You'll be okay. You'll be okay, I promise."  
"I'm scared. What if I'm not okay?"  
She didn't sound like herself.

"Nothing will happen to you. You're going to be just fine. Now just go to sleep, okay? Everything's fine."

They closed their eyes.

He was caught off guard because he realized he was facing Katniss's face. She had turned around to face him. She sat on her knees.

"What is it now?" He sighed. "Can't you just go to sleep? Are you still cold? He tried to sound comforting. Katniss shook her head,  
"I'm okay."  
"Then what is it?"  
"Nothing." And she went back to her old position. Only this time she put her hands around his neck. "Is this okay?"

Gale responded with a 'yeah'. He pulled her closer and aloud his hands to wander and skim her sides to her hips. "Is this okay?"

"Yes." He started to run his hand along her head, petting her. He felt a bump on the back of her head and he remembered her landing on her back from the explosion a day prior.

She could have anything. Tetanus. A concussion.

But she seemed okay. _Please not Tetanus. _He thought. _She has to be okay._

Gale had closed his eyes for 7 minutes when he felt Katniss stir and shift on his lap again. His eyes opened to see her.

"Catnip." He grumbled. He was almost asleep. "Katniss, please. Go to sleep. Or just go, okay?" He slowly started to push her away gently. "I know you're in emotional pain, but I want to sleep."

"So do I. But I can't. Please…Stay with me." Gale looked at her with a sad look.

He didn't want to see her like this anymore, with sadness covering her dark-ringed eyes like a blanket. It was driving him mad, plus he just wanted to see the old Katniss again. Strong, brave…

They looked at each other's eyes for a minute. After a few minutes, Katniss noticed she was sitting criss-crossed in between his legs. Her hands were on his chest and his hands were on her waist.

Gale was taken aback he and Katniss's days before the Quell when he felt her lips softly press onto his.

_She kissed me._

Katniss felt his soft lips against hers and had almost lost herself completely. This was what she needed.

A kiss.

Lips pressed against hers.

They pulled away from each other and watched each other's expression. Katniss tilted her head slightly.

Then she kissed him again, but a bit harder.

He didn't kiss back.

"Kiss me." She begged. He pulled Katniss away from himself.  
"Katniss," He sounded like he was warning her. "Are you listening to yourself?"  
"Gale." She put her hand on the back of his neck, bringing him closer. She closed her eyes for another kiss. He pulled back. "What are you doing?"  
"I just need to forget about things for a while."

Gale eyed her. "You're not mine." He said. "You love Peeta. Not me."  
"Peeta? I thought I said we wouldn't speak about him. He's dead. Therefore I don't belong to him. He doesn't belong to me. It'd be wrong to say I still love him." She sounded pleased. She sounded happy. What was wrong with her?

"I think I was wrong. You're getting Tetanus."

"Well you don't know what Tetanus is, Gale. I would be having spasms now." She said calmly.

_Concussion. She's not being herself at all. _"Kiss me." She whispered.

She was gone. The Katniss he once knew was gone. Who knew taking the boy - the blonde merchant boy- from her would change her. She was gone.

"I know you love me," Her eyes looked dreamy. "I know you want to kiss me. Peeta's gone, so it's nothing bad if you kiss me."

He took her words into hand.

She was right.

It wasn't okay with either him or Peeta to have Katniss be kissing them both. But now Peeta wasn't coming back. Was he?  
Gale felt his heart stop for a few seconds when he felt Katniss move.

He felt her move so now she straddled his hips.

"Katniss," He breathed.

He wasn't sure how he felt anymore. He wanted to kiss her, but it felt wrong.

But it was true.

She was basically all his now. He could do whatever he wanted. _They_ could do whatever they wanted.

Gale cupped her face and kissed her. Katniss tilted her head. She felt better. She just needed to feel loved.

Katniss kept her eyes sealed shut because secretly, she wanted it to be Peeta kissing her lips. She felt Gale's tongue outline her bottom lip.

Hesitantly, she opened her mouth and let his tongue touch hers.

The first time Katniss had felt his tongue slide into her mouth, the time was near the Quell. She pulled back quickly and looked uncertain about what was supposed to be her first passionate kiss.

But now she allowed it.

Because she needed it. But she felt the difference between Gale and her Peeta. When his tongue stroked the roof of her mouth she pulled away and looked between their bodies.

"More…?" She whispered. Gale gave her a questioned look. "Like… this."

Gale couldn't explain how he felt now.

To have Katniss slowly discard what she was wearing over her torso in front of him.

He watched as she unzipped her jacket. He wanted to ask so many questions. He still didn't understand. "Katniss-"

"Ssh. Let me do this. I know what I'm doing." Her silver eyes pierced his soul. He could see nothing but lust in her eyes.

Not a hint of fear.

Gale cautiously placed his hands on her ribs. Katniss rested her hands on his collarbones so her elbows touched his chest. She let her fingers slide under the hem of her shirt.

"Katniss, no." He said in a loud whisper. "You're…"

"What?"

"You're pregnant."

"Not anymore."  
"Katniss, do you know that as a fact?"

"I'm assuming. It's okay. Even if I still am it doesn't matter… it won't do any damage." Gale then let her be.

He watched in awe as she slipped her shirt over her head.

She was beautiful. Covered in scars… but he still thought she was beautiful. Gale started to do the same. When his shirt was off, Katniss looked down at his torso and ran her hands along his skin. Gale watched her and then laid her down on one of the fur blankets. She gasped. Gale started to kiss her passionately. He ran his lips along her neck and started to kiss her collarbones. She closed her eyes and moaned, imagining it was Peeta. She place her hands on his broad shoulders and felt him climb back up her body.

_And whilst I watch in silence_

_You're starting forest fires_

_You start them just to feel the heat_

He let one of his fingers glide under one of her bra straps. He started to pull the strap down. That's when she felt a twinge in her stomach. Her eyes widened and she put her hand over his, preventing his hand from moving

"What is it?" He whispered hoarsely.

The lust in her eyes was gone. She was scared. Katniss shook her head, her brow furrowing. "No. I can't do this. Not yet." She grabbed her shirt and covered her chest and bare stomach with it. Katniss wriggled and kicked. Tears built up in her eyes as Gale held her down. "What are you doing?! Get off! I said no, Gale!" She released a yelp when he held her legs down with his. He held her wrists above her head. She squirmed and squeaked. "I can't do this, let me go!" It was as if they both had exchanged moods. Her eyes looked down and saw the sign. He wanted her now, and badly. But she didn't want him. Her eyes were looking into his in alarm and misery. She begged and started to cry. "Don't hurt me. Just let me go." Gale let go of her wrists with one hand and trailed it along her stomach. He felt her skin twitch under his fingertip. He could see her breathing fast. "I'm finishing what you started."

Katniss stared at him in disgust. "What? I dont want to do this. I said _no_. We're not going this."

Fear started to settle in. He wasn't listening. He ran his fingers between her breasts, causing her to wriggle violently. "Get your hands off! Stop it, Gale!" She hissed, tears starting to sting in her eyes from frustration. "Get off of me! Let me go, please!"

He could tell she was on the verge of crying. "Shh."

Anger and worry shone in her eyes. "Get off." She whispered angrily. "Get off, Gale. Get off!"

Gale was able to reach the door with his foot. He closed it so he could barely see the glint of tears in her eyes.

"Be good." He hissed in her ear.

She tried to shove him off her body. "You stupid shit. Dont you dare touch me." She snarled.

"Like I said. We're finishing what you started."

Now she understood. She noticed what he was going to do. Why? Why was he doing this? This wasn't the boy she met in the wood 6 years ago. Nothing close.

"No, Gale, please!" Katniss pleaded. Tears started to come down her face when she realized she couldnt get away from him now. His whole body was laid on top of hers. Her small frame didnt stand a chance. She whimpered and begged more and more, begging for him to stop and let her go. His touch froze her, leaving her in shock. No one had ever touched her like this before. Only Peeta. And she didnt trust Gale anymore. She never would ever again. He released her wrists. Katniss laid in her spot and felt his hands pull her pants down. "Please don't do this." She cried. She was left with only her underwear on. He kissed her hard and she tried to pull away. He grabbed a fist of her hair and pulled her head down so she was forced to kiss him. Every time she tried to get up, he would pull her down, and pin her to the ground, making her breathing difficult with his weight on her. He stripped her down completely. The feeling of his bare chest on hers scared her. His hand went where it wanted. Her breasts. Between her legs. His fingers would move between her legs and she would stare at him, shocked and disgusted. He forced two fingers inside of her and Katniss gasped. Gale's lips hovered over her breasts and her lips and her neck. Katniss kept her eyes shut as his lips moved along her skin.

"I can see why they call you Girl on Fire,"

She was too shocked and frightened to even respond.

Her eyes shot open when she heard him fumbling with his belt.

_The stranger, his sorrow_

_Must be fault of my own_

Her fear was growing and she could feel her heart beating at a horribly fast rate.

She was begging him to stop. Tears continued to poor down her face. She was so powerless against him. He pressed his lips to her neck, then taking a strong bite, making Katniss flinch. "Stop," She blubbered.

We're almost done." He whispered.

He made their bodies aligned.

And soon, she was crying from agony.


	21. Chapter 20

**I don't own The Hunger Games**

**I got to say those who said they'd stop reading amused me. You're unbelievable but hilarious. I mean when I realized Finnick died I wuz like**

"**What oh Damn what the heck why what"**

**But okay you funnies… okay back to the poker face. **

_I don't have much to say_

_There's nothing in this name_

_Sorry to disappoint again_

_Nobody pines for the listener_

_A thrill I've failed to deliver…_

It was silent.

Katniss had cried herself to sleep.

Now she lay on the floor, with her bandaged hands clutched to her chest. Everyone had found sleep. It was celestially quiet. Katniss's hair was stuck to her face, which had dried tear stains on it. There was still a sheen of sweat on her forehead. Every few minutes or so she would tremble, yelp, or release a forceful breath.

She had fallen asleep minutes ago, after several hours of grieving over Peeta. Gale fell asleep leaning against the doorframe, so he was sleeping sitting up. It was 4:13 A.M.

The silence was broken when Katniss woke up from her nightmare, releasing a single cry. Her hands quickly extended to the side, seeking Peeta's body. Her grey eyes were fixated on the dark ceiling. She breathed quickly and felt her eyes get misty. Her eyes closed and she exhaled, and felt teardrops slide down to her ears. When her eyes closed, a certain, special memory flooded her mind.

A memory that only she and Peeta had knowledge of.

One that brought them closer together as a couple.

She felt like she could still feel Peeta's lips on her hers, on her neck, on every inch of her skin, making her feel… pleasure. But she knew that he wasn't there. She wouldn't feel his careful fingers skimming the soft skin on the small of her back, on her thighs, where he always liked to touch her - without being fully sexual. The feeling was only light and gentle; she knew she couldn't pull him closer, because he was gone.

One of Katniss' trembling hands skimmed her uniform up to her breast pocket. She took out the token of the boy with the bread. Her fingertips held the dark pearl and Katniss observed it in the dark room. She closed her eyes and held the pearl against her chest with two hands. Katniss wiped her nose with her sleeve and then hesitantly held the pearl to her lips. She pressed her lips against it and formed her lips to make it appear like she was giving it a kiss. Like she was planting a soft kiss on Peeta's lips.

She could feel one of his hands on her waist, and the other cupping her cheek. She wanted to feel his real lips fitting against hers, not just a round pearl.

But this was as close as she could get to him.

Katniss felt tears build up in her eyes. She looked at Gale who was sleeping peacefully. She felt lonely. She wanted someone to speak to. Wiping away new teardrops, Katniss crawled towards him. When she was about a meter away from him Katniss stopped and observed him. She tilted her head and watched him. Thoughts ran through her mind and she started to get confused with her own beliefs.

Gale woke up as if he sensed her presence. He looked at his surroundings and jumped a little when he saw Katniss's silver eyes glaring at him. "Are you okay?" He asked uncertainly.

Katniss shrugged. Her eyes started to fill with misery and loss. It was as if they were going to stay that way forever now. Peeta's death had changed her, inside and out. She was no longer the Katniss Gale hunted with for years, not the same Katniss he'd fallen in love with.  
"Can you…" She started.

"Gale… can you… stay with me?"

Gale nodded. "Yeah… sure. I'll keep you company. If that's what you want."

"It is what I want." She nodded and moved closer."Do you miss your family?" She asked.

"Katniss, of course I miss my family." He replied firmly. "As much as you." A single tear fell from Katniss's cheek and fell on the dirty black leather of her boot. She sniffled and wiped the teardrop off the boot. The substance cleaned a patch of the dirt off the leather. Her eyes stung from the crying. With the pale light coming from outside, Gale could see her eyes, nose and mouth were all red. Her eyes and her mouth were puffy from all the mourning.

"I'm sorry, Katniss." She looked up to meet his superior grey eyes. She distressed and muddled.  
"About what?" She questioned innocently.

"Peeta."  
Katniss shook her head. "Don't be." Don't speak of him." In her last words he heard tears coming in.  
"But he sacrificed himself to save you," Katniss continued shaking her head at his words.

"Stop." She interrupted. "I…" Her brow furrowed. "Never mind."

Her bottom lip stuck out like it always did when she was upset. They didn't speak for 10 minutes. He watched her. Katniss looked around the furnace room and then down at the cold cement floor. She tucked her knees under her chin. She started to shiver and rock herself back and forth. Gale stood up and left the place he was sitting.

Katniss looked up at where he was sitting. _Where did you go?_ She felt depressed again. Why had he left?  
A few seconds passed before Gale came back to his spot with two fur blankets in hand. He handed one to Katniss and she thanked him quietly. She wrapped herself with the pelt and felt her body grow warm. She sighed in relief. But still, she needed something.

"I can't be the Mockingjay." She burst out. Her sight got blurry, her brow furrowed and her lip quivered. "Not anymore." She whined.  
"The war is nearly over, Catnip. You can do this, we're almost at the end. And you're strong. I believe in you."

Katniss felt anxiety bubble in her stomach. She wanted her medication. Except that she didn't have it. Her anxiety caused her to shiver and grow cold. The uncomfortable sensation in her belly turned into abdominal pain. She opened her mouth to speak. Her lips were wet with her saliva.

"Gale?" She wiped her tears away.

She wanted it. And she wanted it bad. She needed to feel okay; because she hadn't for the past 5 hours since the mutts appeared. "I'm still cold." She whimpered. Before Gale could get up and fetch her another blanket, she added more.

"Can you hold me?"

She kept her gaze down, too afraid to look at his. She squeezed her eyes shut, waiting for an answer. She heard the sound of rustling. "Yes."

Katniss then faced him. Grey eyes staring at grey eyes; unsure and surprised. Katniss stood up and Gale held his arms out slightly. Katniss at down in his lap but kept her arms at her own chest. Her head slowly lowered itself to Gale's chest. He watched as her raven haired head pressed against his jacket.

Katniss breathed in his scent. He smelt faintly of blood and sweat, but not enough that it became displeasing. She kept her eyes open and felt Gale's arms wrap around her shoulders. She could feel the difference between Gale's arms and Peeta's. Yes, both pairs were warm and strong, but Peeta's felt stable and more welcoming. Gale could feel Katniss snuggling her body closer, and slowly rubbing her cheek against his chest, trying to find a comfortable position.

He wanted to kiss her.

He wanted to kiss the crown of her head, press his nose into her hair near her face, and run his fingers through the soft dark waves.

"Am I going to be okay?"

"Yeah. You'll be okay."  
"I mean my wrists. Won't I get…? Tetanus? Because it was metal, what I cut my wrist on."

"You'll be okay. You'll be okay, I promise."  
"I'm scared. What if I'm not okay?"  
She didn't sound like herself.

"Nothing will happen to you. You're going to be just fine. Now just go to sleep, okay? Everything's fine."

They closed their eyes.

He was caught off guard because he realized he was facing Katniss's face. She had turned around to face him. She sat on her knees.

"What is it now?" He sighed. "Can't you just go to sleep? Are you still cold? He tried to sound comforting. Katniss shook her head,  
"I'm okay."  
"Then what is it?"  
"Nothing." And she went back to her old position. Only this time she put her hands around his neck. "Is this okay?"

Gale responded with a 'yeah'. He pulled her closer and aloud his hands to wander and skim her sides to her hips. "Is this okay?"

"Yes." He started to run his hand along her head, petting her. He felt a bump on the back of her head and he remembered her landing on her back from the explosion a day prior.

She could have anything. Tetanus. A concussion.

But she seemed okay. _Please not Tetanus. _He thought. _She has to be okay._

Gale had closed his eyes for 7 minutes when he felt Katniss stir and shift on his lap again. His eyes opened to see her.

"Catnip." He grumbled. He was almost asleep. "Katniss, please. Go to sleep. Or just go, okay?" He slowly started to push her away gently. "I know you're in emotional pain, but I want to sleep."

"So do I. But I can't. Please…Stay with me." Gale looked at her with a sad look.

He didn't want to see her like this anymore, with sadness covering her dark-ringed eyes like a blanket. It was driving him mad, plus he just wanted to see the old Katniss again. Strong, brave…

They looked at each other's eyes for a minute. After a few minutes, Katniss noticed she was sitting criss-crossed in between his legs. Her hands were on his chest and his hands were on her waist.

Gale was taken aback he and Katniss's days before the Quell when he felt her lips softly press onto his.

_She kissed me._

Katniss felt his soft lips against hers and had almost lost herself completely. This was what she needed.

A kiss.

Lips pressed against hers.

They pulled away from each other and watched each other's expression. Katniss tilted her head slightly.

Then she kissed him again, but a bit harder.

He didn't kiss back.

"Kiss me." She begged. He pulled Katniss away from himself.  
"Katniss," He sounded like he was warning her. "Are you listening to yourself?"  
"Gale." She put her hand on the back of his neck, bringing him closer. She closed her eyes for another kiss. He pulled back. "What are you doing?"  
"I just need to forget about things for a while."

Gale eyed her. "You're not mine." He said. "You love Peeta. Not me."  
"Peeta? I thought I said we wouldn't speak about him. He's dead. Therefore I don't belong to him. He doesn't belong to me. It'd be wrong to say I still love him." She sounded pleased. She sounded happy. What was wrong with her?

"I think I was wrong. You're getting Tetanus."

"Well you don't know what Tetanus is, Gale. I would be having spasms now." She said calmly.

_Concussion. She's not being herself at all. _"Kiss me." She whispered.

She was gone. The Katniss he once knew was gone. Who knew taking the boy - the blonde merchant boy- from her would change her. She was gone.

"I know you love me," Her eyes looked dreamy. "I know you want to kiss me. Peeta's gone, so it's nothing bad if you kiss me."

He took her words into hand.

She was right.

It wasn't okay with either him or Peeta to have Katniss be kissing them both. But now Peeta wasn't coming back. Was he?  
Gale felt his heart stop for a few seconds when he felt Katniss move.

He felt her move so now she straddled his hips.

"Katniss," He breathed.

He wasn't sure how he felt anymore. He wanted to kiss her, but it felt wrong.

But it was true.

She was basically all his now. He could do whatever he wanted. _They_ could do whatever they wanted.

Gale cupped her face and kissed her. Katniss tilted her head. She felt better. She just needed to feel loved.

Katniss kept her eyes sealed shut because secretly, she wanted it to be Peeta kissing her lips. She felt Gale's tongue outline her bottom lip.

Hesitantly, she opened her mouth and let his tongue touch hers.

The first time Katniss had felt his tongue slide into her mouth, the time was near the Quell. She pulled back quickly and looked uncertain about what was supposed to be her first passionate kiss.

But now she allowed it.

Because she needed it. But she felt the difference between Gale and her Peeta. When his tongue stroked the roof of her mouth she pulled away and looked between their bodies.

"More…?" She whispered. Gale gave her a questioned look. "Like… this."

Gale couldn't explain how he felt now.

To have Katniss slowly discard what she was wearing over her torso in front of him.

He watched as she unzipped her jacket. He wanted to ask so many questions. He still didn't understand. "Katniss-"

"Ssh. Let me do this. I know what I'm doing." Her silver eyes pierced his soul. He could see nothing but lust in her eyes.

Not a hint of fear.

Gale cautiously placed his hands on her ribs. Katniss rested her hands on his collarbones so her elbows touched his chest. She let her fingers slide under the hem of her shirt.

"Katniss, no." He said in a loud whisper. "You're…"

"What?"

"You're pregnant."

"Not anymore."  
"Katniss, do you know that as a fact?"

"I'm assuming. It's okay. Even if I still am it doesn't matter… it won't do any damage." Gale then let her be.

He watched in awe as she slipped her shirt over her head.

She was beautiful.

Covered in scars… but he still thought she was beautiful. Gale started to do the same. When his shirt was off, Katniss looked down at his torso and ran her hands along his skin.

Gale watched her and then laid her down on one of the fur blankets. She gasped.

Gale started to kiss her passionately. He ran his lips along her neck and started to kiss her collarbones. She closed her eyes and moaned, imagining it was Peeta. She place her hands on his broad shoulders and felt him climb back up her body.

_And whilst I watch in silence_

_You're starting forest fires_

_You start them just to feel the heat_

He let one of his fingers glide under one of her bra straps. He started to pull the strap down. That's when she felt a twinge in her stomach. Her eyes widened.

"Wait!" She yelped.

"What is it?" He whispered hoarsely.

The lust in her eyes was gone. She was scared. "Gale," She started to breathe heavily. "Get off of me!" She grabbed her shirt and covered her chest and bare stomach with it. Katniss wriggled and kicked. Tears built up in her eyes as Gale held her down. She begged for him to let her go. "I don't want you! I can't! Gale! Please! Let me go!" She released a yelp when he held her legs down with his. He held her wrists above her head. She squirmed and squeaked. "I can't do this, let me go!" It was as if they both had exchanged moods. Her eyes looked down and saw the sign. He wanted her now, and badly. But she didn't want him. Her eyes were looking into his in alarm and misery. She begged and started to cry. "Don't hurt me. Just let me go." Gale let go of her wrists with one hand and trailed it along her stomach. He felt her skin twitch under his fingertip. He could see her breathing fast.

"Catnip,"  
"Don't call me that! Gale, get off of me!"

"We have to finish what you started."  
His words shocked her and she started to panic.

"No…" She whispered in fear. Gale was able to reach the door with his foot. He closed it so he could barely see the glint of tears in her eyes.

"Be good." He hissed in her ear. She whimpered and begged more at every word he said, pleading for him to stop and let her go. His touch froze her and he released her wrists. Katniss laid in her spot and felt his hands pull her pants down. "Please don't do this." She cried. She was left with only her underwear on. He kissed her hard and she tried to pull away. But every time she tried to get up, he would pull her down, and pin her to the ground, making her breathing difficult with his weight on her. He stripped her completely. So she was nude beneath him The feeling of his bare chest on hers scared her. His hand went where it wanted. Her breasts. Between her legs. His fingers would move between her legs and she would stare at him, shocked. He forced two fingers inside of her and Katniss gasped. She didn't like this. Peeta never did that. This was painful. Gale's lips hovered over her breasts and her lips and her neck. Katniss kept her eyes shut as his lips moved along her skin. Her eyes shot open when she heard him fumbling with his belt.

_The stranger, his sorrow_

_Must be fault of my own_

He made their bodies aligned. The fear in Katniss's eyes was growing.

She was sweating and begging.

And soon she was crying from pain.


	22. Chapter 21

**IMPORTANT: Just so y'all know I already know how the story is gonna go. I have planned out all the details in a notebook so I'm basically done. So don't try to convince me to change anything because I'M DONE WITH THE WHOLE STORY! JUST GOTTA POST IT! The number of chapters will be about 30 range I think…**

**Just want to tell everyone I didn't enjoy writing the end of the last chapter **

**Don't even bother asking why I did that. I just did, it's part of the plot! I thought about adding that smut scene while there were about 9 chapters up, way back**

**Yesss, my dumplings, chapter 9! That Galeniss scene was in mind alllll along. Oh and Peeta's death (okay yes I said it, DEATH) was planned like when there were 4 chapters up, I'm not kidding. "Breathe it all in children." **

**The reason why Katniss became coo-coo was because she needed Peeta, she wanted and needed him, but because he was dead, she needed human closeness and comfort from anyone. But of course she never would have thought she'd change her mind in the last minute, and never would have thought Gale would rape her.**

**Those of you who no longer want to read are welcome to leave if they please. I respect your guys' opinions, I know lots of yuhs were crying and had the craving to **_**"punch Gale's head into his chest cavity"**_**, **_**it's**_** your guys' choice. **

**Keep leaving reviews, whether you're mad sad rad or bad idk/c just do it. **

_It's hard letting go_

_I'm finally at peace but it feels wrong_

_Slow I'm getting up_

_My hands and feet are weaker than before_

Her body twitched.

Katniss let out quiet and small mumbles and whimpers. Even the occasional moan.

She could feel the cold cement floor through her clothing. Not too long ago she had gotten out of Gale's grasp, because he had fallen asleep. She was able to find her clothing.

Now she lay by the door.

Somehow, Gale had made him and Katniss move all the way up to the corner of the furnace room while Katniss was on her back.

Maybe it was her wriggling and squirming that had helped. Because after all Gale was hovering above her the entire time.

Katniss had been weeping for several minutes now. She was lying on her belly in a weird position, with her hips twisted sideways and her hands up by her face. Her top row of teeth was on the cement floor. Under her head, the cement flooring was wet with saliva, tears and sweat.

What had she done?

Why did she have to kiss him?  
If it weren't for the kiss, she'd be asleep.

Dreaming of Peeta. Of Prim. Her father.

Now she sobbed silently. Feeling nothing in her stomach but remorse.

_My name is Katniss Everdeen. _She thought. _There's no one who cares about me anymore._ _I'm still the Mockingjay. Peeta's gone. Peeta is dead. I'm…_

Another wave of grief washed over her. _"I'm a slut." _She said aloud.

What was it going to be like, when everyone woke up? When they headed to Snow's mansion. Was she even going to be able to make it that far? It's hard letting go

_And you _

_Are folded on the bed _

_Where I rest my head_

_There's nothing I can see, _

_Darkness becomes me._

And even if she did, she wouldn't make it home. Home with Prim. With her mother.

She was exhausted.

Worn down. She had only gotten about 35 minutes of sleep. This whole night, Katniss was too afraid to sleep. Too afraid to have a nightmare without Peeta by her side. Knowing Peeta's eyes were open and dead somewhere.

Now she was terrified. She was shivering from the cold and from her fear. Her fingernails clawed at the floor and a disturbing sound entered her ears. Her eyes were red from staying awake and from crying. She had cried enough.

That's when she heard it.

Movement. Her body froze and she cautiously turned her head to see Gale's figure in the dark room.

Still as a statue.

It was someone outside. Someone was awake. She felt relieved for some reason. Slowly, Katniss lifted her torso. She was greeted by an ache.

She gasped quietly and froze. She looked down at her abdomen, where she felt the pain start.

But she recognized it. It felt familiar. She moved on purpose again. Then the pain spread to between her legs.

She was sore.

Katniss grunted in pain and she tried to sit up. When she managed to, she kept her legs close to her chest and felt the pain wash over her body.

Katniss released gasps and grunts of discomfort. She recalled first feeling sore the night after she and Peeta—

She stopped. She didn't dare think about Peeta. Not now. A beeping noise pierced the silent air. The air was taken out of her lungs. Gale was going to wake up. It was his alarm from his radio.

She saw him sit up and she scrambled deeper until she hit the furnace, hoping she could camouflage into the black walls. The beeping stopped. She watched him put his clothes on and then he looked around.

He was looking for her.

Katniss's breathing grew faster. She could feel her heart beating at a fast rate, as if it was bumping into her chest. Her fear made her released a whinge.

She covered her mouth and sealed her eyes shut, forcing tears out.

She kept herself immobile in the corner and listened to Gale. Pale light flooded the dark room. She opened one of her eyes and saw that the door was open. Gale had left.

She released a breath and let her head fall back to rest on the wall. It was as if fear, worry, soreness, remorse and depression was written on her forehead. That was all she had felt the whole night. Even her hands and her wrist had grown sore.

There was speaking coming from outside. Loud whispers and murmurs. Everyone was probably awake now.

Maybe they were awake the whole night.

Katniss had kept them all awake probably. It was nothing but crying and screaming the whole time. The screaming that had filled the basement around 4 in the morning was probably the worst.

A combination of shrieking, pleading, crying and Gale's name.

And screams of agony.

"_**NO! Gale! Please! NO! Stop, please!"**_

Her body shuddered at the memory of her screaming when she was being raped.

_Raped._

The word rolled over her tongue and her body trembled.

It wasn't long until Finnick came into the furnace room looking for Katniss.  
"Katniss? I'm pretty sure you're in here."

She recognized his voice and she relaxed.

"Katniss,"

Slowly, Katniss came out of her hiding spot and Finnick saw her come out of the shadows. He could see the dark circles under her eyes.

"Hey. C'mon, there's food out here."  
She didn't answer. "I want to say how sorry I am." Finnick sighed. "About Peeta. But he died protecting you."

Katniss wiped her nose on her sleeve. She nodded in agreement. Finnick made a movement with his head as if telling her to come. Instead, Katniss stayed glued to the cold floor.

"Alright, girl on fire." He walked towards her and grasped her hands and pulled her up. She winced when she felt the soreness grow. "There you go. Is it nice in that room?"  
She was mute at the moment. "It seemed pretty cozy in there."

_If only you knew._ _How did you not hear anything? _

Katniss walked out with Finnick following her.

She felt uncomfortable being surrounded by so many people now.

When they walked upstairs, Tigris had prepared them a hash of food for everyone. It had a nice aroma.

But Katniss was too anxious to even eat. She was being urged by everyone- except Gale of course- to eat. Because everyone knew she didn't sleep.

Gale was several meters away from her and she didn't dare look up at him.

She got glimpse of him from the corner of her eye. Katniss took small bites of food, feeling like it would come right back up. Pollux could see nothing but sorrow on her face. Her eyebrows formed in a shape that meant nothing but sadness.

Cressida was speaking with Tigris about how the rest of the mission would go. If Katniss wasn't crying, she was on the verge to. Every thought made more tears get ready to spill. She imagined Gale was eating with a smirk on his face.

He probably was happy as fuck.

In fact, while Gale was forcefully kissing her, he whispered in her ear that he was about to lose his virginity. Katniss began sobbing when he had said that.

She wasn't a virgin, but the reason she cried was because she didn't want to take it from Gale.

He didn't deserve it to be taken.

Especially by her.

"Katniss, are you still up for killing Snow?" Finnick asked. Katniss looked at the floor. She trembled and she grew anxious.

She opened her mouth to speak. "Yes." She whispered quietly.

That's when Cressida's radio started buzzing.


	23. Chapter 22

_You did not break me_

_I'm still fighting for peace_

The squad listened carefully. There were inaudible voices in the background. Cressida moved the radio in the air to get a better signal. Instead, it caused the fuzziness to quiet down. Finnick and Gale's radios had started to sound too. Katniss and Pollux watched the three as they stood up and tried to get better signal.

Gale quickly gave up and returned to his spot. Finnick put his radio against the window and the fuzziness ceased partially. He could hear the voice.

"451, 451."

The voice said. Finnick was about to respond when Cressida stopped him.

"Don't say anything. It could be Peacekeepers."

"So they know the name of our squad?" Katniss looked at Finnick who was playing with the knob that was made to make the signal clear.

"Most likely. They probably found something saying '451' on Boggs."  
The voice grew unclear again.

"So they might be trying to lure us into a trap?" Gale asked.

Cressida nodded.

"But they know we're not stupid. What kind of trap would they set up?"  
"Pods, maybe."  
"And how would they lure us in? Saying Peeta's over there?" He said on purpose.

Katniss felt something prick in her chest. She stood up, suddenly looking hostile and infuriated.

"What did you say?!"

She roared. "Take that back!"

Instead Gale just looked at her. "You take that back, Gale." She said firmly.

"Or what?" He raised his eyebrows at her. He looked emotionless. It was as if his gaze was sending her a message.

_Want me to do__** it**__ again?_

Katniss's eyes were scorched with fire. She walked quickly towards him and raised a fist. She struck him across the face which quickly sent Cressida and Finnick pulling her away from Gale.

"You goddamned idiot!" She shrieked. "Don't talk about Peeta! Never talk about him ever again!" Her breathing became harder because she was using so much momentum to pull away from the others' grips. Eventually she did and she lunged at Gale. She screamed hideous things at him and punched him, each blow sending more tears down her own cheeks.

"You fucking bastard!" Gale pulled her wrists behind her head so Finnick and Cressida could pull her off.

Katniss screamed at Gale as she thrashed.

"Let go!" She demanded. Her face was wet with sweat and tears. They dragged her back to where she was before she attacked Gale.

She pressed her knees against her chest and hid her face. Tigris realized Katniss wasn't going to eat anything, so she gave her a glass of water.

Katniss drank it slowly and felt replenished quickly. She wiped her tears away.

The radio was still buzzing. They had kept it on because there was still a voice luring them that popped up every few minutes.

They were just waiting for more speech to come from the Peacekeepers on the other side.

Katniss looked down at her bandaged hands. Slowly she tore the bandages off of her knuckles. She kept the one on her wrist on though. The moment her scraped and bruised knuckles were touched by the oxygen they started to sting. There was raw flesh on them with dried flecks of blood. She let her tears fall freely and took out her pearl. She whimpered and made noises and listened to the radio.

The hole in her heart grew and she started to bite at her nails, which had reached their limit of 'shortness'. She put away her pearl. A stinging sensation overcame her hand and she trembled. The skin underneath the nail turned red and she felt herself tug at her nail which ripped a piece of skin off. Slowly, blood seeped from the edge of her fingernail. She continued doing this until all of her fingers stung and were either red, or bleeding.

She accepted the pain and had the thought of stabbing herself with an arrow.

_Peeta, _she thought, as if speaking to him. _Why didn't I just go with you?_

"_It's not too late. It never is. You could, if you really want to, Katniss." _

_I do, Peeta. I do._

"_Then why don't you? You love me, right?"  
Yes. And all I want right now is to be with you._

"_And you can. Come with me."  
I want to go with you. I really do. But I can't leave now… they need me…_

"_I suppose that is true. They can't continue without their leader."  
Can't you just come back to me? Us? That'd be better for the three of us. You me and the baby.  
"I can't, Katniss. It's like a one-way mirror. But now that I realize it… you should stay. I'll guard you from up here."  
But I need you._

"_No, Katniss. You'd be making a fool out of yourself if you came with me. I sacrificed myself to save you so you could finish this war. So you could raise our baby in a safer world without the Games, unlike the one we grew up in."_

_I can't raise our baby. That is, if it's alive-_

"_Katniss, stop. It's going to be okay. You can't just think its dead. I know what I did and I know you're going to be a great mother."_

_And how do you know that, Peeta? I'm still a girl! I'm too young to raise a baby on my own! The baby will need you. So will the mother. _

"_You'll be okay. You'll still have part of me with you."  
Not true. I'll never have you back, Peeta._

"_No. True, Katniss. You're carrying my baby, aren't you?"  
Oh. I see what you mean. But if something happens to the baby… then … you'll be gone from me forever._

"_Katniss, you have to be strong."_

Katniss closed her eyes and they stung, too. She didn't know what to do.

Stay and raise the baby on her own?

Or go with Peeta?

After all… their baby would go too.

Thinking about the baby made Katniss's body shudder until her tears ran like streams down her red cheeks. She buried her face into her hands so the others couldn't see her cry.

She fell over and crumpled herself into a little ball and mourned. _Stop it! Stop crying for one second! Forget about Peeta! Move on! _

The radio's noises were giving her a headache. She covered her ears and rocked herself on the ground.

_When am I supposed to run out of tears?_

She opened her eyes to see that all of their weapons, including her bow and arrows were piled up against the wall, about 2 meters away from where she was.

Weak from hunger and no sleep, Katniss crawled on her stomach towards the pile. She was able to lock her fingers around an arrow.

She pulled it out of the quiver and held it in her hand, observing the sharpened side of it.

"Katniss," Cressida warned. "Put the arrow down."

It was as if everyone knew that she couldn't live without Peeta. Like they all knew Katniss was still wanting to commit suicide.

Instead, Katniss ignored her as if Cressida was a mock.

Katniss began to graze the blade along her fingers.

"Katniss," Her voice intensified.

"Put it down." Finnick demanded. "Don't make us come over there."

Katniss kept her eyes pasted to the blade. Quickly Finnick leapt towards her and tried to rip the arrow out of her hands. Like a child, Katniss screamed and started to pull back.

"No!" She screeched. Finnick twisted the arrow out of her hand, and pulled hard, causing her to get two small cuts on each palm. He then tossed it back into the pile.

"Katniss, you have to stop acting like this, okay?" Cressida said to her.

The lectured her like parents and the whole time she ignored them, at the same time, crying.

After several minutes, Katniss's eyes started to droop by themselves. She didn't want to sleep. She couldn't stand the thought of having a strong nightmare without Peeta.

The other problem was that she wouldn't make it a mile without food or sleep.

So she chose the simplest option. _Eat._

And slowly, she ate. Feeling repulsed by every bite, knowing that if Peeta were here the food wouldn't sicken her. Or if she knew Peeta was fine.

Or in this case, he wasn't. He was gone.

Katniss ate about half of the food and that's when Tigris finally took her plate away.

"You can sleep if you want, Katniss." Cressida fiddled with the radio. "You need it."

Katniss nodded and her eyes closed like a door being slammed shut.

In her dream she felt herself going weak and Peeta lifting her up over and over again. She would tell him she couldn't go on for much longer. Every time Peeta turned his back or she was out of his sight, she would lay down and could feel herself slipping away into the hands of death. But Peeta would always find her and pick her up again, forcing her to stand up. Katniss's legs couldn't support her anymore, and she kept falling to the ground. Peeta then started to carry her, but soon he went weak too, and put Katniss down since she was slipping. He begged and begged for her to get up, shaking her awake, trying to prevent her from sleeping- because he knew if she did he would lose her.

When she screamed herself awake, and it seemed like her screaming triggered something on the other end of the radio.

"_**Katniss!"**_

Katniss felt her body go numb.

"_Peeta?"_

Katniss pulled herself up onto her feet and sat down next to Cressida quickly. She snatched the radio from her hand and pressed it against her ear.

She heard panting and whimpers.

It was him.

"Peeta!"

"Katniss? Katniss! Are you okay?!" 

"…Peeta…!"

Instantly tears built up in her eyes and spilt onto the radio. She cried and pressed her lips against the radio.

"Katniss, are you okay? What's going on, are you safe? Are you hurt?"

"It's you," She mumbled. "You're alive!"  
"Yes, Katniss. I'm still here. Why were you screaming? Are you okay?"

"I had a nightmare," She cried. "But I'm okay, we're all safe, Peeta." She spoke quickly.

Cressida and Finnick approached Katniss as she spoke to Peeta with tears flowing down her face.

"Peeta, where are you?" Cressida asked.

"Are you hurt?" Katniss cried.

"I'm fine. I'm in the tunnels, but I can't get out. The lighting here dropped after the explosion, so I can't wander either."

"We'll come get you, Peeta! Stay where you are, we're coming." Cressida pulled Katniss away from the radio.  
"It's risky."

"We're not leaving him. Not again. I won't go without him."

"Katniss-"

"No!" She grabbed the radio again and spoke to Peeta.

She couldn't believe it. How was he alive? If he was it meant he had survived an army of Peacekeepers and frenzied lizard mutts.

And Gale's attempt at killing him.

Katniss knew he had thrown the Holo on purpose. Partially.

…And his attempt at killing her lover worked. He was able to get what he wanted from her, even if it meant being rough.

Meanwhile, Katniss continued crying.

"Where are you?"  
"We're in Tigris's store. She's a friend of Cressida and Plutarch. She knows who we are and she can be trusted."  
"I can see that. You sound like you're good. Despite the crying."  
"I am." She chuckled. "Peeta… you're really okay?"  
"Yes, Katniss. I promise you. I'm fine, all good. You?"

She nodded. "I'm… good. Fine. Didn't get much sleep last night but… I'm okay. For now."  
"What? Why didn't you sleep?"

The fuzziness returned And Peeta's voice was muffled.

"Peeta? Peeta?!"  
He replied through the strange noise.

"Yeah? It's okay, the signal's just poor. I'm okay."

"Well… anyways, the reason I didn't sleep was… because I couldn't without you next to me," She exhaled. "I was mourning all night."

On the other end, Peeta smiled a sad smile.

"I was worried that they would find you. Even after I made myself a martyr to save you and the others."  
Katniss shed new tears. "Please stop being like that."  
"Like what?"  
"So… selfless." She replied. "That's what I hate about you. Never do something like that ever again, Peeta. Ever. And if you do, it won't come in handy, because I'll end up killing myself."  
"Katniss…"

"I mean it. Stop sacrificing yourself for me. Guard me, but don't put your life on the line."

"I can't help it. I love you."

Then Katniss was silent. She sighed.

"Katniss?"  
"I'm still here. You don't have to explain the rest, I know you love me."  
"You know those words by mind, I'm guessing."  
"I do. A little."  
She heard Peeta chortle. Katniss saw as everyone began to put on their gear.

"You don't know how good it feels to hear your voice."

"Oh yeah?" Katniss began to wipe away her tears. "Same here. I needed to hear yours."

"Now I just need to touch you."

Katniss was immediately turned off. "Peeta." Her voice sounded grave and bothered.

"Woops. No, by 'touch', I meant it affectionately and platonically. Not… you know. Save that for later. When were alone, in some safe place. Whenever that may be."  
"I suppose…" She blushed and felt unsure about doing anything intimate with Peeta.

Not after her scarring experience with Gale. Just closing her eyes could scare her and make it feel like it wasn't Peeta who was with her.

"Katniss, get ready to go." Finnick threw her vest at her. "That is, if you want to see Peeta again."

She nodded and stood up. Quickly, she strapped on her vest over her jacket.  
"We're coming to get you, Peeta."  
She heard Peeta let out a breathy laugh. "Okay." He replied firmly. "I love you. And thank you,"  
"'Thank you?' What are you thanking me for? There's nothing to thank me about, Peeta."

"You're rescuing me."

"Of course I am, you ass. I need you with me. I fucking love you."

"I fucking love you more."

It made Katniss happy to hear Peeta trying to cheer her up with jokes.

Katniss rolled her eyes and picked up the radio. She handed it to Cressida. "Here."

"No. You keep it. You're going to need it."

"Are you sure?"  
"Yes." Cressida pushed the handset radio towards Katniss. She nodded. "Thank you." She replied.

"You still there?" She asked Peeta.

"Yup. I'm safe and sound. I'll be okay here, Katniss. Don't worry if the signal cuts out. Just remember signals are effected with the war and everything."

"Right."

Katniss pulled her hair back in a ponytail and got the rest of her gear on. She slipped her quiver over her shoulder and kept her bow in hand.

It was at Cressida's suggestion that they disguise themselves as Capitol civilians, and Tigris gave them large cloaks with hoods.

Katniss wrapped a steel blue colored cloak around herself and stuffed a dark green one in her pack for Peeta.

The moment they opened the door Katniss felt anxiety starting to fizz in her stomach and the signal was lost.

Everyone but Katniss lead the way to the tunnels, since she had been sedated while they escaped.

It came to her how Gale had gotten her out. With the help of everyone else they lifted her out of the tunnels, but what she wondered was how he had carried her across the city without being slowed down or sighted so easily.

Everyone's attention would be caught by someone carrying a 'dead' girl, especially in the Capitol.

Every once in a while the radio would beep and Peeta's calm voice would come through it.

Cressida ended up being the leader that led everyone through stairwells and valleys until they reached a light blue apartment with half of the side blown off.

Katniss kept a large amount of distance between her and Gale.

Not only did she scorn him now but she also felt a great amount of fear from him.

She wasn't looking forward to having those 'alone' moments with Peeta that he had talked about. She was frightened even though she knew he would never hurt her.

The group entered a long hall with a staircase leading back down to the tunnels. Katniss saw the silver door at the end of the hallway and got scared. She turned off the radio and slowly went down the stairs.

She pulled her hood down and opened the heavy steel door. The light above it flickered and they entered a dimly lit room. Several of the lights had been burnt or were also flickering.

Tears rose in her grey eyes because she was anxious. Cressida showed them where to go and Katniss slid down each ladder. Until they reached a familiar ledge, that's when Katniss knew where to go. Slowly, she approached the edge and was greeted by the smell of rotting flesh. She looked down and saw that the room was obliterated with flesh and blood stains decorating the chunks of rock and metal. She started to hyperventilate when she didn't see Peeta.

Cautiously she got down the ledge and skidded around the deepest hole in the explosion. The part of the ceiling had collapsed on the floor which was now a giant boulder which had to be climbed to see what was on the other end. Without hesitation, Katniss started to climb, not knowing what was going to be on the other side. Quickly and eagerly, she reached the top and pulled herself up.

Katniss went limp when she met his blue gaze.

_You won't see me fall apart_

_Because I've got an _

_Elastic heart._


	24. Chapter 23

**Man, you guys! Your comments for the last 4 chapters were rather… interesting.**

**Anyways, chapter posting may be a little slow, cuz we're getting real big projects in school now. Plus I'm going camping over the long weekend.**

_Her muscles went limp when she met his blue gaze._

"_Peeta."_

Katniss felt herself stop breathing for a second. Peeta started to walk towards her with astonishment on his face. He had more scrapes and cuts on his face now. They looked deeper and more blood was running out of them. The moment her boots made contact with the ground she ran towards him.

Peeta started to walk faster. His heart melted at the sight of her face. A smile tugged mildly at the end of his lips and he felt tears coming.

She ran faster and faster until she felt his arms wrap around her waist. He lifted her off the ground and spun her around. Katniss cried into his shoulder and released more shrieks. "Peeta!"

_Send your dreams_

_Where nobody hides_

_Give your tears_

_To the tide_

"You're alive." Katniss cried. "You're alive!" Her hands trembled and gripped tighter on his armor to get as close to him as possible. Her cries echoed through the tunnels. She pressed her lips against his neck and felt warmth. She kissed him rapidly and repeatedly on his neck.  
"I'm here," He assured her. "Shh. I'm here."

Katniss ran her fingers through his curls and continued kissing the warm skin on his neck. Peeta pressed her head closer to her neck and then he pressed his nose in between the back of her ear and her hairline. He breathed in the scent of sweat and her skin. Slowly, he kissed her jawline and hoisted her up so she was straddling him.

"I thought you were dead!" She kept on repeating.

"I'm okay." He replied. He breathed in her scent again. "So are you." Katniss muffled her noises by keeping her lips close to his skin. After kissing her head several times, he pulled Katniss's face away from his neck. Her face was read and her lips were quivering. Her face was soaked with tears and she was letting out wails. He cupped her face and ran his thumb along her bottom lip.

"You're still so beautiful," He told her. "Even when you're crying."

She laughed and kissed his lips. The warm feeling in her chest spread through her body and made her shudder and it caused her breathing to accelerate. Peeta took over her mouth and let his tongue run along her bottom lip. Instantly, Katniss opened her mouth and they fervently kissed for the first time for what felt like years.

_There's no end_

_There is no goodbye_

_Disappear_

_With the night_

Katniss's body trembled and thoughts ran through her mind.

Peeta was okay.

He was alive.

He was alive and was with her now, comforting her and assuring her.

The sound of his lover crying made tears leak from his eyes. He joined her in making cries.  
"This doesn't feel real…" Katniss cried.

"It is real," Peeta told her. "You're not dreaming." He kissed her between speaking. "It's me."  
It felt like they were alone.

Just the two of them, no one watching. Just the two of them sharing kisses and loving words. Katniss didn't care about what the others thought.

Neither did Peeta. They kissed each other with desire and would pull away from each other's kisses just to release a cry or get a gulp of air. After a few minutes of Katniss muffling her cries between her and Peeta's lips, she embraced him again and wailed. Her tears came again and she then placed her open mouth on Peeta's jaw, just resting it lightly above his pale skin. Peeta put her down so her feet touched the ground. He kissed her head and stroked her hair. When his fingers got to her low ponytail he twirled the hair around his finger. "I love you." He whispered. Katniss closed her lips around the skin on his jaw and kissed him there.

He heard her wail and tremble again. Her hands were in his hair near the nape of his neck. He hushed her and he put his hands on her belly. Katniss didn't feel his hands there though- because of her vest. Peeta felt the rich fabric of the cloak under his fingertips. He moved his hands so they were on her sides. Her breath caught and she pulled away and looked deep into his blue gaze. Her eyes were red and tears were spilling out of them. Peeta smirked in a kind and loving way. His hands cupped her face and she watched him. Her mouth opened slightly as she felt his thumbs slide up towards her grey eyes. Lovingly he wiped away the tears. When he did, her eyelashes clumped together into little spikes. He kissed her again, briefly this time, and Katniss started to cry again.

"I love you, Katniss."

Katniss laid her hands over top of Peeta's, which were still cupping her cheeks. "Me too,"

He touched his forehead to hers and spoke. "You know we're not alone."  
Katniss nodded. "I know." She responded. Slowly Katniss looked at her team, slightly embarrassed.

…

Katniss gave Peeta the dark green cloak she had been carrying. It was the a deep and dark green color, and she thought the hood on his head looked interesting as it contrasted with his bright golden hair. Katniss looked at his hair and suddenly she couldn't fight the urge.

She walked up to him and put his hood down. She started to run her fingers through his locks, gently scratching his scalp. Her fingers smoothed back his hair in the opposite way it was growing, so his hair started to get messy.

"What are you doing, Kitty Kat?" He asked sweetly.

Katniss switched her gaze to look into his eyes. She did this whenever she got a new nickname. She had gotten used to being called 'Kat' by Peeta.

She ignored him and continued playing with his hair. Peeta had to admit: he liked what she was doing. While she was distracted with his hair he leaned in and gently brushed his lips over hers. She stopped messing with his hair and watched his eyes close as he pressed his lips harder against hers and kissed her. She kissed him back and held her thumb and two fingers lightly underneath his chin, as if holding him in place.

Peeta pulled back softly and they looked into each other's eyes. Katniss kept her hand in the same place.

"Let's get going, lovebirds. You can make out with your significant other once Snow is dead." Finnick snorted. Katniss bit her lip and nodded.

"Mm." Peeta said. He nuzzled his nose against hers and his partner again. She laughed softly at the sight of his messy hair and she patted it down.

"Let's go." Katniss whispered. Peeta smiled. He pecked her pointed nose and she gave him a tiny smile. Peeta parted himself from her and gave her a little push on the small of her back.

…

When they were leaving the tunnels, Cressida and the others had the same thought when they saw a huge crowd of Capitol citizens heading somewhere.

"We should split up. There's too many of us dressed the same so they'll get suspicious." She said. True. It was true, everyone's cloaks were the same style, just with different colors.

_Well, you can't split __**us **__up. _Katniss thought. She reached behind her and grasped Peeta's hand. She felt his fingers wrap around her hand.

Cressida turned her blue gaze at the couple. "It'd be good idea for the two of you to go. That is, if you want to stay with Peeta." She directed to Katniss. Katniss nodded and turned to faced Peeta. She put her hand on his chest and nodded, as if asking him if he was okay with it.

He nodded back. "Yup."

"You two are inseparable." Finnick smirked.

Peeta and Katniss stared at each other's eyes for a while. They didn't even hear Finnick.

Peeta was the one who parted the 'love staring' and he looked at the whole team, but didn't make eye contact with Gale, **despite the fact that he had no knowledge that Katniss had been raped. **

"You two lovebirds take care." Finnick hit Peeta in the back. He pinched Katniss's cheek and she moved her head away. Cressida opened the door from the abandoned apartment for them. Peeta held out his hand to Katniss and she quickly took it.

Peeta looked back at everyone and they all nodded their heads.

Katniss looked at him by accident.

He had his now-bloodcurdling eyes glued to her and her eyes filled with fear. She moved closer to Peeta and anxiety took over her. Katniss flinched because she felt soreness grow between her legs suddenly, and his glare was sending chills down her spine. She looked away when her body recoiled.

Finnick saw this and he looked back at Gale discreetly.

That's when he remembered hearing noises at 4 in the morning.

Ones that didn't just belong to Katniss.

And they didn't sound like a noise someone would make from pain.

Finnick's eyes narrowed and he started to think thoughts that had never occurred to him. If it was true, he still felt bad, because he was a friend of Katniss.

He watched and Peeta lead Katniss out the door.

When they left, Finnick turned his attention to Gale.

"Did something happen between you two?"

…

Katniss walked next to Peeta. They both kept their heads down. When bullets pierced the air, Katniss let out a shrill scream and covered her ears. Peeta pulled her down to the ground. He placed a hand over her head and supported her with the other. He covered her boy with part of his torso. It was nothing but screaming and loud noises of bullets.

She held on to one of his arms tightly and shut her eyes. She was confused when Peeta made her stand up.

"Katniss! Go!" He commanded. "I'm right behind you, go!" He pushed her out of the crowd and behind buildings. She obeyed and Peeta ran beside her. When they got behind a violet building they saw Peacekeepers coming around the corner. Peeta was looking back at the crowd of civilians.

"Peeta," She trembled. She pulled him back so he could see the danger. They thought of the same reaction and dropped to their stomachs. Katniss didn't see what was beneath her feet and she ended up lying next to a corpse. She trembled and found it hard to breathe. Peeta kept his hand on her ankle so she wouldn't worry.

Her face was on a puddle of blood belonging to the corpse. She panicked put sealed her eyes shut and covered part of her face with her sleeve as the Peacekeepers approached.

They didn't care about the bodies on the floor and a Peacekeeper stepped right on her head. It was as if Peeta had seen, because his grip on her ankle tightened.

When the group passed towards the crowd of Capitol citizens, Peeta got to his feet and helped Katniss up. His stomach dropped at the sight of blood on her cheek.

"Peeta, it's okay, it's not mine." She pointed at the corpse.

He released a breath and wiped the red fluid off her cheek. Her cheek was left a mix of her skin color and the blood.

Peeta suddenly had the urge to press her against the building's wall and kiss and touch her all over.

But to keep the urge down he clutched her hand and looked down at the contrast of her olive skin and his fair colored skin like he always did.

She pulled him through the passages towards the city circle.

When they arrived, they realized the crowd they were part of had gotten there earlier.

They were trying to get into the mansion but something was blocking their way.

"What are they doing?" Katniss asked. Peeta started to lead again.

"Who knows, but we should take a closer look," They pushed through the crowd and she held on tightly to Peeta's hand. When they got closer, they realized there was a barricade in front of the mansion.

There were children inside. From 4 year olds to 16 year olds. They were huddled in groups and they looked frightened and cold.  
"What are they doing in there?!" She gasped.

"They're like a shield." Peeta told her. "For the President. They're acting like human shields."

Suddenly, the crowd shifted. They started moving and Katniss stayed in place with Peeta.

They watched and were about to leave when they heard a buzzing sound come from above.

A hovercraft was over head of the barricade.

The bottom of the hovercraft opened and silver objects floated down.

_Parachutes._

The parachute got closer and closer until they were in the hands of the children in the barricade. Their fingers trembled as they untied the small strings.

The noise of the crowd was silenced when the parachutes exploded, making screams fill the air. Katniss dropped to the ground when she heard the noise of the explosions. She watched in horror as the children's blood flowed through the cracks on the pavement. Children were left on the ground crying and wailing, many of them trying to crawl to safety by pulling themselves with their hands, since several of them had lost a limb. Some died the moment the bombs went off. When another parachute exploded Katniss flinched and she and Peeta were showered with debris and blood. They shielded each other and pressed their heads against one another. A high pitched noise filled her ears.

When they looked up, another hovercraft arrived and landed on the pavement. Peeta grabbed both of her hands and pulled Katniss up and spoke to her. She could barely make out what he was saying.

"We can't help them!" He cried. "We have to go, come on."

She nodded and looked back at the bloody barricade.

She squinted when she saw rebel nurses rushing towards the bloody scene with kits. One of the nurses stood out due to her small size. Katniss recognized the braided bun in her hair.

She looked at Peeta and her stare scared him. "What is it? What's wrong?!" She started to panic and pulled away from Peeta's grasp.

"P…Puh..." She stuttered. He eyed her. Katniss looked back at the barricade and realized the nurses were getting closer to it. She pulled away from his grasp and cupped his face. She kissed him hard and ran away from him. _No!_  
"KATNISS!" He cried.

He chased after her and pushed pass the last few people who were part of the crowd.

Prim settled on a 6 year old boy and wrapped her gray coat around his shoulders. The child was wailing and had blood all over him. She tried to pull him up.

But the boy dropped dead on the ground.

Katniss kept running, until she heard a noise come from above. She stopped and looked up to see the hovercraft. More parachutes floated down.

"Prim!" She shrieked. Prim was checking vitals on the boy, still not sure if he was dead or alive when she heard her sister.

She looked up and saw Katniss dashing towards her.

"Katniss!" She replied. Prim was confused. What was going? What's happening?

That's when she heard it too.

The hovercraft.

She looked up and saw parachutes.

The air was taken from her lungs and what was about to happen registered in her mind.

Prim stood up quickly and ran towards Katniss. When Katniss saw Prim coming, she slowed down.

That's when the first parachute touched the ground, setting the others that were still in the air to burst.

Katniss was blown back from the impact, sending her flying back onto the concrete.

_Prim._

Her eyes were open and Peeta appeared above her.

For some reason, she could still breathe. He scooped her up in his arms but she rolled off on purpose. "Prim," She whispered. She looked up and her vision was blurry.

She could see even more blood now. Her vision cleared and she saw it.

A small pale blue and grey figure on the cement. She started to run, her head still spinning. She approached the figure and turned it over to face innocent and lifeless blue eyes.

It was her little Primrose.


	25. Chapter 24

**Ch. 24**

That's when Katniss realized

Those eyes

Were not lifeless.

Innocent and blue, but not lifeless.

Prim's eyes were wide with terror and shock. She was breathing rapidly through her mouth. The moment Prim realized she was still alive she squeezed her eyes shut and tears poured out of them. Prim started to produce eerie and ear piercing screaming.

Prim could feel dramatic pain. Her blond hair was stuck to the blood and tears on her face. Her screams sounded exactly like the ones Katniss had heard in the arena. Katniss panicked when she realized Prim was highly disoriented and covered in blood. There were scratches all over her.

"KATNISS! Help me! Help me!" She wailed. "Please!" Her shrieks were louder than ever, and Katniss started to scream as well, because she was shocked.

"Prim! I'm right here, Prim, you're gonna be okay, you're gonna be fine!" Katniss lifted Prim up and Prim kept releasing cries of extreme agony and suffering.  
She continued screaming at the top of her lungs even after Katniss had scooped her up. Prim held on to her sister for dear life.

Prim's noises were identical to the ones Katniss heard in the arena. Screaming and shrieking and pleading. Her pale and bloody fingers clawed at Katniss's coat. She buried her face in Katniss's shoulder to muffle her noises, but continued screaming. That's when Katniss realized that Prim felt different. Not the thrashing and trembling. There was something else. Prim was light.

Too light.

Unsure of what she would find, Katniss searched Prim's body for major wounds and realized most of her blood was coming from the hem of her dress. She raised the hem slightly to check Prim's legs.

Or where her legs once were.

Katniss felt her heart stop at the sight.

Torn flesh that was gushing blood. One of her legs was missing entirely while the other was gone below the knee. Katniss hyperventilated and tears came into her eyes. She started making the strange choking noises she made when she cried and she covered her mouth.

The leg which had been blown off halfway had the bone sticking out and when Katniss saw the white color she felt herself get light headed and dizzy.

She watched in horror as blood dripped onto her cloak and on the snow.

"Katniss!"

_Look around just people, can you hear their voice_

Her head bolted up and she saw Lily and a dark haired nurse running towards them with a stretcher. Peeta was running alongside them. She released a breath and pressed Prim's head closer to her shoulder. "Prim," She said in a shaky voice. "You're going to be okay." She told her.

_Find the one who'll guide you _

Peeta got to them first and recognized Prim's screaming. "Give her to me, Katniss." Peeta but his hands under Prim's arms and attempted to lift her off.

"No! No! Katniss!" She yelped. She was gripped onto Katniss's body like a tick.

"It's me, Prim," Peeta turned her over so she could see his face. When she saw him, she stopped screaming and just whimpered and sniffled. She looked at Peeta and gripped onto him tightly. "Just hold on to me, Prim. Can you do that?"

_To the limits of your choice_

Prim just kept her eyes glued to Peeta's, too scared to say anything.

"You're going to be okay, I promise." Peeta brushed back some burnt hair out of Prim's blood-spattered face.

Katniss wrapped the hem of Prim's dress around the wound that was bleeding the most. With that, the fingers of pain spread through her small and weak body, sending spasms and causing her to shriek.

_But if you're in the eye of storm_

They started to run towards Lily and the other nurse. Peeta ran with Prim in his arms and Katniss kept her hands on Peeta's arm that was supporting Prim's shoulders and everything above.

"Prim! Katniss!" Lily cried.

"Mom!" Katniss exclaimed. When they reached them, Peeta quickly laid Prim down on the stretcher. Lily wiped away some of the blood on Prim's face, and that's when everyone realized how much blood she had lost. Prim was also in shock.

Her lips were blue and she was breathing hard.

"You're going to be fine, Prim. Be strong, okay?" Katniss's vision grew fuzzy on the edges. She was finding it hard to focus.

_Just think of the lonely dove_

Prim nodded slightly. Katniss gave her a kiss on her forehead. But Prim already knew what those forehead kisses meant.

"Katniss, no! Don't leave me, please!" She begged.

"Prim," She said, taking her face in her hands. "I'll be right here, look." Katniss slipped her hand inside her coat and found a cold metal object on the strap of her vest. She took it off and restrained it a strap on Prim's dress. Katniss wanted to say more but forgot what she was going to say. Her head was still spinning and she felt weak herself, too. She watched as Lily and the other nurse spoke to Prim and carried her towards the hovercraft. "Katniss!"

_The experience of survival_

Katniss watched as the hovercraft disappeared and she held onto Peeta. She felt exhausted and pain was coming in from the back of her head.

"Katniss?" He asked, grabbing onto her waist. "Are you hurt?"  
"I can't… I…"  
"What? What is it?"

She stuttered and she grew anxious.

Something was wrong with her. She didn't feel right. She looked down at her feet and saw four of her own, swerving.

_Is the key to gravity of love_

"Peeta," She gasped. She stumbled backwards but Peeta caught her. The moment she fell into his arms, she felt pain between her legs.

_Right. _She thought. _He doesn't know. _He started to go into shock himself too.

What was happening? _What was happening?!_ She was losing consciousness. His little Mockingjay was fainting.

"Peeta…!" She cried, and tried to reach for his face. But she realized she was seeing two of him and she was trying to reach the wrong 'him'. She fell to her knees and Peeta voluntarily did so as well. _What's happening to me?_

"Katniss?! Katniss, please, get up, tell me what's wrong! Katniss!" He begged.

Peeta started to cry. He was scared. "Katniss!" He begged. "Please, Katniss!" He cried. By looking into her eyes, he knew she was clueless too.

That's when everything started to get blurry. Peeta's face was losing form and she could only see a strange blur which she knew was him. _Get up! Get up!_

"No." She whispered. "Don't leave me, please, please just… Peeta, please don't leave me, please, I'm sorry I betrayed you."  
Her eyelids were drooping. "KATNISS!" He screamed. He started shaking her, crying.

"Don't go. I need you to stay with me, Peeta, I need, I need…" Tears streamed down her face.

"Katniss, I'm not going anywhere, I'm staying right here, please get up! Wake up, please!"

It was as if her nightmare she had had in Tigris's basement was coming true. She was fainting and Peeta was begging and imploring for her to stand up.

"Stay with me."

"Always!" He replied. His tears fell onto her face. "Always. I'm… I'll always stay with you."

"Stay with me, Peeta." Katniss kept repeating. Saying them made her happy. Saying his name made her happy now. _Peeta. Please stay with me._

She still didn't knew what was occurring. But she knew she couldn't wake up from this hazy world she was currently in.

"No, Katniss! No! Get up!" He pled. _What's happening to you? _

Peeta thought back to everything.

Why was she fainting? What had happened? Was she in extreme shock from Prim's accident?

"Please, Peeta." She said a bit louder. She muscles went limp until he was cradling her in his arms.

Peeta brought her face up to his, and pressed their noses and foreheads together. Her eyes were closed but she was still conscious. Then they opened to get a view of Peeta. Their eyes met and Katniss could see a bit clearer. She touched his lips lightly with her fingertips.

"Do you love me?"

_What?  
_"Of course I do. Why would you ask that? Katniss, I love you more than anything in this world."  
"You do?"  
"Yes! Why are you…"  
"You love me?" She asked. She sounded like she had no idea, like she couldn't believe it.

"I love you." He replied.

"You love me."  
"Katniss?"

She didn't say anything. Instead, she looked behind Peeta.

Her vision grew dark and clouded until her eyes didn't allow her to see anymore.

Her head fell backwards and Peeta realized what had happened.

_Waiting in a car_

_Waiting for a ride in the dark_

…

**I'll post the next chapter faster if you don't forget to leave a review **


	26. Chapter 25

**Hello! New chapter, yes yes. I hope you guys are having a nice day.**

**I don't feel like saying anything else.**

**Alright.**

_Waiting in a car_

_Waiting for a ride in the dark_

Katniss felt waves of numbness spread through her body like waves. As she came to her senses, she heard beeping and felt the clasp on her index finger, which was measuring the oxygen levels in her blood. There was an ache at the back of her head. The air she was breathing felt like it was coming in too easily. For a test, she moved her lip and felt the rub of oxygen tubes.

Slowly, the numbness passed and it was replaced by a tingling sensation through her body.

Her fingers moved slightly and felt cloth underneath her.

She was lying on a bed with soft and warm blankets.

_Hospital. _She thought. _I failed the mission and I'm going to have to start all over again._

Katniss guessed she was in 13 again. How she hated the place.

Suddenly, she grew frightened and anxious and her eyes shot open, revealing her grey irises which were surrounded by red sclera. The ceiling was white and high and she knew she wasn't in 13. She had no idea where she was. She had laboured breathing and started to thrash on the bed.

Her hands pulled at the oxygen tubes but they were taped onto her cheeks. Screaming filled the room and Peeta, who had been sitting next to the bed for several hours, immediately took action.

"No, Katniss!" He told her. "Stop, stop, stop." He pulled her hands away from the tubes. "Let go, it's okay." At the sight of his blue eyes, her fingers let go. Her red eyes scared him slightly and Katniss grabbed onto his arms, gripping the sleeves of his dark grey hoodie tightly. She panted and kept her eyes glued to his. She wheezed and let Peeta lay her back down slowly. "There you go. You're okay."  
She tried to speak to him but her words came out as whispers. "Shh," He hushed her with his words and pressed a finger to her lips. He brushed the sweaty strands of hair that were stuck to her forehead back. Katniss let go of Peeta and kept her arms suspended in the air like a newborn. He smiled at her.

Because he knew she was okay, that she was going to be okay despite what she felt. Plus, she looked lovable when she was clueless and silent. He sat down by her side on the white hospital bed.

"How are you feeling, my Mockingjay?"

She opened her mouth but just blinked and looked at him. But didn't know what to say. The words didn't come to her.

"Hm?" He petted her head. Her grey eyes wandered behind his head again. After he realized she wouldn't say anything, he started speaking.

"What's your name?" He asked. Katniss looked at his blue gaze again.

"Kat… Kat…" She murmured.  
"'Kat'? You almost have it. What's your full name?"

"Everdeen."

"Kat Everdeen?" He asked sweetly.  
"Peeta,"

"Mm hm?"  
"You're Peeta." She said. He nodded.

"Yup. That's my name. Now, what's yours? I said it to you earlier. Do you remember?"  
Her eyes wandered again. "N… ness." She stuttered.

Her strange speech was starting to worry him. "Niss." He corrected her.

"Niss." She repeated. She was like a toddler, learning how to speak. "Niss. Kat…" She thought for a second. "Niss."

Peeta smiled and nodded.

"Katniss," She finally said. "Everdeen. Katniss Everdeen."  
"There you go."

That's when Peeta saw something.

Something in her eyes. Something changed.

Katniss reached up to caress his face.

"It's really you." She whispered. "Peeta."

He chuckled and put his hand over hers.

"Tell me, Katniss. What do you remember?"  
"Don't talk to me like I'm wounded." She snapped.

_But you are, sweetheart. You're basically ill._

"Alright, then. Do you know what happened?"  
"I fainted, I think. My head hurts." He ran his thumb along her eyebrows.

"You got a head injury," Peeta said. "Two, actually."  
"Two? How?"

"Apparently you got a mild concussion. Then you hit your head again which resulted in a… rather… mild… major concussion. But you're going to be fine. You've been asleep for two days and so far everything looks fine, according to the doctors."

"Two days? What happened during that?"  
"I was in treatment. Believe it or not, they had to take me to emergency."

"Why?" She asked, rather irritated.

"I was in shock. After you fainted… I… It scared me. I thought you were dying."

"…Peeta," She said in a sad and concerned voice. "It was all okay… You didn't have to worry."

Peeta kissed her forehead. "I'm just glad you're okay."  
"Wait… where are we?"

"Capitol. In a hospital." Her head lifted like a nod. She observed his face.

"Why are you so pale?" She took his face in her hands. "What happened to your cuts and your wounds? They couldn't have healed in 2 days."

"It's the Capitol." Peeta shrugged. "They work their magic, you know?" Katniss brushed his lips with her thumb.

"You look so pale, Peeta." Peeta smirked. He thought she looked cute when she was clueless. He leaned in and kissed her forehead.  
"Did you lose a lot of…?" Her words died away and her brow furrowed.

"What? Blood?"  
Her worried grey eyes looked up at his calm blue ones. "Prim," She whispered.

"She's okay."  
"She's not dead?" Katniss asked, amazed. "Prim's okay?!"

"Yeah. The doctors fixed her up, but… obviously they couldn't save her legs."

Katniss nodded and let silent tears fall. "At least she's okay." Peeta wiped away the tears.

"She lost some blood though."

Katniss didn't say anything.

"But she's fine. She's in a stable condition."

Katniss exhaled and closed her eyes. "Oh, thank God." She sighed. "So she's just low on blood or whatever?"  
"Actually… no, she's perfectly well. They had to find a donor. Your mother was the first option but she has a different blood type."  
"What about me? They could've taken some of mine."  
"Oh, no, Katniss. They couldn't take yours. You were in a coma. It could be hazardous for your health. Plus I didn't let the ones who suggested it. I knew they couldn't do that to you, because of the condition you were in. Besides, you have the same blood type as your mother, while Prim has the same as your dad did; according to your mother."

"Then who did they get? Does she have some random Capitol creep's blood mixing with hers in her veins?"

Peeta chuckled. "Well, he's not much of a creep… at least, I don't think. He's pretty good looking. And he's not from the Capitol, actually." He kept smiling and put his hands over Katniss's stomach.

"Wait a minute." Katniss stopped him and groaned. "Please don't tell me Gale gave—"  
"Ugh, no way." He said with a laugh and rolled his eyes. "It wasn't Gale, he isn't even around. Plus,if anyone's a creep, it's him." When he called Gale a creep, a thought ran through Katniss's mind.

_Well, he's more of a creep in my mind than in yours. _  
He managed to get a laugh from her and it made him happy to see her laugh.

"I thought it would be weird if Prim didn't know her donor. So I suggested that my blood could do the trick,"

Katniss eyes grew as wide as owl's.

"You were Prim's donor." She gasped.

"Yeah." Peeta smiled.

Katniss sat up from her bed, ignoring her headache. She stared at him, surprised.

What were the chances of Prim and Peeta being the same blood type? "Thank you," She said in a whisper.

Her grey eyes started to glisten and Peeta knew the tears were coming. He embraced her and she rested her cheek on his shoulder. "Thank you, Peeta, thank you…" She said, gasping because she had started to cry softly. He rubbed her back.

"You're welcome."  
"You saved her. You saved Prim," She whimpered.

"Mm hm." Peeta kissed her temple. He ran his fingers along her white hospital gown, which was surprisingly thick and fleecy for clothes you'd find on a hospital patient. Katniss pulled her head away but kept her arms around him. She looked up at him and he looked down at her face. Her grey eyes looked tired. He still thought she looked cute this way. The way she sat in front of Peeta made her look like a baby in the body of a 17 year old grabbing onto its parent's chest. Peeta put his arms right above her waist and hoisted her up so his face was closer to hers. He touched his nose to Katniss's. A small smile crept onto her face and she started to nuzzle her nose against his. Peeta smiled back.

He wanted to kiss her lips. But for some reason that he couldn't quite form, he believed that he wasn't supposed to.

The concussions had changed her. But Peeta knew that over time her strange memory and actions would stop being the way they currently were, that she wouldn't be like this forever.

"Do you remember what occurred a few weeks before we left 13?"

Her brow furrowed and she looked away. "Um…"  
"How could you forget? It was a big obstacle for us. Despite how small 'it' is." A few seconds passed until her brow straitened itself out.

Her mouth opened slightly. "Ooh." She sighed.

Gently she lowered her head to Peeta's chest and snuggled closer to his body. She put her hands on his chest and smiled softly when she heard his soothing heartbeat. "We made a baby, before leaving on the mission," She recalled. "By accident."

"Mm hm. You're going to be a mother."

She nodded. "Yeah."

Katniss was scared and felt like she was going to be a horrible mother. She was scared of giving birth to it mainly. She couldn't imagine what it would feel like. "Is it okay?"

He shrugged. "I hope it is."

Katniss tilted her head in question. "You don't know? But we're in a hospital."  
"I couldn't tell them. This war isn't over until Snow dies. We still need to keep it a secret. If I told one of the nurses they'd probably pass it on. You know how people are here in the Capitol."

"But… we have to know how it's doing. How are we going to know if we can't tell the doctors?"  
"Because we're going home in a few days. We'll find out there."  
"We don't have a home. It's gone, remember?"

"Well guess what?" He said he said in a whisper.

"What?" She whispered back.

"They're reconstructing it. The refugees are going back to clean it all up. There were a lot of people from other districts who volunteered to help, too."

"How long will we have to wait, then?"

"About 5 days. Not too long. So don't worry. It's all going to be okay."

She nodded. Katniss was happy to know she was going home, despite 12 was going to be different.

"Have any names came to you yet?"  
"Um… Not in particular. I like the name 'Saffron' though."

"What does Saffron mean?"  
"It's a spice. And a shade of red. No… no not red. Yellow, I think. It's the name of a shade of yellow and the flower is purple. But the spice is red."

"Sounds pretty. And if it's a boy?"  
"That I do not know."

"Not any kind of tree you know? Or plant?"

"Oh, there's tons. It's just that not many of them appeal to me… Alder, Bracken, Ash… There's more. But I don't want to name our son after plants or trees for some reason."

Peeta opened his mouth but she added something.

"Or bread."  
This quickly brought a laugh to Peeta. Katniss smiled and ran her fingers through his blonde, puffy hair.

"That hurt."

"What?"  
"That comment."

"Oh. Sorry. I just…"  
"Nah, its okay, I understand. My dad was the one who had that 'name the boys after bread' idea and for some reason my mom agreed."

"Oh." She said in a high pitched voice. She then snorted.

"I wonder what my sister's name would have been."  
"Sister?"  
"I just wonder if I had ever had one."

"Oh."

"My dad would want to name her 'Muffin' or something."

"That sounds like a name you'd give a cat or a dog."

Peeta shrugged.

Katniss bit her lip. "…Pansy cake."

Both of them snorted and burst out laughing. Peeta held her close to him and continued laughing. "Pansy cake." He whispered.

Several minutes after they finished, Katniss found herself lying next to Peeta on the hospital bed. He had fallen asleep and she was running her fingers through his soft curls. She was wrapped in his strong and warm arms. Her body was pressed up against his. Peeta had fallen almost an hour ago.

Katniss brought her face closer and planted a kiss on his lips in a way that wasn't passionate nor soft. She let her tongue slide along his bottom lip slightly. When she parted their lips, she kissed his nose. She was going to miss moments like this.

Because she knew that's someday she'd have to tell him about her and Gale.


	27. Chapter 26

**Thank you for your reviews, guys! I don't own THG.**

Lily came to visit Katniss. But Katniss was fast asleep at the time, so Lily just caressed her face and gave her daughter soft kisses on her head.

Lily spoke with Peeta a bit and he felt awkward, knowing he was speaking with his pregnant lover's mother when he had never had a good conversation with her previously. Their conversation was mostly about Lily's daughters. Peeta told Lily how Katniss was doing and Lily gave him updates about Prim, saying that she was knocked out with morphling, while on the other hand, Katniss had fallen asleep with only a tiny dosage of the drug. It was probably a symptom of her concussion that she was sleeping so easily.

Before Katniss's mother left, she quietly said thank you to Peeta, for keeping Katniss safe and for helping save Prim. Then she gave him a hug.

Katniss had dreams where she would be hunting with him, but in her dream she was still scared. At the end of every dream, Gale would somehow end up on her and Katniss would start to scream, but she couldn't hear herself screaming. She would scream for Peeta and beg Gale not to hurt her.

Today in particular, her fear came to life, but in a different way.

She woke with weight on her chest.

It was Peeta, and he had fallen asleep with his head on that spot. Katniss instantly grew uneasy and uncomfortable. Whimpers escaped her mouth as Katniss grabbed onto the corners of the bed, and tried to pull herself from under Peeta's body.

The way their bodies lied along each other made her feel anxious and fearful. She was able to lift his head off her chest and set it gently onto the soft pillow. When she managed to get out from under him, Katniss sat up and stared at Peeta timidly and ashamedly.

Her hands cupped over her mouth and she hugged her knees. She cried and sniffled. Flashbacks of her and Gale in the basement saturated her mind and she shivered.

She wanted to wake Peeta up, right now, and tell him everything. She wanted to be honest and tell him she was the one who started it all. That yes, she was the one who first wanted to get intimate, and the one who was pressuring the other.

But Katniss was frightened.

What would Peeta do?

She didn't know.

She knew Peeta was always kind and gentle… especially to her, since she was his lover. Plus, she was carrying his baby. But Peeta would never guess what happened that night. Peeta would had never imagined another man on Katniss, while she was pregnant with her lover's baby. It would be an enormous and shocking surprise for Peeta. He could get infuriated at both Katniss and Gale. But also he could be hit hard by misery and grief to acknowledge the fact that Katniss was hurt in a way that messed her up more than she was days prior.

Katniss rubbed her abdomen and poked her hipbones, which were still sore from her bulletproof vest and from Gale.

Gale had made the pain on her hipbones worse since he had literally dug his fingernails into Katniss's skin. They had even left small marks that were a mix of red and purple.

"Please be okay." She whispered, as she rubbed her abdomen.

When Katniss was told she was pregnant, she didn't know how she felt about the baby; whether she loved it or not.

Not until Coin gave her the abortion pills, Katniss realized that she couldn't kill the baby and that she'd already grown attached to it. It hadn't even taken its first gulp of air. Heck, Katniss hadn't even met it yet and she already cared for it- same way she cared for Prim. It was the same as killing someone in the arena, only that in this case, it was worse. Because it was her child; her flesh and blood combined with Peeta's.

She felt a hand touch her foot.

"Katniss?" Peeta lifted his head from the pillow and reached up to stroke her tear-stained face. "A nightmare?"

Katniss nodded, despite it wasn't fully true. His eyes looked swollen from sleep.

"Let me hold you." He suggested.

Without hesitation, Katniss lied back down next to Peeta and he kissed her temple. She shuddered when Peeta put a leg over her hip. _It can't go any further._ Katniss hoped. This was as far as they were going.

When Peeta kissed and nipped at the pink scar on her collarbone- the one he liked a lot for some reason- Katniss hissed. Hearing her, Peeta quickly pulled his lips away from her collarbone and faced her. "Did that hurt?" He was worried.

"No. I just… don't…" _How should I say this? _"I don't like it when you…"

"Oh. Sorry. When did that become annoying?"

"Umm….a month ago, I think."

Katniss scowled and Peeta smiled. He brushed back strands of hair and brought his lips closer to hers.

"Want to talk about it? Your nightmare, I mean?"  
Katniss felt a twinge in her stomach and her ears grew hot. "No."

"Are you sure?"

Katniss nodded.

"Your mother stopped by."

"Did she?" Katniss yawned.

Peeta nodded. "She told me Prim is knocked out with morphling." He snorted. Katniss's lips curved into a small smile. "Also, she's getting prosthetics."  
"Mm hm." Katniss started to fidget with the tape that kept a needle - that gave her vitamins - in place.

Then she snuggled her head against his chest and closed her eyes. Peeta looked down at her. She looked sick. Terribly, even though she wasn't. The oxygen tubes made it look like she was sick. Same with her hospital bracelet, somehow. Katniss looked up and Peeta realized the redness in her eyes had gone down. He lifted her chin and Katniss closed her eyes. Peeta opened his mouth and kissed her softly.

Katniss made a strange, quiet moan at the back of her throat. Peeta opened his mouth a little to capture her lips into his mouth. Katniss felt a tickling sensation in her abdomen when she felt his tongue cream the bottom of her top lip.

After their lips parted, their eyes met. Peeta observed the little stripes and strange patterns in her grey eyes and she observed his features.

Katniss gave a jump when the door opened. It was Lily, and she was accompanied by a brown haired nurse. Katniss moved so that Peeta could stand up.

"Hello Ms. Everdeen," The nurse said. "And Mr. Mellark." She walked over to the large windows, which were shrouded by blue-grey curtains. She opened the curtains and light flooded the room. Katniss's eyes stung and she covered them with her arm.

"Oh. It's not too bright, is it?" The nurse asked, concerned.

"No… it's…. its fine, its okay."

The nurse nodded and attended to Katniss's monitors. Lily approached Katniss's bed and she embraced her. Katniss wrapped an arm around Lily's neck and the other under Lily's arm. Katniss closed her eyes and she felt Lily kiss the beck of her head. Peeta watched as the nurse was checking Katniss's records and then he turned around to see Katniss hugging her mother.

"You can see Prim now." Lily said. "It would be better if you went to her room though."

_Obviously. _Katniss thought.

…

The nurse brought Katniss a long sleeved pale beige nightgown that dropped right below her knees.

Peeta voluntarily left the room but Katniss held onto his wrist. At the same time, she wanted him to go. She wanted him to stay so she could feel safe. But after what Gale did to her, she had developed a new fear.

Weeks ago, Katniss would change clothes or undress in front of Peeta with no problem. She had gotten used to being naked in front of him after their second night of intimacy. Actually, she never undressed in front of him directly unless they both felt it, that strange feeling in their stomachs that made them yearn for each other's bodies. Katniss would see it in Peeta's eyes. He was easily turned on by her.

But there were those days, for example, the day they were leaving on their mission, where Peeta would help her dress.

She wanted everyone to go. She could change out of her clothes with no help.

It took a while of Katniss begging and pleading her mother and the nurse to leave and let her do this on her own. After 10 minutes, Katniss started to let tears stream down her face.

They refused to leave, though. They had to supervise her.

"Fine!" She cried. "But keep your hands off me. I can do this on my own. Turn your backs at least."

It took 15 minutes.

Peeta grew worried, despite he knew Lily was there for her.

When the door opened, Peeta stood up from the chair outside of the room. Katniss was being helped by the nurse to walk to Prim's room. He noticed she didn't walk as well as she used to. Her brow was furrowed and she looked angry. The dark, wavy locks on her head were pulled back into a low ponytail.

When her eyes met Peeta's, she yanked her arm away from the nurse's grip, giving her a face, and walked towards her partner and linked arms with him.

"Don't be like that. She's just trying to help."

"Shut up. You know I don't like these people." She hissed silently.

"Well, not all of them are bad—"

He was cut off by her icy glare. Peeta turned his eyes away and sighed. "Alright."

To get to Prim's room, they had to go down a few elevators until they entered a different zone of the hospital that was full of kids and their parents. They all stared at Katniss and Peeta in awe. They were shocked and a bit scared, knowing they were rebels. Katniss ignored them and kept her head down. When they reached Prim's room, Lily opened the door and Peeta led Katniss in.

The hospital room had small, pastel blue and green patterns on the light, tan- colored walls. The ceiling had pale green stars on it of different sizes. Katniss suspected they glowed in the dark.

Prim's eyes opened when she heard the door opened and she turned her head to see her sister, her mother, the nurse, and her former to-be-brother-in-law, or basically, her sister's partner.

Katniss slipped her arm away from Peeta's and approached her little sister. The explosion had burnt off the hair near her face, so now Prim had bangs just covering her eyebrows. Katniss and Prim smiled at each other and Peeta brought a chair to Katniss so she could sit. Katniss held Prim's hand.

"Hey, little duck." Katniss beamed.

"Hi." Prim replied sweetly. Katniss's smiled dropped little by little until she looked down at where Prim's legs were.

Her left leg had been amputated 5 inches above the knee and her right leg was amputated at 3 inches below it. Katniss faced her sister again and Prim saw some tears.

"At least _you're_ okay." Katniss brushed the blonde bangs out of the way and then embraced Prim. "Because I'm not." Prim still didn't know much about what had happened to her older sister.

Peeta watched as Lily came closer to them and joined their hug. His eyes displayed gloom.

Knowing Katniss had a loving, and close family while his never was. Katniss was all he had left. She was his family. And soon, maybe, she would have their baby. Then their family would be completed.

But he still knew that Katniss had another family, which she loved just as much.

…

Katniss spent the rest of the day with Prim.

So Peeta just sort of sat there, listening, for several hours.

Katniss started to get tired at 6 P.M and Peeta took her back, but not before Prim asked him for a hug as a thank you.

In the elevator, Katniss was leaning on his side. "I'm so tired, Peeta." She silently groaned.

"Here." Peeta scooped her up into his arms and Katniss felt scared again. Peeta could feel her tense muscles.

Once they got to Katniss's hospital room, Peeta laid her down and then he left for a quick minute to change his clothes. Katniss's nurse came in and hooked her up to the machines.

"I'm sorry." Katniss blurted. "About being… rude earlier."

The nurse looked up, her brown and blonde highlighted curls bouncing. "Oh, it's alright, Katniss. You've been through a lot, so it's perfectly fine, honey. You get some rest now, okay?"

When Peeta came back, the nurse had already left. Katniss looked confused.

He nestled into bed with her.

"…I think she gave me morphling." Katniss spoke with a stuttered and drunk-sounding voice.

"Oh… do you want it?"  
"…No."

Peeta disconnected her from the drip. "There we go. All good?"  
"Yeah."

Peeta laid back down and held out his arms. Katniss slowly laid her head down on his chest. She kept everything her hips down away from Peeta's body. She only kept her torso and her head and arms on him.

Before, she would lay on him full on- well, actually, that was only after they had just had intercourse- but on normal nights, she would rest her pelvis on his hipbone or press it against it and wrap her legs around his.

Peeta's touch trailed strange, tickling sensations. His hands were on her ribcage and they slowly made their way down. They went over her hips, and slipped under the nightgown to her thighs. Katniss was already feeling anxiety. Peeta's hands went sideways.

So now his hands were on the inside of her thighs and Katniss's heart monitor started to beep rapidly. Peeta looked down at Katniss and could feel her trembling and her muscles were tense. Her eyes were wide open and glued to the wall. Peeta took his hands out from under her nightgown and held Katniss.

The monitor continued to beep rapidly, and then the pattern changed to go even faster. Katniss trembled harder and had laboured breathing now. Peeta made her sit up slightly.

"Katniss?" She didn't respond and kept her gaze down. "Calm down, its okay. Shh." Peeta spoke to her in a worried voice. He was growing uneasy too. Her hard breathing turned into whimpers and little cries coming from the back of her throat.

"You're safe, its okay, just calm down. Breath slowly, Katniss." Katniss slowed down her breathing and after a 10 seconds the monitor's beeping decelerated to Katniss's regular heartbeat.

Peeta pressed his hand to the sides of her jaw and neck. "What happened?" He asked her.

Katniss opened her mouth but no words came out. In her eyes, Peeta could see fear and worry.

"Do you…" Peeta started. "Do you not want me to… touch you…there?"

Katniss looked at him and moved her head sideways, very slightly. Then she nodded.

"Okay." Peeta said calmly. "But tell me next time, okay?"

She nodded in pact.

"Don't keep it hidden. It's better to tell me, for your own good. And mine. I don't want you getting so anxious. It's not good for you, Katniss."

His words echoed in her head. She had to tell him. But how?

Concealing the secret was eating her alive. It was becoming obvious -more and more every day- that something was wrong. She hid her body from his eyes not only because she was scared to have intercourse, but because there were bruises and marks all over her. Mostly on her breasts and her hips, and between her legs. If Peeta saw them he'd grow extremely suspicious and worried. Why were there only bruises on places only he had been?

Sadly, Peeta was no longer the only one who had been there. And he didn't know that.

Katniss had found blood on the floor after Gale raped her. When she wriggled out of his grasp and was putting clothes back on, she felt a substance between her legs, and she could smell the sour, metallic scent of blood. But she paid no attention to it. She was far too messed up to care about anything at the time. She had also been through far too much.

Starvation. Two arenas. A war. And rape.

But now that she thought about how she bled when Gale raped her, she wondered what really happened. He internally wounded her. Or maybe, the baby was gone.

"So from now on… I want you to tell me if something's bothering you. Okay?"

Katniss just gave him a worried stare.

"Yeah? Can you do that for me? A promise?"

Peeta heard Katniss's monitor accelerate for second and then it returned to the normal beeping. Katniss nodded somewhat. She didn't want to worry him, so she accepted the promise. She was trying to keep the secret hidden, but she knew that someday, any day, it would slip.

**Am I the only one who thinks the District 13 chant (the WHO HAA WHO HAA WHO HA one) sounds like something you'd hear at a frat party?**

**Anyways, don't forget to leave a review!**


	28. Chapter 27

**Surprise!**

**A day later you all get a new chapter!**

**In case some of you didn't notice, in the last chapter something bad was hinted about the baby. This is going to be a short chapter BTW**

**I see many of you are waiting for **_**something**_** to happen in my fanfiction…**

**It would be shame if I stopped posting. **

_Their words mostly noises_

_Ghosts with just voices_

_Your words in my memory_

_Are like music to me_

The following morning, Katniss was released from the hospital. Prim had to stay for about one more week, so Lily stayed with her too.

Katniss and Peeta were sent to the president's mansion. Like she suspected, they gave her and Peeta room. It wasn't a hospital, so no one would interrupt them.

Which scared Katniss. She and Peeta would be alone. _At last, _Peeta would think.

When they were given their room, Katniss sat down on the bed and felt the soft bed covers under hands.

She kept her gaze down and her wet hair acted as a curtain to her face. Peeta was looking out the window.

When they were told they could leave the hospital, Peeta expected Katniss to be happy. Instead, she got nervous for a reason he didn't know.

It was about 7:00 P.M.

Peeta was watching people in the city square. It made him sad, because what he was seeing were people cleaning up the area that had been covered with gore. It was mainly just blood stains everywhere, and a few body remains. The snow had been brushed away to clean the pavement. The dead children's bodies that were once there were gone. They probably were the first things taken. He couldn't imagine how depressed Katniss would be if Prim had been killed in the bombs. Katniss was already depressed because of the war he suspected. But if Prim's life had been taken, Katniss would be gone from him.

It was quiet. It was already getting dark out, so the room was lighted dimly with a blue hue. Peeta turned around and saw Katniss sitting on the bed.

He approached her and stroked her wet hair. She had taken a shower an hour ago.

Peeta wanted to join her but Katniss never said anything to him and just closed the door without a word.

Peeta sat down behind Katniss on the bed and wrapped his arms around her stomach. Her arms were on her sides, so he captured her arms with his, too. He rested his chin on her shoulder and poked her neck with his nose. Katniss tilted her head the opposite side.

Katniss was trying hard to show affection to Peeta, which she did feel for him. She was just finding it hard for herself to do it, since her self-esteem had dropped after she was raped. She didn't feel beautiful anymore, despite she knew Peeta thought the complete opposite about her. After a month or so of Peeta telling her how beautiful she was, she started to believe and listen to him. But after what had happened she didn't believe it anymore.

Gale literally left his mark on her.

It was as if he was marking her as his, as if she was his property when she technically wasn't.

Peeta kissed her cheek. "You okay, Kitty Kat?"

Katniss didn't react to the nickname. No words came out of her mouth. She didn't even nod, or shake her head.

"Katniss?" Peeta pressed his lips onto her shoulder. "Everything okay?"

Again, Katniss didn't respond. Peeta pulled her towards him, making her turn around, so she sat in front of him. She accommodated herself so she sat criss-crossed in front of him. Peeta took her hands in his and ran his thumb over the top of her hand. She still kept her gaze down.

"What's happening to you, Katniss?"

She was starting to become annoying, since she wasn't speaking or looking up.

"Look at me." Peeta told her. Katniss stood still. Peeta moved his head lower so he could see her. Katniss moved her head away and closed her eyes, and furrowed her brow. "Katniss," He grunted. He tilted her chin up but she pulled away. "Katniss, I'm sick of this, okay?"

"Sick of what?" She replied, irritated. She finally met his gaze. The redness had gone down in her eyes.

"Sick of the way you're acting. You don't need to be so miserable. Prim's alive, your mother's alive and I'm here with you. This war is over. No more killing. What more do you want, Katniss?"

"Nothing. I just want to be left alone, okay? Just stop arguing with me."

"Then stop acting this way, please! I hate seeing you so… so… depressed and detached, and… I want to see you happy again. I've tried to make you happy, but you aren't budging. There are so many reasons why you should be happy. Your family is alive, the war is over, and we're going home…"  
Katniss sighed and listened.

"Why are you acting this way? Is something bothering you?"

"No," she lied.

"Then why are you—"

"It's a lot of things, Peeta. My mind is messed up from the games and the war I can't…"

Peeta shook his head. "That's a lie." Peeta whispered. "You're not good at keeping secrets. I can tell when you're lying. And I know something is bothering you."

"Nothing's bothering me, Peeta."

"Katniss—"

"I said nothing is bothering me!" She yelled. Katniss got up from the bed and Peeta caught her wrist.

"Why are you lying to me?"

"I'm not lying!"

"Goddamnit, Katniss! I want to help you! I know something is wrong, and it's made you change. Why won't you let me help you?"  
"Because nothing's wrong. I'm just fucked up!" Katniss's expression changed and now she looked like she was about to cry.

"Katniss!" Peeta yelped. He sounded like he was going to cry, too. He was frustrated with her. "Quit lying to me! Stop it, just stop it! I want to help you!" Over his words, Katniss let tears stream down her face.

"Why?!"

"I love you, Katniss. I love you and care about you. You know that. I know something is wrong and I want to help you. Why won't you tell me?"

"Because nothing's wrong! Nothing is wrong!" She sobbed.

Peeta pulled her into his arms. "Nothing is wrong!" she cried not his chest. Peeta buried his lips in her hair.

"I know something is."

Katniss looked up at him. "No, Peeta, I'm not lying, I'm not…" she whimpered.

"I know that somewhere in there, you want to tell me. You just won't let it out. You made me a promise, remember?"

Katniss just stared at him crying. Her lip trembled and opened, trying to find words.

Slowly, she separated herself from Peeta and walked towards the bedroom door. She opened the door and fled from the room. He let her go and didn't go after her.

…

Katniss found a closet in an unoccupied bedroom and hid inside. There were fur coats hanging inside and on the floor of the closet. Katniss curled up on the floor and covered herself with the coats.

She cried silently. Why did it have to be so hard to tell him? Why couldn't she do it?

…

Meanwhile, Peeta was lying on their bed. He thought about what could have happened to Katniss. But he couldn't think of anything.

Hours passed until the winter sun outside was gone. It was dark in the room and Peeta changed into fleecy sweats and a plain shirt. He wondered where Katniss was. He got onto bed and closed his eyes.

When he was nearly asleep, he heard the bedroom door open. Quiet footsteps strolled around the room and Peeta heard the closet door open. Then he heard it click closed and the footsteps wandered over to the bathroom. The door shut.

There were sounds of running water and clattering noises, and clothes falling to the floor. When the bathroom door opened, it was quiet.

Only the soft sound of the clock ticking existed at the moment.

After three seconds the footsteps started again and something was thrown at the floor. Clothes.

Then Peeta felt the bed covers lift and the sound of the thick blankets moving started.

Katniss nestled into bed with him and stared up at the ceiling. Peeta's back was facing her.

"I know you're awake." Katniss muttered.

"Barely." Peeta groaned.

"I'm going to sleep."

"Wait."

Peeta moved to face her and he cupped her face. He planted a kiss on her lips. Katniss parted her lips to let his tongue lightly stroke the roof of her mouth.

When he pulled away, Peeta brushed her hair back. "Goodnight."

_After I have traveled so far,_

_We'd set the fire to the third bar._

_We'd share each other like an island_

_Until exhausted close our eyelids._

_And dreaming pick up from_

_The last place we left off_

_Your soft skin is weeping_

_A joy you can't keep in._


	29. Chapter 28

**Yeah so my stupid laptop has auto correct so excuse the laptop if instead of Katniss, it says Mathias. Etcetera, etcetera. **

**Anyways, sorry for the long wait, I know lots of you are used to getting at least 2/3 chapters per week. I hope some of you understand, because it's almost summer and it's usually the craziest time of the school year. I was just really busy this week with a project and I really wanted to upload yesterday… But I went to go see Imagine Dragons. So that was really fun. **

**And I bet you all heard that filming is officially over for the series… :'(**

**BUUuT …. WE'RE GETTING A MOCKINGJAY PART 2 TEASER ON TUESDAY APARENTLY (FOR THOSE WHO DON'T KNOW YET)!**

_Tough girl_

_I'm in pain_

_It's lonely at the top_

_Blackouts and airplanes_

Katniss moved in her sleep so a ray of sunlight fell directly on one of her eyes. She woke up and moved so the sun wasn't burning her eyes.

This wasn't okay, though.

Waking up wasn't okay.

The guilt ate her up more and more. It hurt more and more every day.

But today in particular, it felt dreadful. Because Peeta knew. And she didn't tell him. They had a fight. Probably the first one they had together – just themselves.

She turned so she could see Peeta.

Just to find he wasn't there.

_I wake up, I wake up_

_I wake up alone._

Katniss was alone. Peeta had probably left because he was feeling disappointed and wounded. It felt like their relationship was starting to fall apart.

But then Katniss remembered what Peeta gave her last night.

He gave her a kiss. A brief and soft one, but it was a kiss.

To show that he still loves her. No matter what.

_No matter what. _Katniss thought. _No matter what._

She sat up and ruffled her messy hair.

She felt tired and guilty.

He probably was walking around the huge mansion, finding some interesting things.

Katniss got out of the bed and got clothes from the closet and stripped herself of her nightgown and her underwear.

She let the garments fall the floor and she walked into the bathroom and locked the door. Carefully, she stepped into the glass-walled shower and selected a setting that was free of soaps and fragrances. Katniss stood in the hot spray and closed her eyes.

Her muscles relaxed and she embraced herself, so her arms were crossed like an 'X' across her chest, and each hand held onto the opposite shoulder. Her tears joined the flow of water.

Once the glass was fogged up completely, Katniss drew small shapes and flowers. When she filled the whole glass with the patterns she shut off the water and stepped out of the shower. She wrapped herself in a soft, white towel and dried herself off.

_I still pour you a glass of champagne_

_I'm a tough girl, _

_Whose soul aches_

Instead of brushing her hair, she ran her hand along the wet, black locks a scarce amount of times. When she brought her hand up to her face, there was a huge knot of hair tangled on her fingers. She had not been eating a lot of meat lately.

She threw the hair in the garbage and changed into a thick sweater and pants.

When she opened the door, she expected to see Peeta. Instead, the bedroom was empty, not a soul but Katniss now occupied it.

Katniss sat on the undone bed and thought.

She thought for a few minutes and then she got up and left.

She wanted to find a hiding spot and tend to her broken self. Her life felt upside down. Peeta was right. She _had _changed. Gale had made her change. She was a scared and weak coward- all thanks to him. She was lacking the bravery she once had. She couldn't tell Peeta.

She couldn't.

Katniss opened the bedroom door and looked around for Gale or Peeta.

She feared them. She feared Gale the most, obviously. But she feared Peeta a little bit, too.

Despite that he had kissed her goodnight, she still felt like Peeta didn't care much anymore.

He left her in bed without a word! Not even a touch; not on the head, hip, cheek or leg or arm. Nothing.

Usually if Peeta got up early and felt like leaving the room, he would give Katniss gentle kisses all over her face, trying to softly wake her up lovingly and sweetly with them. He would stroke her cheek or her hair too. If they had gotten intimate the previous night, he would touch her on the hip or on her legs. When she woke up, Peeta would whisper where he was going. He had done this several times in 13.

But this was the first time Peeta hadn't woken her up. She didn't feel his lips graze along hers this morning. Maybe overnight he'd changed his mind about this whole 'secret' thing. Maybe he was angry with her.

_I'm at home, on my own_

_Check my phone, nothing though_

_Act busy, Order In_

_Pay TV_

_Its agony_

Katniss strolled around the mansion, observing the large murals hanging on the wall. There were shelves that held precious-looking antiques. She walked barefoot along the dark red carpet.

She could hear some footsteps behind her.

"Katniss!" It was a boy, that's all she knew.

She turned around, doubting it would be Gale.

Instead, it was bronze-haired Finnick at the end of the hallway.

She stood her ground and watched him come closer to her. He was probably the only boy in her life whom she had no fear of.

Finnick walked a bit faster until he was about two feet away from Katniss. He noticed her messy hair.

"Hey. How have you been?"

"Fine."

"Yeah?" He seemed curious.  
"Sure."

"Why is that?"

Katniss shrugged.

"Look, I wanted to… ask you something, Katniss."

Katniss's eyelids were heavy so her eyes stayed down at her and Finnick's feet. "Mm hm. What is it?"

"Tell me what happened," He said, sounding serious. "Between you and Gale." His name brought her head up.

"I saw the way you were looking at him. You looked scared. Plus, you've changed. Ever since that night we spent at Tigris's."  
"Why do you care?"  
"Because I want to help. I'm your friend. I just want to help."

There was silence. Great.

She was telling Finnick.

But not Peeta. And he's the one who should know out of everyone Katniss knows. Her lover. Her protector. The boy who loves her with all her heart and makes sure she's safe. The boy who sacrificed himself for his girlfriend who was carrying their baby.

In Peeta and Katniss's case, sacrificing himself meant his lover was going to get hurt. Both internally and externally. But he wouldn't know. _Hopefully, _Katniss thought.

"He hurt you, didn't he?"

"I guess you could say that."

"What did he do to you?"

Katniss looked up at his sea green eyes. The moment Katniss's eyes closed, her lip puckered and she started to cry.

She grabbed onto Finnick's shirt and pulled herself towards him. She buried her face in his chest.

Finnick looked down at her in shock. His arms slowly wrapped around her. Katniss muffled her whimpers and cried into his shirt and recalled the pain she felt between her legs after Gale raped her. Compared to the pain she felt a few hours after she first made love with Peeta, the one Gale caused was the strongest and worst.

Bastard.

"Katniss…?" Finnick raised her chin and brushed a wisp of hair away from her face. He kissed her forehead.

Katniss didn't care though. She knew his kiss was supposed to be comforting.

_I may cry, ruining my makeup_

_Wash away all the things you've taken_

_And I don't care if I don't look pretty,_

_Big girls cry when their hearts are breaking._

After the kiss, Katniss wrapped her arms around his neck and cried into his shoulder.

Finnick patted her back and hair. "Don't cry, Katniss. I know you're tough."

She ignored him and continued crying.

_Big girls cry when their hearts are breaking._

One of the nurses that took care of her in the hospital told her it was better to cry because you release the trauma or misery inside you. It seemed true so she did.

"Katniss." Finnick pulled her head away and looked her in the eye. "I remember hearing… things. That night in the basement."

Katniss hid her face in his neck and gripped his shirt harder.

"He raped you," Finnick muttered.

When she heard the word 'raped', she stopped crying. Instead she just held onto Finnick and let her final tears wash down her face.

"Is that what happened?"

Katniss nodded very slightly.

Finnick remembered hearing those noises.

Katniss's muffled screaming.

"**Let go of me! NO! NO!"**

After those screams, she started to yelp as if her legs were getting twisted.

There was a memory for Katniss, though.

Probably the one that haunted her the most. It was true, she was pure. Or, once was. Gale made her do something she never thought that people had the idea of doing.

Because Peeta never made her do it. And she had never thought of it. Everything she had done in bed with Peeta was all she knew about sex.

Not until Gale raped her was when she knew everything.

Every time Katniss would try to get away from Gale and get up to the door, he would pull her down, then punish her.

Each time it was something different. It happened three times. Every single 'punishment' sending more and more agony and disgust through Katniss.

The first time, Gale pinned her onto her stomach and climbed onto her, and pushed into her from behind.

The second time, he ran his lips along every part of her body.

And the last time, Katniss finally learned her lesson, in Gale's mind. It was the memory that haunted her, the one that Peeta never made her do.

He forced her to perform oral on him.

Peeta had done it on her

But he never told her to do it on him, and she never had the idea.

So when Gale made her do it, she was disgusted with him.

Her best friend. Her best friend raped her.

Finnick embraced her. "I'm sorry, Katniss. I'm sorry."

"Don't tell him." Katniss whispered.

"What? Who? Peeta? He doesn't know?"

Katniss shook her head.

"Katniss! But he's the one who should know. Not me. He has no idea? None at all?"  
"No…"  
"Why doesn't he know?"  
"I don't want him to. I don't know what he'll do…"  
"You need to tell him. He loves you, Katniss. He should know this. Did you tell the doctors?"  
"No."  
"Your mother? Prim?"  
"No." She said with an edge in her voice.  
"Hell, you should've told the doctors."  
"Why them? I don't trust anyone from the Capitol. Not anymore. That's none of their business." She wiped away her tears.

The way they stood in front of each other made them look like lovers.

"It's totally their business. They're doctors and are meant to help you. Gale could have diseases."

"Gale doesn't have diseases."

"You don't know that. Not all of them are visible."

"Well I didn't… see anything. He doesn't have any. He was a virgin until… that night in the basement. He doesn't have any." She repeated.

"Well not all of them are transmitted through sexual intercourse. There's mother to child, too."  
"So what? You're saying his mother has diseases?"

"There's a hazard that if he got you infected your baby could get infected too."  
When he mentioned the baby, she realized it.

She realized that she was in trouble.

"You have to tell the doctors."

But Katniss was still scared.

The only way they would confirm it was if they… if they…

Katniss shook her head. "No… no."

"Katniss."  
"I'm not letting them. I can't. I'm just going to have to see for myself. Once the baby's born." _That is, if it's not dead._

"Why? Just…"

Katniss shook her head. "You wouldn't understand."  
Finnick sighed. "Tell Peeta."  
"No." She said firmly.

"Why? Why not? He needs to know Katniss, he's your boyfriend."

"I… I can't, I just can't." She was on the verge of crying again.

"He'll understand."

"No, he won't!" She cried.

"He will! He loves you! He'll help you get over the trauma."

"It's not that I'm afraid of mostly. He doesn't know why Gale raped me."  
"Alright. Tell me, then. Why did he rape you?"

"It was my idea."

_It was my idea._

Her words echoed in his ears. Her idea? She suggested it? Katniss started to cry and hugged Finnick.

"It was my stupid idea! I was just so… so… depressed after I thought he was killed!"

It made sense now. Katniss wanted to have sex with Gale because she was depressed.

"I wanted to for the first few minutes… but then I just stopped him, and told him I didn't want to do it anymore," She whimpered.

"And that's when he raped you." Finnick pulled her closer and petted her black hair.

"And that when he…" Katniss was cut off by a loud wail. "Don't tell him! Please! Finnick, please don't tell Peeta, please, please-!"  
"I won't tell him, I won't… shh…. It's okay. It's okay."

"I'm a slut." She wailed.

"No Katniss, you're… you're not a slut… he just… hurt you, that's all. It's not your fault it happened."

Except that it was. It was all her fault. Finnick just didn't want to see her cry like this anymore. He remembered her noises and felt a pang of pity for her.

"I'm sorry. I'm sorry that happened to you, Katniss. I truly am. I'm sorry."

…

Katniss didn't see Peeta that whole day.

When she went to bed, it was 11:30 P.M, and there was no sign of him. After about 20 minutes of trying to sleep, she came to her senses because she heard the door open.

She sat up and saw Peeta.

"I'm sorry."  
"It doesn't matter." Katniss sighed. "Just come to bed with me and sleep. I'm too tired to argue with you." She yawned.

"Fair enough." Peeta replied. Peeta slipped off his hoodie so he went to bed in jeans and his undershirt.

Katniss snuggled up next to him and embraced him tightly.

"I love you Katniss." He whispered, then kissed her nose. "_No matter what."_

**Noot noot**


	30. Chapter 29

**Just for those people who are telling me 'Katniss should just get over it' : the reason Katniss isn't recuperating properly is because she was RAPED! People don't just get over something so traumatic like rape in a week. Sure, Katniss looks OOC but it's because of the huge amount of trauma she has been through. Can you imagine how hard it must be to get over rape, 2 fights to the death AND a war at the same time?**

**And the reason why Katniss won't tell Peeta at the moment is because she lost a lot of self-confidence after Gale raped her. She also doesn't trust anyone as easily as she used to. She needs time to recuperate.**

**If you don't like the way Katniss is acting, then just consider what I've said. I'm trying to make this fanfiction realistic. Katniss may be badass most of the time, but if you have read Mockingjay, then you'll know that Katniss isn't very badass at the end before the epilogue. And that is, she wasn't raped in the book. **

**Anyways, the teaser trailer may have been a teaser but it was DAMN AMAZING. Just imagine how amazing the actual trailer will be HOOOOLY**

**This is a long chapter! Sorry for the long wait :3**

**Anyways, I may not update again for a while. Sorry guys for the strange updating- schedule. **

_In the dark_

_And I'm right on the middle mark_

_I'm just in the tier of everything that rides below the surface_

Peeta was brushing hair out of her face. She slept peacefully next to him, her breathing calm and slow. Her black tresses spilled around her head and Peeta had been sniffing her locks continuously for 10 minutes. Because, well, they smelt nice. Not like her home, not anymore. She had lost the scent to her home in the Quarter Quell and he missed it. Because she didn't smell like herself anymore. Most of the time she smelt like sweat or some mild soap. Katniss never liked smelling intensely like flowers or fruits.

He had been awake for about thirty minutes now. Feeling bad about how he spent a whole day away from her. Thinking about going home. And now, he forgave her a little bit after their fight. He never liked fighting with her, despite they had only had tiny fights with each other before, like when Katniss was considering abortion. If she didn't want to tell him, then fine. He didn't want to force her to do anything.

_And I watch from a distance seventeen_

_And I'm short of the others dreams of being golden and on top_

_It's not what you painted in my head_

Today, he wanted her to be happy.

Despite that today was the day.

The day when the Mockingjay would kill Snow. Peeta knew she was anxious, but she was also angry and wanted to kill him.

Peeta came back to his senses when he heard something shift. He looked back at Katniss and realized her head shifted. A quiet and small moan came from the back of her throat.

Her noises soon became words and Peeta was able to make them out. He felt sorrow when he heard her.

She was dreaming of her daddy.

She whimpered and soon could hear her telling her father something.

"Run, daddy…" She murmured. "…Run before they go off."

Peeta slowly and gently scooped Katniss up in his arms and held her. He buried his nose in her black hair and she continued to wriggle. He kissed her head and held her closer. Tears came out of Katniss's closed eyes.

_It's not what you painted in my head_

_There's so much there instead of all the colors that I saw_

Peeta watched her until she started to thrash and scream in his arms.

"NO! No! Daddy!"

Peeta hugged her tightly, pressing her head against his chest.

She calmed down when she woke up. She felt his heat and clawed at his shirt. Peeta felt like crying himself. Knowing that his daddy was gone too.

Katniss felt his body start to shudder. "Peeta…?" She pulled her head away to see him crying. "Oh… Peeta." Katniss cupped his cheeks and pressed her forehead against his. "What's wrong?" She whispered.

"I heard you. You… you were dreaming of your daddy." He mumbled.

"I was." Katniss wiped her tears away. "But I'm okay. It was just a dream."

_And all these _sorrows_ I have seen_

_They lead me to believe_

_That everything's a mess_

Peeta continued to cry.

Katniss thought back to what she saw in her sleep. Her daddy, who looked like he was so near to her, but so far away. If he hadn't died, she probably wouldn't be here with Peeta.

After a few minutes, the tears came back to Katniss and she cried with her partner. They held each other and mourned over their fathers. When one of their cries would get too loud, the other would hush them.

_We all are living in a dream,_

_But life ain't what it seems_

"I love you," Peeta told her.

It took a while for Katniss to respond. "I love you too." She said quietly.

Peeta wiped her tears away and kissed her forehead. He looked down at his and Katniss's legs. She was sitting criss-crossed between his legs. He looked at her nightgown and took into fact how nice it looked on her. It was short sleeved, but had a hem about 4 inches below her knees. It was a rich lavender color and was made of silk. Peeta embraced her and she buried her face in his neck. Peeta kissed her shoulder.

Peeta's eyes wandered down at her collarbone and he saw a pink mark. It wasn't the scar that he liked, though. The mark was on Katniss's scar, but it was deeper shade of pink.

It looked like a hickey, but he knew it was bruise. He _thought_ he knew it was a bruise. Because he could have never thought that Katniss was raped while he was presumed dead. It was a hickey that Katniss had been trying to hide.

Katniss held his face in her hands and kissed him eagerly. She liked the feeling of his soft lips against her dry ones. She let his tongue slide into her mouth and devour her. Peeta kissed her feverishly while she kissed him a bit more on the side of 'softly'.

_Oh everything's a mess._

Then the door swung open.

"Up, up, up! Today is a big, big—oh!"

Effie was cut off by Katniss and Peeta.

They pulled their lips away before Effie came into the room so she saw them just in time.

"I'm sorry, you two, I thought you were both sleeping."

Peeta chuckled. "It's alright, Effie. We've been awake for some time now." Katniss looked way from her escort and her cheeks flushed red and her ears felt hot.

"Oh. Well, in that case… I'm here to get you two ready." In Effie's hands were two clothing bags- like the ones for dresses- and one of them contained Katniss's Mockingjay suit. "The others will be here soon."

Katniss and Peeta got out of bed and the rest of the stylists came in. Effie, Venia and Octavia were the two who were helping Katniss get ready. Flavius and Portia went with Peeta.

They led her into a huge bathroom and let her soak in the tub in privacy. She still felt like it wasn't too private, so she pressed her knees to her chest and held them in place with her arms. Her grey eyes looked over at the black Mockingjay suit that was draped across a red and gold cushioned seat in the bathroom.

She closed her eyes and slowly started to let her hands wander. Her hands ran along her stomach and down to the soft skin on the inside of her thighs.

That's when she realized how badly she craved Peeta's touch. She imagined her hands being Peeta's.

Half of herself wanted to have sex with him again.

And the other half didn't.

Because she was still a coward about sex. But he'd understand… right?

There was a knock on the door and Katniss's grey eyes shot open and she pulled her hands away from her thighs. "Yes?"  
"Katniss, we're coming in, okay sweetie?" Octavia informed her.

"Um… wait…" Panic shot through her and Katniss quickly jumped out of the tub and grabbed a towel. She dried her body off in a rush and then wrapped the towel around her body. "You can come in now."

The door opened and the three women came in. Effie came in holding a small kit which held makeup. Venia was holding a large box filled with other things. Octavia unclogged the bathtub and then started to cry off Katniss's hair with a towel. They had her sit down and Katniss tightened her grip on her towel. She didn't want her stylists to see her bruises. Hell, she didn't want them to see her body at all. She felt ashamed of her body.

And it was Gale's fault.

They dried Katniss's hair properly with a hair drier and then the time came when she was asked to remove her towel.

"No." Katniss responded firmly.

"Katniss, we need to get clothe son you, silly." Venia chuckled.

"Can I change into it myself? Without any of you looking at me?"

"Well, you'll need help, but you can put on the jacket-"

"Then I'll do that." Katniss got up and Effie handed her the jacket and the pants and her underwear.

She headed into the closes off- section of the bathroom that held the toilet. The glass was one-way, so she was able to see from the inside but her stylist couldn't see her. It was like that in the shower too.

Katniss looked down at her naked body. The bruises on her hips looked darker. But they didn't hurt as much anymore. She could see hickeys on her collarbones and some on her breasts. Between her legs there were red claw marks and a few bruises too. The red scars on her arms and legs were from the war. She recalled what she felt immediately after Gale came.

It made more disgust flush over her. It was a warm, frothy feeling inside her abdomen that shocked her, because she knew what it meant. But when she would have sex with Peeta, she enjoyed the feeling, and it made her happy to know that the frothy feeling inside of her abdomen was Peeta.

Once she got her clothes on, she headed out. They helped her into the rest of the suit and painted her nails black and pulled her hair back in her braid.

They applied black makeup to her eyes and then Katniss thanked them. They pulled their Mockingjay into a group hug and kissed her cheeks, telling her how much they have loved working with her. Before they left, Katniss got a surprise.

Little Prim entered the bathroom with Lily. Prim's hair was done in a Dutch braid similar to her sister's, but instead of going diagonally across her head, it went down one side of her head near her left ear.

Seeing her sister brought a smile to Katniss's face. "Prim!"

The two sisters embraced each other and laughed softly. Katniss realized her sister was walking. She pulled back and looked down. Prim's legs were covered by white leggings she was wearing under her dark brown dress. Prim rolled up her leggings and Katniss saw the shiny silver and white metal that replaced half of one leg, and the other by three fourths.

Prim handed Katniss back her pin. "I thought you'd need this. Because… well y'know. You're ending the war, so I think it'll be important."

She thanked her and Prim wished her luck.

…

Katniss sat in the bathroom alone, ready to go. She was facing a mirror, looking herself in the eye. Katniss closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

_Just one more kill._

And again, there was a knock at the door. Louder than the others.

Katniss didn't say anything and pretended as if no one was standing outside her door.

The person let themselves out and Katniss looked over to face icy grey eyes that made her go limp.

Katniss quickly got up and stood her ground.

Gale approached her. In his hand was her quiver, with one arrow inside it. Katniss couldn't get rid of the fear that was so visible in her eyes. She shivered.

"Get out." She whispered hoarsely.

He didn't listen. "I came to give you this." He said, shoving it towards her.

"Why you? Of all people?"

"I volunteered." He said with anger in his voice. Anger?  
Katniss's widened in shock and she took a few steps back, getting ready to run to the bathroom's other door.

Gale pounced on her and Katniss immediately started to scream.  
**"GET OFF!"**

He made sure to pin her legs down with his. Gale whipped something out of a pocket on his jacket and tied it around Katniss's mouth. Hysterical cries were emitted from her throat. They were muffled by the strap of cloth on her mouth. She thrashed harder and tried to punch him, but he grabbed both her hands in one of his and pinned them above her head. Then he pulled another piece of rope from a pocket and tied Katniss's hands together.

Beneath the cloth on her mouth, she screamed.  
"PEETA! PEETA! NO!"

She screamed and shrieked for Peeta. Where was he?!

Gale let his free hand go down to her pants. There were so many straps and buckles all over her suit that he couldn't free her of her clothing without two hands. But if he used two hands, Katniss would be able to get away, despite her hands were tied together, it would still be an advantage.

He was able to shove his hand underneath her jacket and loosen her vest by pulling his hand outward. Gale's hand snaked under her protective gear and touched her belly.

When his hand made contact with her skin Katniss stopped thrashing and stayed still, her eyes wide in horror. She felt his hand run along the skin on her torso. When his hand reached her breasts Katniss bucked against him and ripped her hands away from his grasp. Katniss was able to turn him over and punch his face with her elbow. She released noises of anger and frustration. Katniss rubbed the cloth on her mouth hard against her arm until it slipped off her mouth. "Fuck you, you son of a bitch! I am not your fucking slut!" Gale grabbed her by the waist and threw her off of him. She hit the tile floor hard. She let out a yelp and tried to wriggle herself to a sit-up position but Gale crawled up to her.

"You're not just _my_ slut." He hissed at her. "You're Peeta's little slut too. This is your fault. If you hadn't been a slut in that basement, this wouldn't have happened to you, Mockingjay. This is your own slutty fault that I'm fucking you!"

"PEETA!" She shrieked. Gale slapped her hard and then grabbed her face.

"You shut up, now, Mockingjay. Or else you're gonna get it."

But at the same time, Gale knew he couldn't rape her here. Not with so many people around.

He got off of her and kicked her hard on the side of her leg.

He then left.

Katniss was left on the floor. Panting hard. Cringing at the pain in her right leg. She undid the knots on the cloths Gale tied to her. She didn't feel like crying. She just needed to end this war. She took the quiver that was on the floor with her.

Katniss left the bathroom and then opened the bedroom's door.

She walked to Haymitch's room, where he was speaking with Effie and Peeta.

She felt guilt wash over her when her eyes met with Peeta's.

"Ready to go, sweetheart?" Haymitch asked. Katniss nodded. Peeta walked over to her quickly and held her at the hips.

"You okay?" Katniss nodded. Peeta nodded back and gave her a quick peck. They heard Haymitch snort.

…

Katniss was led out to the city circle. Before she walked out into the public, Peeta grabbed her hand and embraced her.

"Ready?"

Katniss nodded. "I'll be fine. I don't see why you're worried." Katniss told him. He could hear anger in her voice.

Peeta pulled away and pressed his forehead against hers. Katniss kept her gaze down. "Katniss,"

She didn't look up. He tilted her chin upwards and she faced his blue eyes. She leapt off the ground slightly and hugged him again. Peeta held her off the ground a few inches. Katniss buried her face in his neck and breathed in the scent of his uniform. Peeta petted her hair and kissed her head. "I love you, Mockingjay." Peeta murmured. "Shoot straight." Katniss separated herself from her lover. He brushed hair behind her ears. She turned to face the open and started to walk out.

It was bright and sunny, despite it was still feeling cold. It was quiet and people of different districts were standing on the edge of the city circle while Capitol citizens sat in the stands. Far off in the distance, Katniss could see everyone else surrounding the area where Snow was tied up to poll. Cressida. Pollux. Finnick and Annie. Effie. Haymitch. Prim and Lily. Gale. He looked smug. _Bastard_

And Peeta would be joining them soon.

Coin was there too. Obviously.

Katniss noticed several of the people who were surrounding the edge of the city circle started to walk behind Katniss.

There were people playing a simple rhythm on the large drums; similar to the ones that Katniss saw during the tribute parade for the Quarter Quell.

She walked closer.

And closer.

Until she was about 15 meters away from President Snow. He had a white rose in his lapel which was resting over his heart.

_Fuck you._

He gave her a smile.

_Fuck you!_

Katniss's fingers pulled the bow string back towards her cheek.

It was quiet; the drums had stopped playing. Something caught her eye, not too far in front of her, next to Prim.

It was Peeta's golden hair shining in the sun.

_How did you get there so fast?_

Katniss looked back at the President tightening her grip on her bow, which was ready to kill.

Her grey eyes looked up at Coin.

Katniss changed the target and let go of the string.

The arrow went through her heart and she plummeted down to the concrete floor.

Katniss put down her bow. She stared in awe at the dead body. She did it.

Suddenly, in a flash, everything changed. People started to yell and run. The guards ran after Katniss and she backed up a few feet. President Snow started to laugh, and then he coughed blood, spewing out his life.

_Go to hell, you fucker._

And that was the last time Katniss saw him. He was blocked from few by the crowd as the guards got closer.

"_Katniss!"_

Peeta's voice caught her attention. She tried to look over the guards and his blond hair popped out in the see of the grey-clothed guards. He was shoving and pushing past them, trying to get to her.

Katniss was yanked backwards by other guards and she fell to the ground. She started to fight, kicking and punching and screaming. **"Get off of me! Get off, you bastards!"**

_But I wanna dream_

_I wanna dream_

_Leave me to dream_

Peeta shoved passed everyone else and helped Katniss up. He hit a guard in the face hard and tried to pull Katniss through with him.

"Let her go!

_In the eyes_

_Of a teenage crystallized_

_Oh the prettiest of lights that hang the hallways of the home_

He could feel the guards pulling at him, tearing him away from his beloved.

"Katniss!" A girl cried in the distance.

"PRIM!" Katniss screamed back. "Prim!"

A new fear ran over Katniss. _Prim!_

_And the cries from the strangers out at night_

"No! NO! Let go!"

The guards broke Katniss and Peeta apart and she turned into wild animal. "PEETA!" She shrieked.

_They don't keep us up at night_

_We have the curtains drawn and closed_

_We all are living in a dream,_

She feared that the guards would get Prim and Lily, and Peeta, and take them all over again.

Katniss screamed for Peeta and he kept responding. She fell to the ground again and started to sob.

"Please don't hurt them! Leave them alone, please!"

_But life ain't what it seems_

_Oh everything's a mess_

_And all these sorrows I have seen_

And another fear swallowed Katniss when they blindfolded her. They put handcuffs on her and the fear she got from Gale arrived.

Her screaming got louder and louder.

_They lead me to believe_

_That everything's a mess_

They were going to punish Prim and her mother and Peeta.

And herself. They were going to hurt her the same way Gale did.

At least, that's what she thought.

_But I wanna dream_

_I wanna dream_

_Leave me to dream_

Katniss continued kicking and screaming, and biting for Peeta and Prim. They called back to her, desperately. Katniss could hear others screaming too. She felt herself get lifted off the ground. The guards started to carry her out of the city circle. She squirmed and cussed at them. "You fucking liars!" She hissed.

_I know all your reasons_

_To keep me from seeing_

_Everything is actually a mess_

They carried and dragged her through something that seemed like a maze. She waited until they threw her in a dark room, tied her up and ripped her clothes off and made her feel the pain she deserved.

Instead, they placed her in a bright room and removed the handcuffs. They all disappeared and Katniss heard them lock the door.

_But now I am leaving_

_All of us were only dreaming_

She lifted the blindfold off her eyes and noticed she was in her old room in the tribute center.

_Everything is actually a mess._


	31. Chapter 30

**Helloooo**

**Chapter 30! Wow, it's been a while since I first started this fan fiction, way back in February. **

_In a tree by the brook, there's a songbird who sings,_

_Sometimes all of our thoughts are misgiven._

Katniss sat in the shower, with the heated water batting down on her olive skin. Her black, wet hair acted as a curtain around her face. She didn't know what was going on. But she had the feeling that Peeta and her family were all going to be okay.

She hugged her knees to her chest and rocked herself slowly on the floor, wanting to feel Peeta's strong warm arms wrapped around her.

She had only been in her old tribute center room for about 3 hours and she had spent 2 hours sitting on the bathroom floor. Oh, how she wanted to go home. To go home and heal her wounds. Watch over her family, living an easier life than before, next to Peeta.

But who knew how long she was going to be in here.

_There's a feeling I get when I look to the west,_

_And my spirit is crying for leaving._

After 20 more minutes she turned off the shower and got out. There wasn't a towel, no clothes even. The wardrobe had been emptied clean. Once she was out of the shower she stopped and saw her reflection in the mirror.

Her eyes skimmed down to parts of her body that were covered with bruises or little wounds. She shifted to the side so she could see from another angle. There were still red scratches between her legs that came from Gale's fingers. The hickeys on her collarbone and chest remained same as before.

How could he.

Her best friend raped her.

Katniss got out of the bathroom to find that her Mockingjay suit which she had left on the mattress was gone. In its place was a paper robe.

She approached the mattress and slipped the thing on. She lied down on the soft mattress, and fell asleep.

A few hours passed, and she woke from a nightmare forming. Her skin was dry but hair wasn't. She looked up at the bejewelled ceiling, and then at the large window in the room, sighing.

Katniss sat up on the bed slowly and looked at the window that stood in front of her. It was snowing lightly, and the Capitol looked different. There were destroyed buildings and rubble everywhere. She wondered how they were going to clean it all up.

_In my thoughts I have seen rings of smoke through the trees,_

_And the voices of those who stand looking._

Katniss looked down at her feet. That's when she remembered she was pregnant. A bit over a month. About 7 weeks. She had forgotten. It wasn't something that she was very happy about. She was still scared to have a baby.

Her cold hand slid slowly through the opening on her robe at the front, down to her abdomen. That's when she realized there was a bump.

A tiny one, right on her abdomen. She didn't expect the bump to be noticeable at 7 weeks.

Was the baby really still alive? She extended her fingers and stroked the soft skin with her thumb.

"Hey." She whispered.

She wasn't sure if the baby was still there. Maybe she was speaking to emptiness.

"I don't know if you're still in there. But if you are, I hope you're listening." She told her baby. "I'm sorry if I don't make it out of here."

_Because if I die, you do too._

"Your daddy was right, you know. About not taking those pills. I don't know what I was thinking. I was being so stupid. I'm so sorry." Katniss apologized. "I don't know why I actually agreed with Coin. But she's paid the price, hasn't she?"

Katniss stood up to get closer to the window. "How is it in there?"

"I'm guessing better than out here. You're lucky. You're not going to be born in some ugly world like the one your father and I were born into."

Katniss still had the feeling that it was girl. She had had this feeling for 4 weeks, after being given the news about the baby. "I thought I lost your daddy." Katniss murmured. "Back in those tunnels, when he sacrificed himself for the two of us. But it was luck, too. He didn't get ripped to shreds by the mutts… or blown to bits."

"You do know that I love you. Right? Same with your daddy."

_And it's whispered that soon, if we all call the tune,_

_Then the piper will lead us to reason._

…

Peeta woke in the mansion, in his and Katniss's room. _Katniss. _His hands searched the bed but it was just him, alone.

He remembered seeing guards swarm around Katniss like wasps, and then separating the two of them. The guards tied Peeta's hands behind his back and then sedated him, because he had already injured 5 guards.

Who knows what they were doing to her.

Torturing her the same way they tortured him. He panicked and shot out of the bed. He noticed he was in a sweater and simple, cotton sweatpants. He dashed out of the bedroom and to the hallway. He threw Haymitch's bedroom door open and found him drinking.

He walked up to his mentor and knocked the bottle of liquor out of his hand, causing Haymitch to roll his eyes in anger.

"Where is she?!" Peeta demanded. "Where's Katniss?!"

"Calm the fuck down. She's in trial."

"Trial?!"  
"Lower your tone, it's giving me a headache."  
"What do you mean by trial?" Peeta hollered.  
Haymitch picked up the glass on the carpet floor and struck it down on the wooden table. "She killed Coin, not Snow. She's in trial because of killing Coin."  
"What are they doing to her?"

"I assure you, Peeta, the girl's fine, she's gonna be locked in some room by herself for a while."

Peeta turned around and covered his face with his hands.  
"How long?" He groaned.  
"A few weeks. I don't know."

"What… where is she though? Some cold cell? Fuck! Where the fuck is she?!"  
"Peeta, she's safe. I can tell you that. She's in the Capitol. Somewhere. I don't know exact—" Haymitch stopped speaking when he saw Peeta fall to the floor. He moaned.

"Why can't they just leave us the fuck alone?" He whimpered. His tone changed to anger. He pulled at his hair and snarled. "I swear to god if they do anything to her, I am going _rip_ their guts out, one _bloody_ gut at a time!" He screamed.

Haymitch saw Peeta's body start to shudder. His quiet sobs filled the room. "She has to be okay. They can't just… just… take her from me!"  
"Peeta." Haymitch walked up to him and gave him a slap on the back.  
"Don't… touch me!" He cried, smacking his hand away. "She's all I have! _They're_ all I have!"

"What? 'They're'?"  
"She's pregnant, you idiot. Hell, who knows what they could be doing to her-"

"Peeta!" Haymitch yelled. Peeta looked up at his mentor with misty blue eyes surrounded by red sclera. "Katniss is not going to be punished in any way. She's just being put in some room, but they won't touch her. I promise you. Katniss only did that for one reason only. She doesn't think the way she used to." Haymitch explained. "She's insane."

Peeta buried his face in his hands. His Katniss? Insane?  
"Think about it. She's been through too much. More than you. She's suffering from insanity."

The truth is,

Katniss _had _been through too much.

She lost her father at a young age. She was put into 2 Hunger Games, got Peeta taken from her for more than a month, and then led a revolution. And she'd nearly lost the two people she loved the most to the Capitol during the war. Thank god she didn't. If Prim had not have ran from the bombs, or if Peeta had not heard Katniss's warning while he was fighting the mutts, Katniss would be shattered. She'd be in worse condition than she currently was. Or maybe she wouldn't even be alive.

Then she was raped by her best friend.

But that neither Peeta nor Haymitch knew.

…

Katniss rocked herself slowly in the corner of the room. She cried and sang softly to herself and the baby.

She sang the Meadow song. The song she sang to Prim when she was younger and to Rue as she died.

How badly she needed Peeta's touch. She wanted to feel his warm body behind hers, with her sitting criss crossed between his legs and his arms wrapped around her.

It felt she had been in here for weeks.

It had only been three days.

Three days of staring out the window, watching snow fall and melt. Katniss had no idea how much longer they would keep her locked up. They fed her 3 meals per day with pills at the side of each dish.

Katniss would have nightmares. Ones about her and Gale in the furnace room. Others about the war, and of course, the Games.

She would sit in the shower, her tears joining the stream of warm water.

She fell into depression on the fifth day and stopped eating for two days. She was keeping herself alive for the baby. If she wasn't pregnant, she'd thought of some weird way to commit suicide. Maybe drowning herself in the shower.

_And a new day will dawn for those who stand long,_

_And the forests will echo with laughter._

…

"Hey. Have you seen Katniss?"  
"No. Thought she'd be with you."

Peeta sighed. He'd asked Haymitch too- he had no idea where she was.

And now he was here, standing in front of Gale. "She's been missing since this morning."  
"Why would you think she'd be with me?" Gale scoffed.

"Well, you're one of the three people in this mansion who knew her well, and, I asked Haymitch but he had no idea either."

"She's probably in some closet. Crying."

Peeta felt mild anger run over him. "See, that's what I don't get."  
Gale raised his chin. "What?"  
"The way she's been acting. She's been wandering away from everyone lately. Plus she seems more fragile than before."

"It's just PTSD."

Peeta thought about Gale's words. There was silence for a few seconds.

"Why did you come ask me, anyways?"

"Well because you two are close."

_More like we were close. _"Closer than you two?" Gale laughed.

Peeta got angry by his comment. "I hope you didn't mean that."

Gale sneered. "Why is that? Because she's slept with you?"

Hot, bitter hatred washed over Peeta. This was none of his business. "Well, no offense, but you haven't been near her for a while. Saying that you're 'close' doesn't seem right." Peeta spat. "Plus she'd never sleep with you, Gale." Gale laughed again, making Peeta confused- and very, very concerned about Katniss. Maybe she had been doing something with Gale, long before she fell for Peeta. But he knew that he was the first person Katniss had sex with.

She stained the sheets red on their first time of intimacy. "Well you're underestimating your girlfriend."

Peeta froze and Gale turned around and walked away.

…

Then Peeta woke from his dream, quickly sitting up. He was on the floor, wearing only boxer briefs. He fell asleep on the floor.

He felt anxious when he thought about Katniss. He kept holding on to hope that she was truly okay. That no one was beating, starving or touching her in any way.

It felt like their roles were reversed now. Was this what Katniss felt when he was taken by the Capitol?

He kept imagining her lovely appearance and he started to shudder. He wanted to touch her, see her smile and hear her laugh.

It was about 2 A.M, and the room was dark. Peeta ran his hands along his curls in the opposite way it was growing. He remembered his dream and he lifted his face from between his knees.

"_Well you're underestimating your girlfriend."_

Peeta feared Katniss wasn't a virgin when they first got intimate. But he kept remembering the blood on the bed, and how he got scared for a second and then realized what it meant.

He calmed down and then walked to the wardrobe and put on sweatpants and a cotton white T- shirt.

Peeta crawled into the bed and imagined his Katniss curled into a tight ball in a corner. Crying because of her nightmares since she didn't have the boy with the bread to calm her down with loving words or kisses.

The thought made Peeta cry, too. He wanted to comfort her. And he knew she was going to be in pain for who knew how long. He felt like he could hear them; her cries. Sobbing and weeping, trying to get over the horrible haze of her nightmares without Peeta.

_And as we wind on down the road_

_Our shadows taller than our soul._

_There walks a lady we all know_

_Who shines white light and wants to show._

**Alright, I'm probably not going to post for a long time, and I'm really sorry you guys. I've been super busy the past few weeks and despite its summer, I'm still going to be busy. I'm sorry the update schedule has changed. Don't forget to leave a review!**

**I guess I should tell you all as well- that this story is nearly over.**

**That there are only like 2-3 chapters left**


	32. Chapter 31

**Updating will probably slow down for the first few weeks of summer. I may not update at all for a while**

**But I have a little surprise for you all once this fan fiction ends. Love you guys, and thank you all so much for so many follows and favs!**

_Shadows on my back are moving slow_

_They twist behind like_

_Quiet leaves in the wind_

_And as I ride_

_These horses will they fly_

Katniss wriggled on the mattress, fighting off a nightmare.

One that made her want to cry. But in her nightmare, she liked it. And still, when she woke up, she had no idea why she had dreamt of something so disgusting and insane.

At first, she saw Peeta, and by the look on his face, she knew that they were going to make love. He laid her down on the bed and she gave Peeta a loving stare. If this had happened in real life, she wouldn't allow it. She wanted Peeta but at the same time was fearful of making love to him again.

They undressed and then started to kiss passionately. Peeta ran his hands along her body- which, in her dream, was free of scars and bruises. Katniss could feel another pair of hands on her. Her real self's heart dropped. It felt so real.

After she realized who it was, her body went limp.

She flopped down on the mattress, boneless, and let Peeta and Gale take over her body.

Her body l a 'cold and in a pool of sweat when she woke. She trembled, feeling scared and disgusted. Why didn't Peeta do anything? He didn't stop Gale. The two of them became a team, literally, and devoured her with their fingers and tongues together.

Katniss felt more repulsion wash over her. She knew in real life though, Peeta wouldn't had let that happen. He would protect her. And he would never do something to her without her consent.

Except, when he performed oral on her for the first time and she had no idea what he was doing. But she was lost in the haze of feeling love and want for him, so she let him do whatever he wanted. But he remained being gentle on her, not rough.

He wanted her to feel pleasure, not pain.

Katniss rolled around on the mattress.

It had been weeks. She had lost count after about a week. She would lay on the mattress, sometimes closing her eyes. After a few weeks, Katniss got used to feeling nothing but coolness on the other side of the bed, and she never expected to feel his warmth.

But she still wanted Peeta's warmth. She wanted to kiss his soft lips and listen to his heartbeat and his breathing.

_Falling hard_

_Falling high_

_Through your arms_

_Shadows in my head don't need no light_

_They stay through the night_

Katniss would lay down or sit anywhere. She managed to climb the large, empty wardrobe and touch the bejeweled ceiling. Her hands would go to the glass on the window, wondering if someone was watching her from outside. Or maybe these windows were like one way mirrors.

Sometimes, if she really needed it, she would let her hands wander down to the inside of her thighs. Her hands would become Peeta's.

She'd fall asleep on the floor and use the bathroom rug as her blanket when it got cold. Before she fell into a horrible depression on the third week, Katniss would speak to the baby.

But once the third week hit, she lost hope.

She lost all hope that there was a baby.

She bled on the floor when Gale raped her, plus she'd been in horrible anxiety for weeks.

That does it. It was gone.

_Without you_

_My lips are turning blue_

_The water pulls me down_

_I'm dreamed on bitter sound_

_This silence screams so loud_

Weeks passed. Slowly. Time passed ever so slowly. She didn't know what month it was. She'd lost track of time and didn't know what to do.

Wait a little longer? For what? Someone to get her, or until death came by itself?

_I'm locked up_

_Your kingdom's like a drug_

_The chains are made as glass_

_I'm breaking through the glow_

_I'm now just stroking off_

She would tell herself the same thing Peeta told her weeks ago. That she should be happy because her family was alive and that the war was over. Well, who knew if her family was alive? Maybe they were executed. Or maybe they're being tortured. Maybe Peeta was being tortured all over again. She needed him. She'd gone insane.

When the thought came that Peeta was locked in a cell again, Katniss broke down.

She cried and sobbed and screamed. **"NO, NO, NO! PEETA!" **She rocked herself, then fell into complete insanity. She scratched herself on her wrists with her jagged nails (since they had been bitten and chewed, they got jagged). After many times of violently rubbing her nails against her wrists, blood began to seep from the scratched red skin.

Katniss pounded on the window and on the door. She grew extremely scared with the way she was acting. She needed Peeta.

She needed him. She'd gone insane.

_Through your arms_

_Shadows in my head don't need no light_

_They stay through the night_

Katniss stayed lying on the bed for several days. Who knew how many. Crying silently, after she had run out of energy to scream and cut herself. Her hair stuck to the tears on her face. Her eyes lids felt heavy with the amount of tears she was releasing.

…

Katniss was asleep. It was noon. In her dream, she heard clicking noises and then footsteps.

"Katniss?" Someone called.

Katniss's eyes opened. Her black hair shielded her face. She had been facing the window, and the sun was shining in her face.

Her eyes closed, only to open again in shock. She felt a hand on her head.

Slowly, with her body trembling, she looked up at her mentor.

"Hey sweetheart."

Her hair fell back into place. Was she dreaming? Was he really here? He sat on her bed and Katniss stared at him in shock. He petted her head and Katniss pulled her sore hands away from her chest. Her hands fell on Haymitch's leg. She let out little grunts and then rested her head on the thigh that was closest to her.

Haymitch smiled but felt remorse. She was actually insane. "We're going home."

Katniss raised her head again in question. "…Home…? But…"

"Yeah. Here." He placed a small stack of clothing on her back. "Change into these. I'll be waiting outside." He pinched her cheek and then got up to leave.

"Wait, Haymitch…" Katniss croaked. "Peeta… where's Peeta?"  
"He's okay. He's fine, they didn't do anything to him or Prim or your mother. They're all safe and sound. Don't worry about it."

This made Katniss relax for the first time in weeks. Katniss took a quick shower and washed away the dried blood on her wrists. That's when she noticed the scar on her wrist, which was the one she got in Tigris's basement. It was about the length of half of her thumb.

Katniss put on the clothes Haymitch gave her. A long sleeve black shirt and fitted brown pants, black boots. Before leaving the bathroom, she sat down on the cold, tiled floor and breathed deeply. She inhaled from her nose and then exhaled through her mouth.

She had a flashback and the third night of her and Peeta's intimacy came into mind; the night after Gale gave her a nosebleed by punching her in the center of her face.

It was probably one of the best nights she remembered.

It brought a smile to her face when she recalled that evening. She hadn't smiled for weeks.

She loved how after they both came, Peeta still laid over her, but he whispered things in her ear, and then kissed her all over her face.

It made her giggle, but then her giggles turned into pleased, happy- sounding, quiet and soft moans when Peeta kissed her chest softly and slowly.

Her thoughts were interrupted when there was a knock on the door.

Haymitch opened the door to find Katniss sitting in the corner.

"Hey. C'mon, let's go home."

Haymitch led her out the room and they started heading out of the tribute center. Katniss walked behind him quietly, looking down at the floor.

Then Haymitch took a different turn from the large doors which opened to the hovercraft landing pad. Katniss looked back at the large doors, confused.

"Where are we going? The exit's over there."

"Well, Katniss… You two are getting a checkup."

"Two?"

"The baby."

Katniss stopped in her tracks and gave him a worried look. "No. I'm not going in there." She whispered. Haymitch put his hands on her forearms.

"Katni—"

"No!" She ripped her hands away and instantly, tears poured down her face. "It's dead!" Katniss crumpled into a ball on the marble floor, next to Haymitch's feet. Her sobs filled the hall. "Peeta! Peeta!" She cried. Katniss went into a meltdown.

"Katniss!" His voice intensified. "He's waiting outside. Look—okay, just listen to me. If this baby's alive—"

"It's not alive! I haven't felt anything! Nothing! It can't be alive, it can't! It's… it's…" She stuttered. Haymitch made her stand up, and then embraced her. She trembled in his arms and cried harder. She was crying the same way she did after Snow cut her off when Peeta was being rescued from the Capitol.

_Do wear the rose with bloody thought_

_It lift you up_

_Then let you fall_

Haymitch felt something poking him. He separated himself from Katniss and that's when he noticed her belly.

There was a noticeable bump.

But he didn't expect to see it in 3 months. Usually it was noticeable at 5 months. "Look, Katniss. Do you see that?" Katniss looked down at the bump. For some reason, that was the time she realized that her belly had grown. "Do you think your stomach would be like that if the baby was dead? Of course not. You weren't like that 8 weeks ago."

_8 weeks? Is that how long it's been?_

"You can't just lose hope like that, Katniss. This baby is alive and it's your responsibility. Do… do you remember when you told Peeta and I- a long time ago- about how your mother stopped caring for you and Primrose after your father died?" Katniss nodded very slowly. "Do you see what I'm relating to?" Katniss nodded again.

"Yes." She murmured.

"Don't let the war stop you from having hope. It's over now. Just think, you and Peeta can raise the baby without anything to worry about. It won't grow up in the same dangerous world that we all grew up in. She… yeah… _she _will be the start of a new generation. And you have to care for her. Sure, you're very young to be having a baby… but luckily you have Peeta. That boy will never let you down. Sometimes I don't think you realize how much he loves you. He wants you to be safe. He doesn't want anyone hurting you. And, I mean, you've actually done a good job loving him for the past few months. You let him."  
"Let him?"  
Haymitch snickered. "You let him love you. He deserved it after all he's done for you. C'mon you know what I mean." Katniss blushed a bright shade of red.

"I… yeah. I do love him. I wouldn't have let him… um… you know… if…"

"Mm hm. Of course you wouldn't. Unless Snow was enough of an ass to make you have a baby with Peeta. I actually think he was close to saying it to you. But you made that choice on your own." Haymitch said. "But this one was an accident. Right?"

"Yes."

"And, you know something else that is good? You moved on from Gale, too."  
There. When Haymitch said his name, a shiver ran down her spine. "… Uh… right…?"  
Katniss started to shift uncomfortably. Her eyebrows showed worry.

"Well… I can't forgive him. Because he tried to kill Peeta. Plus those bombs that hurt Prim could've been his."  
"Then why are you—"

Katniss sighed and bit her lip. "Look." She mumbled. "I don't know what was wrong with me. I was being so stupid and… I just couldn't control myself after Gale said Peeta was dead."  
"What happened? Just tell me." Katniss's breathing quickened. Her mouth opened. "I got foolish. I was being so stupid and I wanted to… get my mind off of the shit I was in." She took a deep breath. Tear rising in her eyes again. "He… he… I wanted to stop, but he just…" Katniss started to cry. "He hurt me!"

Haymitch's eyes widened with shock. He hugged her again, petting her black hair.

"He raped me!" Katniss shrieked. She cried into her mentor's shoulder. "He raped me…!"

"Shh, Katniss…" Haymitch pulled her face away from his shoulder. "Does Peeta know about this?"

Katniss shook her head slowly, guilt washing over her clouded grey eyes.

"…You tell me and not Peeta?"  
"I'M SORRY! I can't! I can't do it! I can't tell Peeta! _You_ can't tell Peeta! Please don't tell him, promise me! Please!" Haymitch placed a finger on her lips.

"Shh, calm down. Katniss… I…"

"Please don't tell him," Katniss begged in a quiet whisper.

"He should know this, Katniss. But I won't if you don't want me to. But he needs to know someday."

"I don't want to tell him."

_Two rivers,_

_Flowing on the factory halls._

"Who else knows?"  
"Finnick. That's it."  
"Not Prim? Your mother…?"  
"No. Just you and Finnick." Haymitch put his hands on her shoulders.

"You need to tell Peeta someday. It will become much for you to handle."

_Like it isn't already._

"Katniss, if there's anyone else other than Prim that you love, it's Peeta. He loves you and he deserves to know so that he can care for you."

"Yeah." Katniss whimpered. It was barely audible.

"Now. Let's go see if that baby's alright. Okay?"

A few more tears went down her cheek, but she kept her lips shut. She cried silently as they continued walking down the hall.

_Your kingdom's come_

_It's waiting still_

_The space between you'll never fill_

_I tried, but I could not change your mind._

…

Katniss kept her eyes on the ceiling as the Capitol nurse squirted a clear gel on her small swollen abdomen. It felt warm and reminded Katniss of something that made something twinge in her stomach. The nurse smeared the gel over her bump. The nurse took out a tool which was connected to machine with a black screen attached to the top.

When the nurse placed a strange tool on her abdomen, Katniss's head turned to see the large black screen, and strange shapes were casted on it. They looked familiar to Katniss and then something very small and round came onto the screen.

The object shifted slightly, and a small noise came from the machine.

"That's the heartbeat."

Katniss felt her insides melt.

_You're alive._

A gasp escaped her mouth. She looked down at her belly. It was hard for her to believe that there was something small and living inside her. There was a sad look on her face, but a small, surprised and happy grin on her lips.

The nurse continued moving the tool and some other shapes came onto the screen.

Suddenly, Katniss's heart had felt like it had stopped.

Tears built up in Katniss's eyes and she covered her mouth with her hand. Her eyes closed and the tears fell freely. She couldn't believe it.

"You're having twins, Miss. Everdeen."


	33. Chapter 32

**Hey everyone! How's your summer been? All good, I hope?**

**So. WE HAVE REACHED THE FINAL CHAPTER OF THIS STORY! It's so cool to see how far I've come when I wrote the first draft to this story on December 20****th****, 2014 (I posted the first chapter online in February though x-P)! I didn't expect it to get so much attention. I expected like 20 followers and stuff. Thank you guys for all the awesome reviews and support. I love you all so much!**

**But there's something you guys should know.**

_**BUT!**_** You'll see once you finish this chapter.**

**Heh.**

_Just close your eyes,_

_The sun is going down._

_You'll be alright,_

_No one can hurt you now._

Katniss and Haymitch walked out towards the large doors. Katniss was walking a faster pace. She wanted to tell Peeta because she couldn't wait to see the expression on his face.

When the doors opened, she was greeted by cool, fresh air. There was snow everywhere, despite it wasn't too cold; and she wasn't wearing a coat. She could slightly see her breath.

On the wide lot, stood a dark silver hovercraft. A few meters away from the hovercraft's opening stood two people, both blonde-haired. At that moment, Katniss realized all the people she loved and cared about at the moment were all blondes.

But maybe that would change, when the baby was born.

_Twins. _She reminded herself. _When the twins are born._

Perhaps they would both be born with their mother's dark hair. Even if they got Peeta's blonde curls, she'd love and care for them just the same.

One of the people started to run towards Katniss, and she realized it was her little sister.

"Katniss!"

Katniss flashed a smile and then walked a little faster. Prim ran into her arms and the two sisters embraced each other. Katniss smiled as she hugged Prim. Then Lily approached them from behind and joined their hug.

"We're going home." Katniss told them, despite she knew they had knowledge of it already. "We're going to be okay from now on."

They passed quiet words between each other. Katniss and Prim felt their mother press kisses to the crown of their heads.

Prim gave Katniss her pin. Turns out the guards had given the pin to Prim while Katniss was on trial. Then she gave her the pearl. Katniss gasped.

"Oh, thank you. Thank you, Prim."  
"You're welcome. I know how much it means to you. I still remember that part, in your second games, when Peeta gave it to you. And then how you kept it with you when Peeta was in the Capitol."

Katniss smiled. "Thank you." She slipped the two tokens into her pocket.

"I…" Katniss muttered. "I need to tell you two something." Katniss let go of Prim and their mother. Katniss had an unsure look on her face.

"I'm… I'm pregnant with twins."

Lily covered her mouth with her hands. Prim's mouth was wide open.

"Really? And they're okay?" She asked, suddenly feeling very excited.

"Yes. The nurse said they looked fine." Prim hugged her sister again. She going to be an aunt. This made her happy.

Lily still felt hesitant about her 17 year old being pregnant. And she still found it a little hard to believe that Katniss and Peeta were in such a relationship for 3 weeks without saying a word. Lily took Katniss into her arms. But at least Peeta was a good man. "Oh, Katniss…" She whispered. "That's amazing. Congratulations. And well… it means twice the work, but we're going to be here for you." Katniss nodded and grinned.  
"And Peeta."  
"Yes, and Peeta." Lily nodded back and kissed Katniss forehead. "I love you." She said, sounding shy.

"…Me too." Katniss replied hesitantly. She pulled away. "Where is he? Peeta?"

"In there." Prim pointed at the hovercraft, which was about 20 meters away. Katniss looked over and saw Haymitch approaching the door. Katniss felt butterflies in her stomach and she made her way towards the open door.

Behind her, she heard Prim and Lily speaking.

"You're going to be an aunt." Lily told her.

Prim giggled. "You're going to be grandma."

She couldn't wait to see him.

To see his charming crooked smile and his clear, blue eyes.

At that moment, Katniss wished to see those same eyes in her children.

When the winter sun shone down on his bright blonde hair, Katniss gasped and covered her mouth with one hand. "Peeta?" She whispered.

He ran towards her and Katniss smiled and let out tears at the same time.

When Peeta was close enough, he slipped his hands under her arms and lifted her up. She wrapped herself around him; her legs and her arms. Her fingers played with the curls near the nape of his neck. Peeta started to kiss her jawline and neck, and then pressed his lips to her bare shoulder (her shirt had slipped to the side, exposing one of her shoulders).

"You're okay!" Peeta yelped. He was speaking very fast. "I thought they were going to hurt you, or… or… torture you or some—" Katniss covered his lips with her finger.

"Sshh. I'm okay. Everything's okay. You don't need to worry about anything. They didn't hurt me."

"Okay. Good. That's good." He panted. They pressed their foreheads together and then Peeta kissed her.

"They can't separate us like that ever again." Peeta told her. "I'm never letting them take you from me ever again."

Hearing those words come from his mouth made her feel treasured.

Katniss wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes. She'd missed this feeling so much- his kisses and is steady arms wrapped around her.

"I love you." Peeta murmured. He kissed her nose and the rest of her face. She giggled and tried to speak between the kisses he would give her on the lips.

"Peeta—" He kissed her. "I have to—" He kissed her again. "I-!" And another kiss. "Peeta!" She pulled her head to the side.

"I have to tell you something, Peeta."

"Yeah?"  
"I'm pregnant."  
Peeta smiled and nodded. "Yeah." He said, nuzzling his nose against hers. "Yeah, I know."

"With twins."

He stopped nuzzling their noses together.  
His blue eyes met her grey ones and Peeta's mouth dropped open like Prim's.

"Are you kidding?" He whispered.  
"No, I'm not kidding. There's two of them." Peeta ran his hands through his hair, with his mouth still open in astonishment.

"You're having twins!" He laughed. He kissed her quickly and lifted her off the ground as he hugged her.

"I can't believe this." He spoke into her hair. He laughed and hugged her very tightly, making her release a squeak which made him laugh again.  
"Well you better." Katniss grinned.

Peeta snickered and then out his hands on her abdomen. "Oh my god….they're… they're actually growing. Your stomach wasn't anything like this last time we saw each other. It's changed so much."

It was a small bump. But now everyone knew why it was noticeable at 3 months.

"Did you feel kicks?"  
"No. No, not yet. The nurse said I'd feel it around 5 months. Something like that, she said."

Peeta kissed her softly this time. His fingers coursed through her hair, starting at the hair growing near her temples, then heading backwards towards the back of her head. In the middle of their kiss, Peeta got slapped in the back by Haymitch. This knocked both Katniss and Peeta out of their dreamy and loving states.

"Ready two go home, you two? You can make out there."

…

When the five of them entered the hovercraft, inside was Finnick, Annie, Johanna and Plutarch.

Finnick got up from his seat to speak to Katniss.  
"Hey." Finnick whispered. "Everything… okay?"  
"I guess you could say that." She whispered back. Finnick ruffled her hair. Johanna and Katniss spoke a bit on the way to their homes.

When Plutarch left, Katniss didn't get up from her seat. Instead, Peeta did, and he thanked him for some reason.

When they got to District 4, Finnick and Annie's district, Katniss and Peeta got up to say goodbye to them.

Finnick whispered into Katniss's ear when she hugged him.

"You have to tell him someday."

Katniss didn't reply or move. She just let his comment sink in. And she realized she didn't fear Gale any longer. All those weeks in the Tribute center paid off. Since she wasn't afraid anymore, she didn't see the need to tell Peeta anymore, either.

Finnick released her and he left with Annie.

…

When they arrived in 12, Katniss was surprised to see how much it had all changed. The rubble was being rebuilt, and there were many people who had come back to the district. Some of those were originally from 12 while others decided to move from their old districts. To get a fresh start in this new life, perhaps.

The sun was going down. Katniss inferred it was around 6 PM.

What was this life going to be like? She and Peeta would wait about 6 more months until the twins arrived. And then the rest of her life would be lived as a mother. But she was still young. That's what scared her. But what could she do? She wasn't going to get hold of any pills. Not again.

Peeta held her hand. "Ready?"

Katniss nodded hesitantly. "Yeah." She replied quietly. Before they headed off, Katniss hugged her mother and Prim.

Then Peeta led her to the house that had belonged to him and his family.

Katniss ran out of the house and ran into her old one, and took clothes back with her.

Once she was back, she changed into her pajamas. Her back was turned to Peeta as she changed, so he couldn't see anything he wanted to see. But he still got a glimpse of skin he hadn't seen or touched in a while.

…

Katniss stared at the fire. Her grey eyes were fixated at the orange flames as they burned the wood. She wore a white knit sweater over top of her long sleeved night shirt. Her hands were on her abdomen, but in her fingers was the mockingjay pin, which had lost its golden color. Her hair was in a messy braid.

The floorboards creaked and Katniss turned around to see Peeta walking towards her. She looked jaded. The fire light turned his blond hair a strange, reddish color. He smiled and sat down next to her. He put an arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to him. Katniss kept her eyes on the fire but shifted her body so it was closer to Peeta's.

Her head slowly lowered onto one of his broad shoulders.

"How are you feeling?" Peeta asked her. Katniss closed her eyes.

"Just tired, I guess." She answered. Peeta nodded at her response. With his index finger he traced shapes on her cheekbone. Katniss snuggled closer and placed her head on his chest.

Peeta looked down at her and saw the pin in her hands.

"Can I see that?" He took the pin from her hands. "I noticed I've never held your pin before." He ran his thumb along the grooves on the bird's wing.

"I didn't expect it to come this far. I thought I'd lose it climbing trees in the first arena. Or I thought the ocean would take it in the second. And then, with the war, I thought it'd just fall off with all the running and stuff."

"Yeah. I thought the same thing."

"I almost gave it to Rue. In my first games."

"Really?" Peeta put the pin back in its owner's hands.

"Yeah. But she had this charm or something, so she refused to take it. I wonder what would've happened if she kept it."  
"Nothing." Peeta kissed her head. "You'd still be my Mockingjay."

"I wouldn't be anyone's Mockingjay. If it weren't for that pin I wouldn't be called a Mockingjay. I'd just be some rebel girl."

"My rebel girl. You'd be mine, no matter what you were."

Katniss scoffed.

"No, really. You would. If that pin had a squirrel on it you'd be my Squirrel." This brought a laugh from Katniss.

"Then I'd be killing and eating my own kind."

"Ooh, you could be my cat."  
"You're cat?" She asked with a strange smile on her face.

"Katniss Everdeen the cat. Leader of the revolution."

"That sounds so ridiculous." Katniss sat up straight. Then she stood up and stretched. "Let's go outside."

"What? Katniss it's like, midnight… plus it's cold—"

"Screw it. Let's go."

They opened the door and sat down on the porch steps.

After a few minutes of starring up at the sky, Katniss found herself in Peeta's arms. She sat in his lap and he had held her in place. He had one arm under her knees and the other under her armpits. Her head was on his chest and she was slowly falling asleep.

Peeta dipped his head down to her neck and kissed the skin there. Katniss let out a breathy moan. His lips nipped at the skin on her jawline, and then made their way to her lips. He kissed her lips softly and continuously. Katniss moaned again and turned her face away. She hid her face in his chest. Peeta smiled.

He slid his hand under her sweater and let his finger make little circles on her back. A smile came to his face. He wrote 'I love you' on her back several times.

Then he got up, with Katniss in his arms, to head back inside.

Before he reached the door, Katniss whispered something to him.

"I love you too."

…

**NOPE NOT THE END**

**HAHA**

**I'm making a 2****nd**** part to HITPWILY!**

**As you would suspect, the 2****nd**** part will go into detail about Katniss and Peeta's lives while pregnant with the twin toast babies. **

**And then… yeah. Then it'll be the end.**

**I'll be writing some more fanfictions as well (multitasking****).**

**Anyways, the 2****nd**** part to this story will be called 'Life Anew' and I will start posting chapters soon****. **

**Special thanks to my bud, s3xysalvatore. I love you, you pickle.**


	34. Special Announcement!

_****ANNOUNCEMENT*****_

**Hi everyone! Just wanted to let you all know that if you are waiting for Life Anew, it is already up. It was posted as a separate story and already has 3 chapters currently. I am assuming that some of you thought it'd continue on this one, so sorry for the confusion, because I think some of you were still waiting xD**

**Yeah, so if you want to read the continued part of HITPWILY, it is up and ready for you. There are some pretty important events in Life Anew… one that many of you have been waiting for.**

**Happy reading guyssss**

**-MarsBarJ**


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